Health visitor put finger in 4 week old’s mouth

[zeena83]

And she didn’t wash her hands. I was too busy being freaked out by her talking about my baby’s failure to gain enough weight and before I could say anything she was checking him for tongue tie and had her finger in his mouth. She had also been putting things in the clinical waste bin and did not wash her hands although I don’t think there was anything too gross in it, it wasn’t a room where anything particularly clinical happens. What should I do? All I can do is sit here worrying about what he might have caught, I am so so desperately upset by this

Do dentists examine us with just washed hands? Even if she had, gloves should be used too.

Ok so full story we went into the room and she was wearing gloves. She then went in and out of the room, touching door handles etc with same gloves. After weighing him, she then mentioned tongue tie. I thought about asking her to change her gloves but she is an incredibly irritating person who gives continuous orders (put him here, put a blanket on him, where is your red book etc) and doesn’t give anyone a chance to think. I had my back to her completing one of her many demands and my husband saw her push all the tissues she had laid out for us down into the clinical waste bin. Before we could think she was grabbing at my baby’s face. She then used a small amount of hand sanitizer on her same used gloves before proceeding to jab around inside his mouth. It’s really obviously not good and now I am sitting around and worrying about what she has done to my baby and what she has exposed him to

What she did wasn't ideal but I think you are being far too dramatic. Baby needs to build their immune system up, keeping them germ free is no good for them either. I panicked once when an old relative he gave 3 week old a dirty dummy. But all was fine. You should probably have your anxiety dealt with, your response is severely extreme.

OP, I've just seen your last update. I can see where you're coming from - being a first-time parent is so hard - but this isn't a normal level of anxiety. I think you definitely need to talk it through with someone and also consider discussing your reaction with the GP. I was brought up by a parent who developed extreme anxiety/OCD when I was small and honestly it blighted everyone's lives for many decades.

@MrsSkylerWhite

Marmelace

Caught my youngest sucking on the dogs tail.“

At 4 weeks?

No, about 4 months, he was on my lap, my arm around his waist sitting on a rug, dog was standing next us, turned my head for a second and when I looked back he was happily sucking the poor dogs tail. The dog was very nonchalant about it all.

I understand why you feel this way, especially if this is your first baby but I promise they will be ok. You have to remember how many babies are born with older siblings who regularly being viruses home from school, they survive and are absolutely fine. Believe it or not, bugs are actually a good thing to help them build up their immune system. Babies with dogs in the house have a stronger immune system apparently because they’re exposed to more bacteria than those without. Bacteria is mostly a good thing for the immune system, it needs to get stronger.

OP, your reaction isn't normal. Can you talk to anyone in real life about this?

@zeena83

Ok so full story we went into the room and she was wearing gloves. She then went in and out of the room, touching door handles etc with same gloves. After weighing him, she then mentioned tongue tie. I thought about asking her to change her gloves but she is an incredibly irritating person who gives continuous orders (put him here, put a blanket on him, where is your red book etc) and doesn’t give anyone a chance to think. I had my back to her completing one of her many demands and my husband saw her push all the tissues she had laid out for us down into the clinical waste bin. Before we could think she was grabbing at my baby’s face. She then used a small amount of hand sanitizer on her same used gloves before proceeding to jab around inside his mouth. It’s really obviously not good and now I am sitting around and worrying about what she has done to my baby and what she has exposed him to

So she did use sanitiser. Your baby will be absolutely fine.

You really need some support for your anxiety. It’s not healthy. The obsessive googling and ‘spiralling’ is textbook. See a GP .

She sounds unpleasant. Are you able to transfer to another HV? (the team in our smallish town had a staff of 3).

Your baby will be fine from what happened with the HV. You will soon see babies put all manner of shit in their mouths and do absolutely fine.
You should get some support for your anxiety because that is something that actually could affect your child.

Try not to worry, she used handsanitizer and plenty of newborns have older, often snotty toddler siblings who kiss them and poke them in the mouth and are perfectly fine.

Ot may help to talk to someone if you are feeling overly anxious about things, having a baby during a pandemic must be really difficult .

@zeena83 are you getting anxious a lot? Sorry don't really know how to put it. You can actually get post natal anxiety, I had this with my first, I remember things like crossing the road and being scared we'd get run over, there was no reason to feel that way, but I did. Germs weren't a focus for me, it was more worrying I'd drop her, even though it never even came close to doing it, or we'd get hit by a car. Probably other things too, but I remember these specifically. I wish I'd known at the time what it was, I only found out about it after our second was born. If you find you're getting anxious a lot or having obsessive worries like this about germs, please seek help, doesn't need to be the HV, you could speak to your GP about your worries, if they're impacting your life negatively or won't go away.

She should have washed hands/put clean gloves on and asked your permission to put her finger in your babys mouth, so it isn't good practice. Now it's done though, please don't worry. Your baby will be fine. It sounds like you're breastfeeding too, which will help protect your baby. But even if you're not, your baby will be fine! Babies are coming into contact with germs all the time and their bodies are quickly learning how to deal with them.

