Dh bullying my son?

[trixey]

My son is autistic, goes to an sen school, he loves animals. He has no proper friends sadly. We adopted a cat about a year ago. DS adores the cat.

Every now and then Dh will joke to DS that he's going to take the cat away. DS laughs but the joke carries on until DS asks me if Dh is being serious. I of course say he is joking.

It's becoming a bit if a thing. Maybe once a week. I should add that Dh isn't DS father. It's his step father.

I don't see anything funny with this. I have asked Dh to stop but that 'joke' continues.

I know in my head what I feel...I'll see if you all agree with me.

Your husband is a spiteful twat.

Horribly cruel. This cannot be allowed to continue.

I agree with you

Get rid of the husband

He’s a cunt

You’re spot on, this is nasty, bullying behaviour.

Tell him coldly and clearly it stops now. And if he continues, you know what you need to do.

That's so cruel! What an arsehole, it's not the cat that needs getting rid of.

What a spiteful spineless man.

Is he cruel in other ways to your ds?

retort to DS that DH will be sent away first.
Not joking, obvs

He is abusing a vulnerable dc. Your vulnerable dc.. Get rid or you are as guilty..

Your husband likes to upset your son.

Yes. He's a bully.

Keep the cat and get rid of the twat. Or, tell him it’s a non- negotiable and to stop bullying your son. If he doesn’t, then decision made. He sounds mean and unkind. Not the qualities I’d want in a husband.

If you’ve repeatedly asked him to stop and he hasn’t then he’s a bully yes.

You shouldn’t have to ask more than once. And he should have been mortified to realise he’d upset your son.

It’s made me feel really sad for your little boy. My son would be devastated if he thought our pets were being taken away.

Tell your “D”H that the next time he says the cat is being taken away he’s out. And mean it.

You shouldn’t have to ask him to stop doing something cruel like that.

It’s mean. My dad was a pretty lovely fella but if I came home from playing at a friends, or whatever, and my mum wasn’t there I’d ask where she was. His answer? “She’s run off with a black man”.

I have no idea why he said this - he loved everybody and had a wide group of very diverse friends, but it absolutely terrified me when I was six or seven years old.

It's like when you've got a pet rabbit who's obviously part of the family but people joke about him being rabbit pie
Sooooo funny. Not

Thanks all.

Replies were as I obviously suspected. When you are in it, Dh is laughing like he's really just joking. He does end up sometimes saying 'oh I'm only joking, I'd never get rid of the cat'

There's absolutely no need for his behaviour.

As a step father, he doesn't show love as in he isn't affectionate with with DS. Doesn't really do anything with him at all tbh. It's as DS has grown older, (he's 13) they have drifted apart.

Even giving your DH the benefit of the doubt, it's very unkind. Especially since you've asked him to stop. YANBU.
Next time your DH says it, make your own joke about how, whenever he does take the cat away, he'll be accompanying it?

The only possible reason he can be doing this is to upset your son.
Also you asked him to stop and he didn’t.

Does he live with you?

That's horrible OP. You know that already, you know what to do.

Don't ask him to stop, tell him if it doesn't gucking stop you will get rid of him! Twat.

Fucking ( my phone hates swearing)

I’d tell him he’s being cruel and it has to stop.. or else you will be reconsidering the relationship

@Berthatydfil

He’s a cunt

My sentiments exactly.

I know what to do. Don't worry. I have been making an exit plan for a while now.

They used to be quite close. During lockdown he was absolutely great with DS. I would of been lost without him.

But since DS has started secondary school and teenage hormones have come in, it's just gone down hill.