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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To use benefits to put down a deposit for a house

435 replies

Bringinglightandpeace · 28/01/2022 14:08

Hello all,

This thread is not about me.

I have a friend who is feeling incredibly guilty. This is how it goes... so she applied for benefits, she has children and a husband,,, well technically partner but anyway she received a huge backlog of benefits. She confided in me that she would like to use the money to to put down a deposit for a help to buy scheme or shared ownership. I told her "well you have to use every opportunity that you can get" but in my conscience, I was thinking, is this right? I am on benefits myself so not judging at all. She feels a bit down about it as it's not her hard on money that she used to put a deposit down..but then again some parents give their children money for a deposit... so I guess it's similar.

However, I feel a bit of itch and thought to myself that I don't think what she is doing is right. But then again, I don't want to come across as jealous. What do you all think?

OP posts:
Kebabandchipsplease · 28/01/2022 16:16

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ChipButtyCurrySauce · 28/01/2022 16:17

She hasn't told the council that her husband is living with her

Yeah that's fraud! She's not entitled to that money and should never have claimed it.

Lovemusic33 · 28/01/2022 16:17

And of course it’s fraud, you don’t seem very bright OP. If someone else is living in your home you have to declare it as their earnings should go to paying half the bills. Yes they are not married but he’s working so can pay the bills? It’s not about security for her, if he was to move out she would then get the security of claiming benefits to help pay her bills, she wouldn’t get this security if she buys a house with him.

ilovesooty · 28/01/2022 16:19

If you're not directly involved in this I'd stay well out of it.

Whammyyammy · 28/01/2022 16:19

Do the DWP fraud teams not carry out simple actions such as speaking to forums such as MN to gain information or IP addresses if needed? Would seem a relatively simple way to invest in today's world.

Original poster
Bringinglightandpeace · 28/01/2022 16:21

@Whammyyammy

Do the DWP fraud teams not carry out simple actions such as speaking to forums such as MN to gain information or IP addresses if needed? Would seem a relatively simple way to invest in today's world.
Omg.....
OP posts:
Onthefloor2 · 28/01/2022 16:22

Of course it’s wrong and I’m aware it’s against the law, I’m not denying those facts.

I’m saying the law is outdated, lots of people don’t marry these days who are born and raised in a council estate.

It doesn’t matter if her boyfriend earns 30k, if his not sharing it or using it to help her with the financials then it means nothings.
I’m saying if you declare a boy/girlfriend lives with you and their salary affects your right to benefits then part of their salary should HAVE to go towards finances.

The bottom line is a boyfriend can walk out at anytime too. Regardless of him living there she still IS a single parent.

(I’m not saying this is right, but an updated version of the law with regards to benefit entitlement is very, very overdue! As it’s so outdated now)

MsAgnesDiPesto · 28/01/2022 16:23

Whammyyammy
Do the DWP fraud teams not carry out simple actions such as speaking to forums such as MN to gain information or IP addresses if needed? Would seem a relatively simple way to invest in today's world.

Omg.....

Why are you worried, OP? It’s not like you were the one who made the fraudulent claim…

Peaplant20 · 28/01/2022 16:23

It sounds like a great way to spend the money, what am I missing?

JustLyra · 28/01/2022 16:23

It sounds like she’s going to be, or is, a victim of financial abuse - it’s quite a common tactic for men to persuade women to claim as a single parent “for a short while” and then use blackmail to make them continue. There’s absolutely no risk to the men as they haven’t claimed or signed anything.

Dishwashersaurous · 28/01/2022 16:24

And if you know other people who are doing this as well, then you should also report them.

This is fraud pure and simple.

And money spent on fraudulent claims is less money for genuine claims, schools, NHS, roads etc.

Plus it plays into the narrative that benefit claimants are scroungers who don't deserve public money, making it easier for governments to take money away from the genuinely vulnerable and needy.

anon12345678901 · 28/01/2022 16:24

@Whammyyammy

Do the DWP fraud teams not carry out simple actions such as speaking to forums such as MN to gain information or IP addresses if needed? Would seem a relatively simple way to invest in today's world.
That would be so nice if they did. I'd definitely support them doing that.
OvertheRainbow2U · 28/01/2022 16:24

if partner is living there and she is claiming as a single person then it's fraud - irrelevant if she's paying all the bills, benefit not there to cover his arse.

BUT if backdated to when (if) she was a single parent - ie; him not living with her a that time - it's hers to with as she pleases.

