People who go on local Facebook groups and post this sort of thing

[OrangeIsTheNewRed]

Does anyone else eyeroll at people who go on local social media groups and post things like:

'Anyone else spot the 11 police cars, ambulance and helicopter flying along x road just now? I hope it's nothing serious?!?!'

And

'I found a bank card outside the bank on the high street 4 days ago and I am keeping it safe. If you have lost one pm me and I will ask you questions to check if it's yours.'

And

'I'm sure that the parents of the teenagers in the chip shop will be really proud of the language their little darlings were using just now!'

Etc.

I know I could just leave the groups but they are useful for things like plasterer recommendations and checking when the tip is open and who is the best tree pruner in the area, etc.

It's not just be who finds this annoying, is it?

Our village is tiny so it’s things like sheep escaped, when is bin day and lost cats etc.

With only 80 people in the group (and most don’t post) it’s very quiet so I don’t mind it! If I lived in a city I might feel differently!

'Don't go into the long grass'

God I love the local Facebook for this.

Especially the woman obsessed with her cat going missing - multiple posts as cat not been seen since the morning. Because it’s a cat, which I’m not sure she’s clocked yet.

“FOUND was in the attic thanks all xxx”

Gosh, we get all sorts and I do love the drama (it’s not too dissimilar to MN!) lol.

There have been so many ring cam videos of people trying cars etc. it is actually quite alarming.

I like the delivery location ones where a parcel has been delivered, but not to the intended recipient. Everyone sends suggestions to try and identify the address where the picture of a package on a random wheelie bin down the side of someone’s house, of course the dropped pin locator isn’t accurate!

On our local street page here’s an ongoing argument about a few things: how to spend some management money; improve some facilities for residents’ kids (not an overhead swimming pool!) and parking on pavements (which everyone has to do as if you parked on the road you wouldn’t get through it, plus they’re wide enough for wheelchairs etc. )

Sooo many lost cards. No idea people araull used them to this amount when. Although I use the pay thing on my phone.

I love the cat ones. “Found this poor thing searching for food outside Aldi, looks like a pregnant female, going to try to trap her tomorrow can someone text the lady with the chip scanner?” and it turns out to be fat Barry from two doors down chancing his arm again.

Our FB page also has lots of “who owns the sheep in the big field opposite where the turnoff to the old pub with the thing on the roof used to be? Some of them are out on the road again” which is handy. Although we once had a massive row about a cow and the moderators had to ban people.

Maybe I'm a bitch but if I find a random bank card I take it home, cut it up and put it in the bin. I'd rather it was destroyed for them...

We get a lot of cat based ones on our local FB.
Either (i) Our cat has been missing for 2 hours. Please check everywhere. Accompanied by 17 pics of cat or (ii) ‘Is this your cat? I’ve seen if walking down the pavement twice in two days. It’s definitely lost / abandoned.’ Followed by 195 replies saying ‘take it to the vets’ or ‘Ethel is this Tiddles that you lost in 1974?’

I love cats, but they do wander around, they’re quite well known for it. In my cat owning days, they used to be out for days sometimes.

That sounds like my FB group!

My favourite one was during the first lockdown in 2020 - the 'only go out for essentials' one. Some bright spark took it upon herself to do a one woman traffic survey along our main road and complained that there were too many cars with just the driver and no passengers.

Actually, the same person stood outside a local supermarket and complained too nany people were coming out with just one item so it couldn't be essential!

For the bank card one, for those asking, the issue is that it assumes the person will A) be on Facebook, B) be on that specific Facebook group, and C) will check it regularly enough to see the post. Highly unlikely. Just hand it in to the bank, the Police (for other valuable lost property especially), or last resort if you can't would be to destroy it. THEN you could post on Facebook that that's where it is, in case they see it - but no harm it they don't.

@Ilovelblue

That sounds like my FB group!

