Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask whether they really meant to invite my child to the party?

144 replies

Mackmama · 03/02/2022 20:34

I was talking to a mum in the school yard this morning who mentioned it was her child’s birthday and that it was great because this year at least he’ll be able to have a proper party.

I haven’t seen an invite for my child and I’m pretty sure my child and the one who’s birthday it is get along. I asked my child and he said all the others are going but he hasn’t been invited.

I’m wondering whether the invite has been lost or whether my child has been accidentally missed out. Equally I feel like it would be cheeky to ask and awkward if in fact for some reason they meant not to invite him, should I ask or just leave it?

OP posts:
pollymere · 05/02/2022 09:48

Mention to her that your son had an invite but gave it back so you weren't sure what was happening in the confusion.

finished31 · 05/02/2022 15:02

@pollymere

Mention to her that your son had an invite but gave it back so you weren't sure what was happening in the confusion.
This
Lurkerlot · 05/02/2022 17:29

Maybe the mum mentioned it to you as you hadn’t RSVPd

Murdoch1949 · 05/02/2022 17:44

From the mislabelled invite, it does seem that your son was invited. Just brace yourself and speak to the mum, “my son thinks he’s been invited to your son’s birthday party but I haven’t seen an invite. It’s absolutely no problem at all if he hasn’t been, but I didn’t want to seem rude and not turn up if he was invited”.

Orangemoon77 · 05/02/2022 17:49

It’s hard to know what to do. At our school we have a mix of whole class, small parties, just boys, just girls etc. it could be that they are having a small party and it’s not just your child who’s not going.

I also know when I organised my child’s party they didn’t invite 6 from the class. But wasn’t being mean, just doesn’t play with them. I even tried so hard to convince them as I liked a few of the mums… so tough!

Repecka · 05/02/2022 18:29

If the child’s mother brought it up with you…then the chances are she has probably intended to invite yourself.

It would be weird to exclude one child and then have a discussion with their mum about it

Blondeshavemorefun · 05/02/2022 18:29

So did you ask @Mackmama

HumphreysCorner · 05/02/2022 18:31

When I sent DS's invites out one of his classmates was on holiday. Fast forward to the party and said classmate and parents were there before us. His dad said we've come as I'm sure you would have invited classmate if we had been here. Er no, he wouldn't.

Original poster
Mackmama · 05/02/2022 18:34

I didn’t ask but I think the party is next weekend so there’s still time to.

OP posts:
Lukeaway · 05/02/2022 18:45

Blame it on your child, say “dc said they are invited to the party but I don’t have an invite, just checking if they are mixed up or lost the invite”

HelloKeith · 05/02/2022 18:46

For her 7th birthday DD wrote out her own invitations - we'd made a list together beforehand though. Then I started getting RSVPs from people not on the list. She knew where the packet of invites were and had written a load more and taken them into school Shock This was before class WhatsApp as well so I had to just cater for the amount of invites missing from the pack because DD was not owning up who exactly she'd invited Grin

Iwonderifiwonderwhy · 05/02/2022 18:52

OP are your friends wtib another mum who could maybe find out for you if it’s supposed to be a whole class party or just some kids invited? Less awkward

MrsGHarrison87 · 05/02/2022 19:01

I wouldn't ask. It just makes it awkward for everyone if he's not invited. Or she'll say he is invited to save embarrassment and you'll be none the wiser. Unless you know that the whole class has been invited, don't ask.

Newbabynewhouse · 05/02/2022 20:00

It almost sounds like she wants you to kmow hes been left out...is there any reason shed have to try and hurt your feelings?

Ownedbyafrenchie · 05/02/2022 20:19

@TheOriginalEmu

She would have to be a special kind of bitch to talk to you about the party that everyone else but you’re child is invited too, surely? I would ask her. Worst that can happen is she outs herself as a cow. In which case you know where you stand.
This!
Mandyjack · 05/02/2022 21:37

@whoopstheregoesmyshouldet

How close are they? I've still not forgiven my son's best friend at the age of 7 snubbing him and asking everyone else. He was heartbroken
Might not have been his decision
Mandyjack · 05/02/2022 21:38

If you have her number just message her to make it less awkward and ask her

PeachyPeachTrees · 06/02/2022 21:29

If they are not really close, I'd leave it.

Bignanny30 · 07/02/2022 10:26

I’d leave it save embarrassment on all parts. And I wouldn’t say too much if anything about it in front of son or question him on it to prevent him feeling left out.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page