MsAgnesDiPesto · 28/01/2022 16:25

@Onthefloor2

Of course it’s wrong and I’m aware it’s against the law, I’m not denying those facts.

I’m saying the law is outdated, lots of people don’t marry these days who are born and raised in a council estate.

It doesn’t matter if her boyfriend earns 30k, if his not sharing it or using it to help her with the financials then it means nothings.
I’m saying if you declare a boy/girlfriend lives with you and their salary affects your right to benefits then part of their salary should HAVE to go towards finances.

The bottom line is a boyfriend can walk out at anytime too. Regardless of him living there she still IS a single parent.

(I’m not saying this is right, but an updated version of the law with regards to benefit entitlement is very, very overdue! As it’s so outdated now)

If you don’t ensure that a partner pays his way in a relationship where you are jointly responsible for your costs, like shared housing, then you throw him out.

Your inability to conduct an equitable relationship doesn’t mean that I have to pay instead of him.

Raise your standards and only become linked financially with reliable men.

Whammyyammy · 28/01/2022 16:29

@Peaplant20

It sounds like a great way to spend the money, what am I missing?
Your missing the blatant benefit deception. Claimant stated she's a single parent, raking in the cash..whilst living with her working boyfriend, who's not declared as living in the home. Boyfriend pays the bills with his wages benefits saved up to use as house deposit.
JohnStonesMissus · 28/01/2022 16:29

Are you SURE it's not you OP?

52andblue · 28/01/2022 16:30

I'd be a bit worried for her actually. Its a really bad idea to live with someone but claim benefits as a single person. She isnt in fact pooling resources with her partner but the DWP will assume she is so its no gain but potentially lots of pain there. Then if she hands her DWP 'windfall' over to him to use as a deposit for a house in his name he can cut her out. But if it goes in her name too she'd have to declare it which again will affect her benefits unless she conceals it. Not risks I'd be willing to take either re benefits or the partner.

Whammyyammy · 28/01/2022 16:33

I hope whoever the claimant is in this scenario is now waiting for that brown envelope or telephone call.... someone will report her soon.....tick tock.....

Genuine claimants thst are really struggling must be sick by reading this.

WonderfulYou · 28/01/2022 16:34

Reported this thread. Benefit fraud isn't cool. If your friend was my friend I'd have grassed her in and told her about it.

Why would you report it??
OP is not saying it’s cool.

I started a similar thread a couple of years ago and the majority said I shouldn’t report the person committing benefit fraud as it was none of my business.

misssunshine4040 · 28/01/2022 16:36

@Kebabandchipsplease

I work in Benefit Fraud, and with a claim that is large enough to be a deposit on a house, then she is looking at repaying all that back, then a civil penalty, prosecution which could end up as a custodial sentence.

The claimant can try and justify it all they want, but the black and white of it is it's a fraudulent claim and she WILL get caught, maybe not in the next week or 2, might not even be in the next year, but it WILL happen

Clearly not given the amount of benefit fraud that goes undetected so there is no guarantee they "will" get caught
Dishwashersaurous · 28/01/2022 16:36

And it sounds like she's getting a health top up, referring to pip and then a means tested top up. Which suggests that she is not well enough to work full-time.

But everyone in her plan is thatbshe will work full-time to get a mortgage.

This all sounds so confusing.

She needs to go to citizens advice and ask for help to sort it all out

woodhill · 28/01/2022 16:37

@Bringinglightandpeace

No she has not been honest. She lives in a private rented accommodation but receives housing benefit. She has not told the council that her spouse lives with her as he has a high multitude of debts and she is concerned that he wouldn't pay the rent.
So totally dishonest

I really don't agree with people claiming single parent benefit when they have a live in partner but I suspect it is rife

LouisRenault · 28/01/2022 16:40

It’s just a boyfriend, that’s not much really is it, in way of him having to contribute towards the cost of life, so why their salary is taken into account doesn’t make sense.

OP says this woman has recently had a baby. If the man she is living with is the father of one or more of her children, he's a lot more than 'just a boyfriend', and of course he should be contributing to the cost of the household.

girlmom21 · 28/01/2022 16:41

@JohnStonesMissus

Are you SURE it's not you OP?
She's hardly gonna turn round now and go "oh yeah actually it is me and I'm going to report myself for benefit fraud" is she?
Willyoujustbequiet · 28/01/2022 16:41

It depends on the benefit - some like PIP aren't means tested so living with a partner makes no difference.