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AIBU?

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Original poster

To expect people I know to read my book?

464 replies

bethc765 · 04/02/2022 15:32

In October I released my first book. It's something I've been working on for a long time and something I've dreamt of since I was little.

It's been really well received, got a brilliant critical reception and I've had excellent feedback from readers.

But not a single person apart from my DH has even bought it. I was out with a friend recently and we went into Waterstones and I pointed it out and she remarked "oh i didn't realise it was a proper book and in shops and stuff".

I have a signing event coming up in March and mentioned it in passing and my friends seemed perplexed as to why anyone would want a book signed by me.

I support my friends with their endeavours so I'm a little bit hurt that nobody I know has shown the slightest bit of interest in something that was really important to me. I'm not even asking them to read it- just pretend they have!

OP posts:
SoosanCarter · 04/02/2022 20:59

If you paid to have it published, it’s probably awful.

charlotterousse · 04/02/2022 21:15

@SoosanCarter

If you paid to have it published, it’s probably awful.
She didn't pay to have it published. That much is obvious from her opening post. Waterstones don't offer book signings to people who pay vanity presses to print their work.

I'm astonished by the amount of sourness on this thread. Sneering at someone's book as "probably chick lit" (the insinuation being that it's not worth reading), suggestions that the OP is making it all up, and the question marks over whether she actually has a proper publishing contract - all this feels like asking an architect who's just completed their first project if they're sure it's an actual building and not just Lego. So patronising and mean-spirited.

Sparklingbrook · 04/02/2022 21:17

There is a bit of a tone to some of these posts. About a book nobody on here has read. Well knowingly anyway.
Maybe the thread is full of frustrated authors all green with envy. Envy

whiteworldgettingwhiter · 04/02/2022 21:17

@SoosanCarter

If you paid to have it published, it’s probably awful.
It's stocked in Waterstones, you tit. How many books have you published? Why are you so set and judgemental?
whiteworldgettingwhiter · 04/02/2022 21:18

*sneery, not set

RainbowZebraWarrior · 04/02/2022 21:22

This reply has been deleted

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ChubbyMorticia · 04/02/2022 21:24

@IvanaTrumps

If you had a friend who was a plumber, would you expect them to redo your bathroom for free? If a friend was a chef, would you expect them to cater a party for you for free? Or an artist to paint a mural on your wall for free?

You won't get much plumbing or a refit of a bathroom for the cost of a book (£12 hardback?)

What a ridiculous comparison.

Exactly. So, months/years worth of someone’s work, for a mere $12, and people balk at it.
RainbowZebraWarrior · 04/02/2022 21:31

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stuntbubbles · 04/02/2022 21:31

@SoosanCarter

If you paid to have it published, it’s probably awful.
Try reading the OP again instead of inventing stuff that didn’t happen.
Wreath21 · 04/02/2022 21:32

@strawberriesarenot

Having worked in publishing for the last 30 years, have to say, that except to the author and the publisher other people's books have about the same charm as other people's sticky kids/dogs/holiday photos.

Friends and relations often kindly volunteer to read them, but being expected to go out and buy them is a bit much. And as I said earlier, you'd better check your contract, because you should have had gratis copies. Between 12 and 20, depending on hb or pb.

But every book a reader buys is some 'other person's' work. If you don't think anyone likes books except the author then maybe you should be reconsidering your career choices...
EezyOozy · 04/02/2022 21:34

I think you're being unreasonable. I do loads of ace things that nobody gives a shit about, they're too busy with their own lives. Be glad that others people genuinely interested in it and aren't just reading because you're their mate!

Wreath21 · 04/02/2022 21:37

@SoosanCarter

If you paid to have it published, it’s probably awful.
Not necessarily these days (and even back in the day, people who self-published sometimes wrote good books that were just hard to market).

Though it's clear from this thread that OP was traditionally published.

Franticbutterfly · 04/02/2022 21:43

YANBU congratulations on your book!

(I imagine if I did something similar I would get the same response).

JinglingHellsBells · 04/02/2022 21:59

It's more usual to say 'My first book/ debut novel/whatever book was 'published' (not 'released')
Music tends to be released but maybe I'm being picky.

But not a single person apart from my DH has even bought it

Well clearly a LOT of people have bought and read it as you also wrote

It's been really well received, got a brilliant critical reception and I've had excellent feedback from readers

So which is it?

