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Nightmare NY - Forced to tell...forced out...

76 replies

bohemianbint · 01/01/2008 09:47

Happy New Year everyone! Hope you had a good one.

I know I must win moaner of the year award but this is my last one, promise. Here goes...

New Year's Eve. We had decided to stay in what with having DS (16 months) and me in early days and crippling tiredness stages of pregnancy #2. We normally go to my parent's for dinner with a few people which ends up in a bit of a drunken party which is why we weren't going, but then my sister told me hardly anyone was going and it was just going to be a quiet dinner. She swore there would be no dancing on chairs. So we agreed to give it a go (despite having disastrous experience on Christmas Day where we had to get DS out of his bed and drive home.)

First part of the evening was great - DS went down like a dream (he normally takes ages to settle when we've tried to get him to sleep there) we all had dinner and it was fine. We have just decided to tell people I'm pregnant but only immediate family and bestest friends as I'm not quite 7 wks. So we're at the table, (me, DP, parents, my aunty, my sister, her bf, sister's friend and her bf) and my mum says in front of everyone:

"are you going to make an announcement?" So I said no. But obviously then everyone knew; my aunty I didn't mind so much but sister's friend + bf I wasn't mad about as we see them about twice a year but they are on my Facebook and I don't want my good friends finding out second hand on there before we get to tell them. Plus DP hasn't even told his own grandparents yet, and here's our news being dished around the wider world - another aunty called at midnight and my mum merrily told her too. I feel bad saying I don't want to tell x,y,and z, but then, we bloody didn't want to!

Next problem. Just before midnight my sister turns the tv on directly under DS's room really loudly and gets arsey when I tell her to shhhh. Then as soon as it's midnight, suddenly, the music goes on with my dad whacking it up really loud and whaddya know, everyone's singing and shouting. Shortly afterwards, obviously, DS wakes up, won't go back to sleep because of all the racket, and we end up having to bundle him into the car at 1am, coming home. He now thinks it's play time and won't settle, screams until 3.30am and I end up sleeping on the floor in his room with him, which I have never had to do in 16 months.

I'm aware that I sound like a barrel of laughs wanting to kill a party, but the whole thing's just made me really annoyed. The dinner was lovely, but I didn't want our news announced to anyone and everyone, and there was no allowance made for the fact that DS was asleep upstairs. When we left my mum said "oh dear, do you think it was us who woke him up?" !!! and "well surely he'll just go back to sleep" and "why didn't you tell us about the noise?" Last year we asked once on Christmas Day if the stereo could be turned down a bit and DP got dirty looks and told by my sister not to be so stupid as "babies sleep through rock concerts." My sister who doesn't know any babies and doesn't go to rock concerts!

So there we have it. We just shouldn't have gone but we were assured it would be different. The worst thing is, I think I heard my sister ranting about how if we don't like the noise we shouldn't have come (I think) which is a bit rich since it was her who got us to go! I definitely got the impression that it was all about doing whatever and we either fit in or f-off. I think just no one appreciates how hard it is to have a baby at an all night party - my parents have definitely forgotten. When my sister was tiny and napping we were all either thrown out of the house or had to sit 1cm from the silent tv so as not to "wake the baby."

Am I being unreasonable to be so fed up this morning? DP's really angry about the whole thing too. And how on earth do we handle this now without it turning into an argument?

OP posts:
JacanneAbox · 01/01/2008 20:48

Sorry, I just realised how insensitive it was for me to talk about mc on a birth announcement thread - I do, of course, wish you a very healthy and happy pregnancy - I just wanted to say that I know where you're coming from.

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