To move because dh inherited property?

[bowmejen3]

So I'm born and bred in Hackney. Met my husband here who is originally from south Manchester in one of the largest council estates In Europe apparently.

We've been married 10 years and have two children. (4 and 2 months)

We rent privately and was looking forward to getting on the shared ownership scheme this year! 4 year old settled in nursery waiting for reception etc! However DH has been very stressed and with rising living costs. We have not got much to spare each month after saving for our deposit.

Now here is my aibu.
Dh father recently died and left his house (ex council but bought) to dh. It has no mortgage left.

Dh thinks this is the best thing ever as we could move there (3 bed semi detached, big garden, driveway, extra room for washing etc)
Be mortgage free, near his family and have essentially more disposable income to enjoy life, holidays, other ventures etc.

I know I know it sounds perfect on paper... but I always envisioned raising my children in London but dh claims we are actually being selfish because potentially they will never be able to afford to live near us in the future and we may only ever own 25 percent of a flat!
And the area he is from has not got a great reputation...

I believe he could sell the house for around £240,000 (from Rightmove) and put it down for a deposit on a house in London!

Dh thinks I'm being ridiculous to want to not be mortgage free just for the sake of "London" and being snobby towards his childhood area? (Which I'm not)

Aibu?

Is wythenshawe where the Marcus Rashford mural is? All those lovely people who covered up the hateful message of one or a few would make me think it’s a good place to be!

Thst said, of course you’re not being unreasonable if you want to live in London where you’re from. He wants to live where he’s from. It’s a difficult one as no one is wrong or right.

I absolutely would not want to live in a massive council estate in Manchester so it's a YANBU from me.

I’m siding with DH, but think you should look sell and get something that you like down the line and move to a nicer part of Manchester.

Manchester has a lot to offer and you will save so much money on everything.
It is win win.

This is coming from a Londoner, that couldn’t imagine moving away from London, but happy as anything living in Wiltshire for the last 10 years to move closer to my partners family.

I'm with your DH. I wouldn't want to bring kids up in london.

YADNBU

"LittleGwyneth
I think people who don't like London probably need to try to understand that the OP does like London, and so saying 'I would move because London is shit' is colossally unhelpful."

I don't think at all that London is shit although I don't want to go back there myself....I do think though that envisaging staying the whole of your life in the place you were brought up is kind of crazy

@Leilala , my ex council 3 bed semi in Wythenshawe is worth 220k. Huge garden, drive way, large bedrooms.

Totally possible that OP's is worth 240! Crazy isn't it. House prices have absolutely shot up.

I’d love to bring my children up in London, I would have loved to grown up somewhere like that myself, but it sounds like it just isn’t affordable for you.

Could you afford a family home in London if you sold the property and used it as a deposit in London? Or not?

If not I would be tempted to sell it and use it as a deposit for a house nicer area in Manchester.

It’s a great deposit for a London house. I’d buy in London.

@ShittyFingers

I’m team DH - but what I’d probably do is sell the house and then move to nice part of Manchester

I wouldn’t live in London if I was paid to though

Same here. I lived in London and moved North over 30 years ago so I could afford to buy. I've never regretted it.

I'm London born and raised but I'd go for Manchester. It's a great city with a wonderful vibe. If you don't like the area sell the house and buy somewhere nicer in the GM area.

@GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing

Is wythenshawe where the Marcus Rashford mural is? All those lovely people who covered up the hateful message of one or a few would make me think it’s a good place to be!

Thst said, of course you’re not being unreasonable if you want to live in London where you’re from. He wants to live where he’s from. It’s a difficult one as no one is wrong or right.

No that’s not Wythenshawe. And what a crazy reason to want to live somewhere! Are you being genuine?

No way would I move to Manchester it's too cold

i would never go to london as i hate it, i would sell the house

Sorry for your loss

There are few opportunities in life

To have inherited a mortgage free property is one of these opportunities /240k

You could potentially be mortgage free now !

I've lived in lots of different places in UK

Potentially, you could sell & move to anywhere

Why don't you take a week or two off & visit Manchester ?

I'm a Londoner born and bred, and I love living here. It's a diverse city. I never understand all these people with chips on their shoulders about London. The OP doesn't care about your opinion about whether you'd live here or not but what's best for her and her family.