My favourite one was during the first lockdown in 2020 - the 'only go out for essentials' one. Some bright spark took it upon herself to do a one woman traffic survey along our main road and complained that there were too many cars with just the driver and no passengers.

Actually, the same person stood outside a local supermarket and complained too nany people were coming out with just one item so it couldn't be essential!

I'm going to miss the self appointed Covid marshals. They finally had something juicy to get their teeth stuck into. Wonder what they'll latch onto next 🤔

There is no police station, no bank, no shop where I live. We did once find a card and fortunately recognised the name.

My favourite questions are the ones that could easily be answered by Google...

What is the telephone number for the council offices?

And my faves are....
I found an exercise bike on market place last week and now I can't seem to find it?

@crosbystillsandmash

It's the 'anyone know what time Asda is open today' that gets me.

You're on your smartphone ffs, just chuffing google it Brenda!!!

And some pages require posts to be approved first, so she could be waiting nigh on several hours to find out this information!

Ours is full of dog poo posts. Posts about a large black scruffy cat walking around with a rat in his mouth ( hes mine) hes a bastard. Then every Thursday we get Dave whos a binfluencer. Telling us what colour bin to put out the next day.

I love all the busy bodying, mind numbing my boring posts. It’s very cosy, safe and British

My favourites during lockdown were "are there big queues at Sainsbury's?" like it was always going to be the same!

We've got one bloke who puts things on to sell like he's on QVC:

'Do NOT miss out on the amazing offer! You'll wonder how you lived without this amazing gadget in your life!! In a stunning burgundy & silver colour, this must have piece will be a stunning centrepiece in any trendy, modern kitchen!!!'.

Brian, it's a fruit bowl.

@Ilovelblue

That sounds like my FB group!

My favourite one was during the first lockdown in 2020 - the 'only go out for essentials' one. Some bright spark took it upon herself to do a one woman traffic survey along our main road and complained that there were too many cars with just the driver and no passengers.

Actually, the same person stood outside a local supermarket and complained too nany people were coming out with just one item so it couldn't be essential!

That's hilarious, BONKERS but hilarious 😂😂

Oh yes I find ours highly entertaining. There seem to be some real characters in our fairly small town and they post on a regular basis, complaining about x, y and z. Then we have our local comedians who offer up replies; cue the original poster getting very offended:

“I was only trying to help/do my bit/no need to be sarcastic”

Some of the posts and following comments are similar to here when you’re tempted to get the popcorn out as you’re reading!

Ah yes the 'dog poo and parking' brigade. Personally I find them very useful, I mean how else would I know there were fireworks being let off or that the police helicopter was about?

My favourite are perhaps the 'is this anyone's cat/dog/budgie/etc.' always tempted to reply that yes, logically it probably does belong to someone.

Oh yes, and anything that begins 'to the person....' Just move on, they don't care.

I live close to a major hospital, on a flight path which is frequently flown over by the air ambulance coming from more remote areas, particularly the islands.

Every time - EVERY TIME - it goes over, there is the inevitable 'anybody kno y air ambulance out? Hope all OK xxx'.

Firstly, see point 1. Secondly, there is generally no such thing as the 'everything's fine' air ambulance.

My 'lost' cat has been on ours more than once literally just sunning herself on the street yards from home, as cats do. Leave other people's cats alone ffs.

My favourite ever was a picture of a (terrified looking) cat in someone's shed, with the caption along the lines of "anyone lost this cat? I found it wandering in my street so I'm keeping it safe in my shed for now".
It has to be me who has lost the plot, because nobody else raised the bleeding obvious... How on earth did you determine a cat was 'lost'?? You've essentially kidnapped the sodding thing?!

m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=10166129691200046&id=772420045&m_entstream_source=timeline

We had someone recently who found a key on the street and said they’re return it to the person who could name the 3 letters on it…until someone pointed out it was probably an ERA key which loads of people have so a) easy to guess the letters or b) still can’t be sure that’s their key just from the letters