Tell me you're a parent without telling me you're a parent

[TerribleTuna]

I'll go...

I've watched the same animated film every day for 2 weeks 🙃

I'm currently reading the worst witch.

I get woken up at 5.30 with the call it's morning because someone else has a child

On a good day I can sellotape a hand back onto the arm of a Lego minifigure.

@Ormally

On a good day I can sellotape a hand back onto the arm of a Lego minifigure.

I tried cello tape for Barbie's shoes classic fail

I had the chorus of "gascon" from beauty and the beast going round in my head at work, just the chorus over and over

I can tell you the milkshake schedule

We don’t talk about Bruno here either

I also have a collection of favourite stones at the bottom of my handbag.

I'm the strong one, I'm not nervous 💪

@justasking111, blu tak is your friend for Barbie, but watch your carpets!!

I come complete with immatation engine reving noises when bringing tabs into view on a work meeting doh!

I ended up waiting for someone in the car in a supermarket car park for nearly two hours the other week. It was more alone time than I have had at a weekend for YEARS and I enjoyed every second of silence, on my own, eating chocolate without having to share.

I use baby wipes for cleaning around the house as I go, got packs of baby wipes always handy, they are good to clear all kind of messes, on the floor, carpets, worktops, bathrooms, furniture, etc in fact I wipe almost everything with baby wipes

Because I said so!

I appear to live in Blackpool illuminations and have a bathroom that is always in use when I need it, my fridge has a hole in it that the food I fill it with falls out of because it's never there when I go back for it, my clothes vanish and reappear in the wash bin, without me wearing them, I appear to have lost the ability to understand speech in some circumstances as questions or statements from me are met with grunts rather than words, and I get to pay all the bills too!

I'm hiding downstairs with a can of rum and coke and listening in to a bedtime meditation blasting away hopefully upstairs.

Even on my own, when I'm stood waiting in line at the supermarket till, I rock the trolley back and forth whilst "🎶WAFFLE DOGGY🎵" is singing in my head.

I spent my evening fishing a poo out of the bath 🤮

I am unable to finish a conversation with a friend, or anyone for that matter, without being interrupted 20 times, by the time I get back to said conversation I can't remember what I was talking about.

It feels unusual not to cheer when alone and a green man signals that the road is ready to cross.

Me: "awwww....look how cute he sneezes..."

Df:

I know where all the best local building sites with diggers are.

You’re Welcome has been no 1 in my Spotify wrapped for 3 years in a row. Soon to be knocked off by Bruno I expect.

I pulled a pair of red dinosaur pants out of my coat pocket, on yard duty in my school

@Moonshine9

I got shouted at today for cutting a sandwich into triangles rather than squares.

Memories of being told they wanted quarters because they got more than if it was in halves. (Thank you Piaget) Can you tell that M and D were maths teachers????