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Original poster

When people visit your house do they take their shoes offf

476 replies

PlantMummy87 · 09/02/2022 18:19

Do you request people to take their shoes off when they come into your house?

I always take off my shoes whenever I enter someone's home as think it is rude not to as I think on the whole people like to keep their floors and carpets clean. However my FIL, my mum and my dad always keep their shoes on now when they visit ever since I had our baby, it's like as soon as they arrive they instantly want to see baby so just walk straight in and don't think they are causing any extra work cleaning for us. It's happened a lot now so it's not a one off that I can just brush off unfortunately. We have a tiny hallway which think might be part of the problem as don't have space for a chair or stall for someone to be able to sit on to take their shoes on and off on and can understand it might me harder for older people to bend over etc but they used to take their shoes off. When I was heavily pregnant I sat on the stairs but can't expect everyone to do this.

Downstairs is laminate flooring which I guess is easy to clean, but we also have rugs which they step on (which are hard to clean as wool), and upstairs is carpet. I do have a small carpet cleaner, but it's more for spot cleaning than entire areas of carpet and is a lot of hard work to do a large area. Plus I'm not really sure I want to have to clean all the floors, carpet and rugs every time people come to visit as have a newborn baby so don't have a lot of time to be dedicating to cleaning.

Recently our cat got really unwell resulting in lots of expensive vet visits, blood tests, stay at the vets, drip fluids as been so unwell, and now special food to help stomach recover etc. the vet thinks that it may have been something brought into the house perhaps via shoes as she is an indoor cat. It could well have been our shoes that brought something in, but we do take them off in the hallway and then they get put away and I clean the hallway floor daily.

We've spent the day disinfecting the whole house as baby who could easily catch a gastrointestinal upset so I want to be extra careful now, but even when he is a bit bigger and putting things in his mouth, crawling and walking I want to know things are clean for him in our home.

Do you think it is unreasonable to ask next time anyone comes around to ask if they can take their shoes off? I'm not really sure how to bring this up though and I don't want to cause drama especially with my FIL.
I'm thinking of putting a small foot stall next to the hallway just inside the living room (there isn't enough room to put it in the hallway) so people can take their shoes off on there and it's easier to keep clean. But it is made of wool so I'm a bit concerned that it might get dirty. Would it be better/ridiculous to get a collapsible ottoman and bring that out when people visiting and store away easily when not?

OP posts:
CaraVanDam · 10/02/2022 20:53

Do people ask their guests to take shoes off if they're hosting dinner or a party?

2022success · 10/02/2022 20:57

Yes

FitBy40 · 10/02/2022 21:05

I wear shoes in the house and sit/lay on the bed with my outdoor clothes on...

When people visit your house do they take their shoes offf
OchonAgusOchonOh · 10/02/2022 21:08

@2022success

Yes
How depressing.
YellowAndGreenToBeSeen · 10/02/2022 21:09

I’d hate to have to take my shoes off for a dinner party. I’d feel unwelcome.

Daphodils · 10/02/2022 21:16

@FitBy40

I wear shoes in the house and sit/lay on the bed with my outdoor clothes on...
I lie on my bed with my shoes on.

(Although I have died of bubonic plague on several occasions.)

AllThingsServeTheBeam · 10/02/2022 21:17

@CaraVanDam

Asking people to take their shoes off is totally unnecessary and offensive
I don't do it.. bit offensive?! Really?! Wow
Daphodils · 10/02/2022 21:23

@EnglishMuffins

My ILs used to do this so I bought a sign and hung it non-discreetly in the hall which said “as little fingers touch our floor, leave your shoes at the door”, and it worked. Shoes indoors is disgusting . The soles of your shoe contain billions of bacteria, e-coli, dog shit, sick spray, spit, pesticides… I don’t want that multiplying in my carpet and decreasing the longevity of my carpet, nor do I want my DC crawling and picking up all sorts from dirty floors. It’s bad manners in my opinion, to not remove your shoes in someone else’s home, unless you’ve been specifically told it’s ok to leave them on.
There are so many things wrong about this post. But principally that witless doggerel does not come close to scanning!

(May I suggest second line: Please leave your footwear at the door.)

(And therapy Grin)

buzzy06 · 10/02/2022 21:26

Sensing some defensiveness from people who wear shoes. Why would it be depressing or inhospitable to be in socks or slippers lmao, much more sterile to wear shoes and have to sit up straight.