Did the HV find a tongue tie?

As for the anxiety, it is pretty normal to feel anxious about everything postnatally. It's nature's way of making sure the baby is protected! But if it's extreme and you find it interfering with your daily life or happiness, then it's worth a mention to your GP. They deal with this all the time, so don't worry about that.

Congratulations on your new baby x

Your are massively overreacting. Listen to what more experienced parents are saying, instead of spiralling into anxiety. Frankly you should have been discussing with this health visitor your anxieties as you clearly need some help. Forget about the incident and speak to her or your Gp about your mental health.

P. S. Ignore the unhelpful comments on here. It's like everyone has forgotten what it feels like to have a brand new baby.

She was handling rubbish and then put her hand in his mouth? Make a formal complaint.

I’m sick of health visitors disempowering mothers and stressing them out.

You baby probably hasn’t caught anything but that’s no thanks to her.

@ChampionOfTheSun

Hi OP, I'm just wondering if you've had any trained feeding support for you and your baby if baby isn't gaining enough weight? Lots of HCP haven't had very much infant feeding training and sometimes you will find the advice you are given isn't quite up to date. If you are breastfeeding, calling the National Breastfeeding Helpline on 0300 100 0212 could be really useful to you, it's open 9.30-9.30. I'm sorry that this experience has caused you such anxiety, it is really tough being a new parent

Repeating this, because it's so important.

I'm also going to repeat another point from upthread. The HV would have cleaned her hands between patients and likely used her foot to open the clinical waste bin, so whilst not best practice, the risk of transferring organisms is reduced.

What I will say is that you would benefit from a HCP you can trust and build a relationship with. Both to support you as a new Mum and to help with feeding your baby.

How did you find the advice the HV gave? Is she someone you could trust? If not, you might benefit from seeing someone else and keeping HV visits to the minimum.

People are being so awful on this thread. Eye rolling emoticons and sniggering, just despicable.

I’d be grossed out too, OP. That’s really poor practice. I’m sure your baby will be fine, but I feel your distress - four weeks post Partum is a tricky time.

@GoIntoTheLight

People are being so awful on this thread. Eye rolling emoticons and sniggering, just despicable.

I’d be grossed out too, OP. That’s really poor practice. I’m sure your baby will be fine, but I feel your distress - four weeks post Partum is a tricky time.

The vast majority of posters have been kind but level-headed. Don't amplify the tiny minority.

@Moosewillow

I do not think your over reacting at all. That was so unprofessional and awful if im being honest. She will have been in her csr or public transport, in her work bag, at other people's houses ect and she puts her fingers in your week old baby mouth without washing them when there is covid about!!!! Shocking! Don't beat yourself up about not saying anything . A midwife dropped a bottle on the floor without sliding zbd then rammed it into my 6 day old babys mouth and I said nothing through pure shock and terror and embarrassment tbh. I'm a first time mother. Now I wish I said somthing. Honestly SOME of these "professionals " are vile they really are. I had A HORRIFIC experience in hospital having my daughter in November. The hospital rang to apologise and a HEALTH CARE ASSISTANT will be loosing her job for what she done. She had no right, she's got no medical qualifications or medical training yet she made a chart on my baby. Fuming isn't the word. Especially when an actual DOCTOR AND midwife came down and was horrified at the chart and said it was wrong . But anyway don't beat ur self up. The midwife should have known better. Id ring the surgery and report it. My baby st 10 weeks got covid, not nice. And midwives sticking their dirty unwashed fingers in a new born mouth is not good , its not professional,its not hygienic, its not right. They have a "duty of care" towards people and with covid aboit washing hands should be the number 1 thing before touching a baby never mind ramming her fingers it its mouth. I'm so sorry you went things abd are feeling upset. Ive read people say "it will be fine" bla bla bla, but I can tell its really bugging you abd I don't blame you. The bottle thing bugs me now, it makes you feel like they don't give a crap about giving your baby (or mine) germs or covid! P.s I have a house rabbit the midwife seen roaming about aswell and she didn't wipe or run bottle under water. I'm fuming now typing this . But yeah I feel you x

Calm down! Where did it say she ‘rammed’ her finger in the baby’s mouth!

Can I suggest that what is really unkind is feeding the OPs anxiety about the HV whilst ignoring the fact that her baby is underweight?

I’d be more worried about the lack of weight gain. And even that isn’t worth spiralling or panicking about.

@Cuck00soup

Can I suggest that what is really unkind is feeding the OPs anxiety about the HV whilst ignoring the fact that her baby is underweight?

Because it’s mumsnet so HVs are all evil, and no one is ever allowed to suggest that breastfeeding isn’t perfect.

Its not good practice and I'd be a bit WTF but I don't think its actually dangerous.

There's some very mean comments on here. This sort of thing would have massively upset me when my Dc were babies.

I would imagine that the hv washed her hands between patients and you probably just didn't see this happening.

Your baby will be fine