Clearly you mean no friends have read it?

They aren't obliged to read it, but they give you a big pat on the back.

There are quite a few rather odd things in your post like when you say they could pretend to have read it (to make you feel happy.)

Why would they risk doing that? If you ask them about it, or try to discuss it, how could they? Why would you encourage them to lie to you?

Sorry but there is a lot here that sounds rather odd.

strawberriesarenot · 04/02/2022 22:03

Wreath21 Of course you're right. I put that badly. I meant within the author's personal life.
As in, you would never ask an author to collect reviews from friends and family, or push sales on friends and family. Their goodwill shouldn't be assumed; it should be a free choice whether they read a book or not.
And to be honest, 'my best friend loves my book' isn't much to go on. What is needed is for complete strangers to love the book.
(Anyway, I don't believe in this book very much.)

YesitsBess · 04/02/2022 22:09

I got pissed off with some of my family for not reading my magazine work, not least because it was on topics they enjoy? So I get you on that score.

I don't ever expect my friends to read my stuff though, it's not broad appeal so unless I've made a joke about them in the column I don't mention it.

threestars · 04/02/2022 22:35

I have only one friend who has been published - many times now, since her first at the age of 22 or 23.
I have bought every single one. I was so excited for her when her first was published, and it's still exciting now. She's a childhood friend and years go past now between seeing each other, so YANBU to be disappointed that regular friends are disinterested. Our school friends all comment supportively when she posts to say she has a new book out.
Be proud of yourself and blow your own trumpet a little so they recognise it's a big deal.
Some odd comments on here. Always surprises me how insular some people can be. Don't let them make you second-guess yourself.

strawberriesarenot · 04/02/2022 23:35

unici5

Well, we will have to agree to differ. In my experience, one book authors are rare to vanishing- the cost of publicity for a single book just wouldn't be invested.
A sales bump of 20 due to friends around publication day wouldn't register.
50 Amazon reviews minimum to have any real effect.
Goodreads very much geared to the US market.
Agree a social media presence and keeping it up is an absolute must. Webpages and twitter and Instagram too these days.
Also agree that I am pretty old fashioned and started off in the days when Gollancz was in Henrietta Street and Hachette in France.

BewitchedBotheredandBewildered · 04/02/2022 23:39

I expect people who start threads to respond to people who comment.

thing47 · 04/02/2022 23:41

DH writes books (non-fiction), published by a reputable mainstream publisher and stocked in Waterstones, Smith's etc. He gets given 12-15 hardback copies, and can buy more at half-price any time he wants. He gives these to close friends, beyond that he would not expect friends to buy them unless they have an interest in the subject(s). He has no idea if the ones he gives out get read, though he has seen them in a couple pf friends' bathrooms Smile

Joystir59 · 04/02/2022 23:47

Can I have a link to it I will buy it if it appeals. Always looking for a good read and I'm.surprosed your friends aren't curious and supportive and buying it.

cakewench · 04/02/2022 23:47

Ok well as someone who has a friend who has published a series of books and probably wonders the same thing:

Her books are not my sort of thing at all. I typed out a long explanation but have erased it because I don’t want it to be too outing, and I do like my friend. But I don’t want to recommend her books to people because I’ve read chapters of them and I’d feel badly to mislead others into thinking they’re something I rate as being good.

I can be friends with someone without approving of whatever it is they do as a job or hobby. You might be an A+ friend but a C- coworker. Same for being an author. Just let your friends be, and promote your work yourself. There’s any number of reasons why they might not be supporting you.

Joystir59 · 04/02/2022 23:47

Surprised even.

HelloFrostyMorning · 04/02/2022 23:52

Another plopper. Posts 1 post, and then doesn't return.

So I won't waste much time with a bunch of posts - or a big post.

@bethc765 YABU. Good for you that you have achieved this probably self published book publication, but not everyone else is going to be as excited as you, if excited at all.

A woman I know had her DD get into Kings College London, to do a law degree. She was buzzing and ranting about her amazing daughter's achievement. Honestly........ nobody gave a shiny shit........

HeadacheEarthquake · 04/02/2022 23:53

Yanbu

I've published and my nearest have at least bought, read and commented/reviewed

If a mate of mine published a book I'd read it. It's called being supportive and it's normal among friends.

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