My guests can put their feet up on the sofa and don't have to step on mud bits on the floor, much more inviting and friendly rather sitting like you're in a business meeting

SnowFlo · 10/02/2022 21:47

The soles of your shoe contain billions of bacteria, e-coli, dog shit, sick spray, spit, pesticides… I don’t want that multiplying in my carpet and decreasing the longevity of my carpet, nor do I want my DC crawling and picking up all sorts from dirty floors.

When mine were crawling, I took them to the local park and let them crawl in the grass Shock

BuddhaForMary · 10/02/2022 21:48

I lie on my bed with my shoes on.

(Although I have died of bubonic plague on several occasions.)

😂😂😂

FangsForTheMemory · 10/02/2022 21:50

Almost everyone who comes in my house takes their shoes off without being asked to. The only people who don't are tradesmen and I put mats down for them.

Daphodils · 10/02/2022 21:55

@FangsForTheMemory

Almost everyone who comes in my house takes their shoes off without being asked to. The only people who don't are tradesmen and I put mats down for them.
It's the safest solution with the working classes, no matter what they're wearing.

And for fuck's sake don't let them anywhere near your bog. The filthy bastards will only shit in it.

Blossomtoes · 10/02/2022 22:06

Sensing some defensiveness from people who wear shoes.

I think the appropriate d word is actually derision. 😂

catgirl1976 · 10/02/2022 22:12

No of course not. It would be incredibly rude to ask people to remove their shoes

And as MN is class obsessed it’s worth noting it’s frightful non u darling (channelling Jilly)

OchonAgusOchonOh · 10/02/2022 22:25

@buzzy06

Sensing some defensiveness from people who wear shoes. Why would it be depressing or inhospitable to be in socks or slippers lmao, much more sterile to wear shoes and have to sit up straight.

My guests can put their feet up on the sofa and don't have to step on mud bits on the floor, much more inviting and friendly rather sitting like you're in a business meeting

Have your friends not mastered the art of wiping their shoes at the door? And what are they up to before arriving for dinner to be arriving with mud on their shoes. And how is serving dinner to your guests while they lounge around with their feet on the sofa in any way comfortable?

So many questions...

Curiousmouse · 10/02/2022 23:36

It doesn't matter OP what other people do-you don't like it, and that's fair enough. If you are unreasonable about anything, it is that you should just ask them straight to remove their shoes, and not waste time asking others or having to clean floors. Your house, your rules.

headlock · 11/02/2022 00:11

I find it's the older generation that instinctively leave shoes on. My PIL do which does annoy me but they're not here that often to make a fuss.
My friends always take shoes off before walking on carpets.

Shodan · 11/02/2022 00:13

In the same way that people find it 'shockingly bad manners' to ask people to take off shoes, I absolutely judge people who allow shoes on in their house (as dirty bastards) and ask people to take them off in mine. Yuk. Dirty bastards!!

I can assure you I'm quite clean- I had a bath just last year. And my parents were married.

I'll tell you something truly shocking though- sometimes NAKED BOTTOMS touch my bedsheets Shock Shock

There truly is no hope for me Sad Sad

headlock · 11/02/2022 00:15

Although we have a dog so he brings all kinds of crap in.

Needdoughnuts · 11/02/2022 00:41

@headlock

I find it's the older generation that instinctively leave shoes on. My PIL do which does annoy me but they're not here that often to make a fuss. My friends always take shoes off before walking on carpets.
Why do you think older people leave their shoes on? Mobility problems Arthritis Back problems Trying to balance on one leg Getting down to take shoe off and needing help getting up Etc

I'm in my 60s with a back problem. If I'm visiting someone precious I have to dig out an old pair of slip on shoes because shoes with zips, buckles or laces mean I have to lay on a bed, back straight and feet in the air to put them on or take them off. Do you have a bed in your lobby for me? Smile

Melissa1771 · 11/02/2022 01:15

I used to think it was ott to ask guests to take off shoes. But of course I would do it because it’s their home! I also didn’t really understand issue ls re hygiene and babies. But now I’ve lived in East Asia it’s the norm here and I’ll never go back. It’s crazy to me to think I used to wear my shoes all around the house. Funny how my perception has changed

SquirrelG · 11/02/2022 02:16

Who knew Mrs Bucket was based on 50% of mumsnet.

Grin Grin Grin

BadLad · 11/02/2022 05:25

Who knew Mrs Bucket was based on 50% of mumsnet.

Everybody knows that. What we can't agree on is which 50% she was based on.

8londie · 11/02/2022 08:11

Next well say washing dishes is OTT. Being clean is not OTT and it's not that easy to clean stuff out of mud and carpet. It won't make you sick but it's just unpleasant.