I devastated by my 26 yr old daughters tattoos

[Choclover27]

Yup. I hate them. Today she showed me her new ‘sleeve’. It’s big black bold and bloody awful. She already has numerous tattoos and they’re getting bigger each time. She seems addicted. I don’t like tattoos. I don’t have to like them. That’s my choice. I’ve cried over it/her in private ! I’ve read up about parents reactions to our kids tattoos. And we are supposed to be happy that they are expressing themselves. But I’m struggling with that. I was ok with a few, ok with all the piercings… but the sleeve is too far. In my opinion. Does anyone else feel like me or am I the bitch mother from hell?

I feel it sorts of others people. So they are not of your tribe, your way of thinking. Which is disconcerting. I presume that's the reason they do it.

They were also used to subordinate, identify slaves and count the millions of death camp victims - not so much freedom of expression then eh?

Op I would be really upset too. I don't think you are going to get anything useful from this thread. Your feelings are genuine and valid.
You sound like a really caring mum x

@NoJaffaCakesAreKeptInThisVan

YANBU this is one of my worst nightmares.

This craze couldn’t die out any sooner. There are so many young ladies that seem to be showing off their all over body tattoos on Facebook etc maybe thinking it’s cool and edgy.

Gone are the days when people had one or two small, tasteful tattoos - I remember my hairdresser having a scattering of beautiful pastel stars on her foot and ankle. This current trend for sleeves etc is the most unattractive thing ever and more like self-harm than art.

Self harm, I think you need to reassess your comment. In no way shape or form have a used tattoo's as self harm. These comments on this thread are absolutely horrendous. From using them to tar single mothers, unemployed people, people using it as a form of self harming ITS ABSOLUTELY DISGUSTING! Just because people have tattoos doesn't make them any lesser of a person, you guys with your horrible comments and discrimination against people with tattoos are the lesser people here.

@MrFsAunt

Who said they "created beautiful skin'?

I made children with perfect lovely skin

From page one, there are lots of variations of this throughout

I would be upset too. Really upset. However I would not let on to her just how much. I'd try to keep relations sweet with my daughter.

Her body, her choice🤷🏼‍♀️

They have become so mainstream now, for women as well as men, that there's nothing in the least bit 'edgy' about tattoos.

I think the odd discreet one is fine, but I'm sure many people will regret them once they evolve from being young, free spirits!

I'm with you, OP.

There is no point crying over spilt milk.
And it’s not like she murdered someone, you have too much time on your hands if you are obsessing over this. Get a grip. Tattoos aren’t forever these days anyway / she’ll get it lasered off on a couple of years when it goes all green and fuzzy looking - like mouldy cheese. You could set up a fund for laser treatment, instead of buying g her birthday or Xmas presents - stick the money in an ISA for her. And mention it in every special occasion card 🤣 I’m sure she will be thrilled with such a thoughtful gift.

At least it's not on her face. Imagine that.

@MrFsAunt

They were also used to subordinate, identify slaves and count the millions of death camp victims - not so much freedom of expression then eh?

This is one of the reasons I dislike them. I come from a Jewish background and think of how the Nazis would tattoo numbers on people. Horrible connotations.

Maybe that’s what people with a lot of tattoos like to think, but believe me people do talk behind their backs... They usually see them as “easy” or a someone to be used for fun. That’s the reality ... if you want to choose either a normal relationship or a good career, they’re a bad idea

There must be an awful lot of "talking behind their backs" going on here then - not that I have heard any of it - as tattoos are so mainstream. Honestly, what sort of a judgemental, small minded, place do you live in?

OFGS! The OP gave birth to a child with, presumably, a beautiful unblemished skin, which said child has deliberately massively scarred

This one about the skin is from 17 minutes ago. As PP said the thread is full of the skin rubbish.

Humans have been having tattoos and a range of other body modifications from minor to extreme for thousands of years. Maybe for about as long as there have been humans. 🤷‍♀️

YANBU. I'd be upset too and there's a distinct lack of empathy on here (probably people who are covered in tats themselves). You know it's not your business but it's fine to be upset in private. Try not to let it take over though, it's not something you have any say in or can change

YANBU to hate them. I would feel the same way (my kids are currently primary school age so we are a way off tattoos yet but I know it could happen. Yes of course it’s not the end of the world and you are glad she is happy and healthy but that doesn’t mean you don’t feel upset that your baby (even a fully independent adult) has got something permanently marking their skin that you think looks awful.

YANBU

A bit of an extreme reaction don't you think?

You are perfectly entitled to your own negative opinion about tattoos but it is her body and she is an adult.

Frankly if your daughter is happy in her life in general, is healthy and has no major issues to face count your blessings and focus on the positive.

No need to make a drama out of something you can't and should not try to control.

All those saying ‘she can get them lasered off’. The answer is. No you can’t. Layering is a long slow process that doesn’t successfully remove all traces, particularly yellow and red colours, and can only be done on a small area at a time. Six treatments and my shoulder tattoo ‘that I would always love’ is still visible.

I can totally understand that Comedycook.

I really like tattoos, there is some beautiful work out there.

However, fashion trends evolve constantly and while there are peopme who have had and will gave tattoos for the love of the art, my concern is that a number of people are having tattoos to be on trend, and while I'm sure they understand they are permanent, in 30 or 40 years, they might not want them, or like how they have 'worn' over time.

Yes, tattoo remival is an option, but it is costly and painful and can leave other marks in place of the tattoo.

It is people having them as they are in fashion that may, not definitely but may, have regrets further down the line. I dont understand why many people who change their appearance often.eg clothing trends or hair cut or dye especially more extreme self images then have tattoos that are permanrnt.

Obviously this isntbthe case for everyone, andcwhile I would love some I don't trust I would always be hapoy with tje peice permanently.

[quote TamTamChew]@GADDay

I just worry about what her mental state would be to do that and also the kind of men who would be interested in her and what they’d associate all the tattoos with. Young women who seem troubled are more likely to attract users and guys who are sexually weird and this is like a neon sign to them.[/quote]
This is the biggest load of bollocks. My god this place is crazy sometimes.

YABU.
It’s her body.

Lots of my loved ones have tattoos, I don’t see the issue.

Admittedly my son is only two, but I’m having a hard time putting myself in OP’s shoes. I don’t get it.