OP, was moving up to Manchester ever on the cards before the inheritance?
How have you felt since your family moved out of London?
What is your support network like?
Do you get on with SIL and BIL? (I certainly wouldn't base moving on that; no idea how that relationship can pan out in future, we are not close to our cousins at all.)
Have you seen a mortgage broker?
What is the job situation up in Manchester for you both?

As you are renting, could you move, get jobs in Manchester, save more and then sell up and move back down to London with an even bigger deposit?
Alternatively, see a mortgage broker and ask them what they think you can get down here with a supposed £240k deposit.

I don't think I could ever leave London - and not because it's the best city in the world blah blah, but because it's my home, it's where I'm from, my family is here etc. Doesn't mean it's any better or worse than anywhere else, but I don't think I could move to a location based only on an inherited property.

@Pangolin44

Manchester is a great city I wouldn't move to Wythenshawe though (I presume that's where the property is). It's not great and quite a way from the city itself.

I'd sell the house and possibly consider a move to another area of Manchester.

This is what I’d do. £240k would be fantastic deposit and you could move to a nicer area (Sale, didsbury, Chorlton, old Trafford, whalley range, northenden) close to his family with a small mortgage and great quality of life. We left london for Manchester when we had our first child and never looked back.

@cdba88

What a great investment some people have made then!

Still can’t believe I got on a bus and asked to go to “bag-oo-ley”… the driver looked at me and said “you mean Bag-leh luv” not one of my finer moments

one of the largest council estates In Europe apparently

ex council but bought

And the area he is from has not got a great reputation...

Hmmm…
DH thinks I am being snobby towards his childhood area? (Which I'm not)

Read your comments above. Yes, you really are!!

I would take the mortgage free house and he’s out of London ASAP!

@Shutupandcry
Totally agree.

Not sure why the north gets such a bad image it’s a great place to raise a family, lots to do and good transport links.

@bowmejen3

Ahhh so much to think about!

Gonna throw a big curve ball here too..

My family moved to Birmingham to live with my brother and all my childrens cousins live in Manchester.. same age children from BIL and SIL..

Dh says it's even more of a factor but I said we can't just live somewhere on the hope they will be all close growing up! There quite close now anyways (as close as 4 year olds can be)

You know, I have a cousin that stayed in our hometown because 'all the family' were there and her kids would grow up with lots of cousins & 2nd cousins. Our grandparents moved to the town in 1905 and the whole family still lived there at that point. At one point our extended family in that town numbered 70+ and four generations.

But the majority of 'my generation' of cousins (including me) moved away over time for work opportunities and/or a different lifestyle taking their children with them. Those remaining left when their own children moved away for the same reason. Now she and her two DC (now adults) are the only ones left in the area. Her children now live about 20 miles away, although that's not as bad as it sounds because of the freeways. But still, she doesn't see them as much as she'd like too as they have busy lives.

I guess my point is that nothing remains static. Families can and do move. The days of staying in your hometown for generations is pretty much gone with the dodo. You and DH need to find a place where BOTH of you want to be 'for itself', not simply because the family lives there. Somewhere you can picture yourselves being once the child(ren) are grown and on their own. If that's your hometown, fine. But don't limit yourself.

I’d move to Manchester.
It’s a great city, loads of opportunities and more chance of your children being able to live near you (should they wish!) when they grow up.

@Pangolin44

Manchester is a great city I wouldn't move to Wythenshawe though (I presume that's where the property is). It's not great and quite a way from the city itself.

I'd sell the house and possibly consider a move to another area of Manchester.

This^^ most definitely. My father was born and spent his childhood on that estate but moved to North Manchester when he and my Mum got married as her extensive family lived north of the city. I now live even further north of Manchester on the edge of the Lancashire countryside, after downsizing from my south Manchester home where I lived for over 30 years. I I couldn't afford a bungalow south of Manchester.

There are plenty of decent properties for around £240k north of Manchester but it may be a struggle to find anything in the nicer parts of south Manchester without a mortgage.

Team DH here, and I’ve lived in both. There are pros and cons to either, but mortgage free would be an easy yes from me.

YANBU.

Buying in London will always make a big profit long term. I would choose London (nice part) over a crummy part of Manchester.

BUT my preferred option would be sell your FIL property and buy in a nice part of Manchester. It's friendlier, cheaper and you have the lake District on your doorstep.

Being mortgage free is great if you like living where you live.

I mean, I could be mortgage free if I moved to a horrible area but why would I want to do that?! Id much rather have a little less each month but live somewhere that's family friendly etc.