We can see our neighbour’s bathroom - WWYD?

[rumbuba]

We live on a street of terraced houses. Opposite us is a house split into flats.
Upstairs flat has a bathroom at the front, with terribly frosted glass and no blinds, but what looks like a curtain to one side.
I think their shower is right at the window because you can often, clearly, see bodies.

My kids bedroom is the one that faces their flat.
They happily shout out / giggle when there’s a “naked bum” at the window and I remind them that it’s a shower and the privacy glass isn’t great so just ignore / not nice to stare etc. Not a big deal.

However, for the second time, I have had to distract a kid from the naked person opposite a lot more hastily because the naked person is enjoying their own company rather a lot.

I’ve discussed this with my husband and my neighbours and here’s what we’ve come up with:

1. Post a note through their door to ask if they could pull the curtain when they use the shower as the frosted glass is not effective (my idea)
2. Post a note but with a haiku (neighbour 1’s idea, my husband’s words “Personal pleasure // Bathroom curtain left open // Neighbour eyeballs scorched”
3. Put a sign up on our window “if you can read this, we can see you” (my husband’s idea)
4. Next time, take a photo and post it in as blackmail (neighbour 2)
5. Take a photo and project it onto the outside of their house (also neighbour 2)
6. Do nothing, say nothing, don’t make eye contact, don’t let my kids look out of the window.

So, AIBU to go with #1? Should we go for something else?
Any ideas not on the list that we should consider?

[Ellowyn]

Your frosted glass is no good
we can see your morning wood
a sight to behold across the road
as wanker man shoots his load

[FireMeetGasoline]

Anything other than number 1 is unreasonable.

What would you write for number 2 out of interest?

'I say your cock,

Don't wish to mock,

Use a sock!'

Anyway, I told my neighbour, who lives in a bungalow, that I could clearly see her adult son's bits as I walked down my drive. She laughed and now has blinds.

[Geppili]

[Saltyquiche]

Naked bodies I wouldn’t worry too much about, naked bodies having saucy fun might require a screen of film on your own window or clever planting

[Saltyquiche]

Window stickers? Very large ones

[Grasping]

@Adatwistscientist

I think the haiku would demonstrate that the street is full of middle class wankers far more than the shower performances.

[saturdayhelicopter]

Can't you just knock and have a conversation? All the pearl clutching and 'send an anonymous haiku' but a few weeks ago some bastard who sent an anonymous letter about noise was (quite rightly) ripped to shreds for not having the guts to knock and have a conversation.

If it's too cringey then send a note but at least let them know it's the house opposite getting an eyeful. Then if it continues you know it's gratuitous and can go down the 'clearly a perv' route.

[Buttermuffin]

Just knock on the door and tell them. I really don't see the issue..

[Zonder]

I am sure they already know and don't care. So I'd go with #2 just to let them know the rest of the street does care.

[FrankGrillosWrist]

Aaaaw come on OP, this wanker knows exactly what he’s doing.

[Benjispruce5]

Definitely option 1. Though you may have already sorted it as @PAFMO is obviously the offending neighbour.

[billyt]

The old woman who loved to stir the shit for neighbours called the Police on us once. Said she could see us in the bathroom and it was disgusting.

Police came and I showed them the bathroom. Frosted glass and shower curtain across the window. You couldn't have a shower without the curtain across. She would have had to have x-ray vision to see anything. (When we replaced the bathroom we had the layout changed so the bath wasn't under the window. not for her sake but was better space.)

She is now causing chaos in hell, I assume. No way she was going to heaven.

Op, they (hopefully) are unaware so just drop a note or knock the door.

[WaltzingToWalsingham]

These haikus and limericks are absolutely fantastic! Some of you guys should be nominated to be the next Poet Laureate - I had no idea MN had so mmuch creativity and talent!

OP, I think that, given the sensitivity of the situation, knocking on the door would be too embarrassing for all concerned. Choose from one of the splendid rhymes posted upthread and pop it through his letterbox. That should solve the problem with humour and tact (if it persists, you might have to be more direct next time).

[CynsterBitch]

Stop looking in my bathroom window

[Norgie]

The houses opposite me all have bathrooms facing my house.
It's naked bodies galore, despite frosted glass.
I can tell you for a fact that the couple who live directly opposite, that he leans on the wall with a hand either side of the window when he pee's. He must have excellent aim! The toilet is directly beneath the window.
His wife doesn't wash her hands when she's been to the toilet. Mucky mare!
Their teenage daughter spends forever brushing her hair and squeezing her spots.
The bloke adjoining them shaves in the shower and his wife sometimes wears a shower cap.
The lady on their other side has a bath at 20.00 each night.
We just shrug and go about our own business.

[expensiveshite]

To all the people claiming that they must know- at uni we because friends with the lads next door. They refused to believe that we could see them through the frosted glass until we gave them some personal details about their bathroom habits!

[EezyOozy]

Oh for goodness sake just knock on the door and tell them you can see them when they go in the shower and they need some better obscuring glass.

[crumpet]

My friends had an anonymous note posted through the door for something similar. They never knew which neighbours did it, but aside from being embarrassed they were glad to have had it pointed out to them so they could do something about it. They just hadn’t realised how see through the frosted glass was.

[shedevill]

Jesus, just tell them with a quick discreet note and be done with it. Not nice to be the laughing stock of the street.

[Iagreewithmrsdevere]

They know you can see them
This is deliberate behaviour
Perverts gonna Perv
No need to be nice about it

[GrannytoaUnicorn]

If they're flats then they're probably students/young people. I'm not entirely sure they'd understand a haiku and almost certainly wouldn't get what onanistic meant!

Have you decided on an action plan, OP? @rumbuba

[Chocolateis1ofyour5aday]

When you have to put the bathroom light on in early mornings frosted windows become useless. Put a note through their door and tell them! If they don't pull the blind they're an exhibitionist!
We have a "lovely" view into a bathroom with a frosted window from our local bus stop!

[MuchTooTired]

You could send them a print out of the spam ‘we’ve got footage of you wanking to porn’ email that’s doing the rounds, but rather than ask for a one of payment of $2000 ask for a tenner to buy them some frosted glass vinyl sheets.

[PAFMO]

@Benjispruce5

Definitely option 1. Though you may have already sorted it as *@PAFMO* is obviously the offending neighbour.

Nah. Just been on MN too long not to recognise a bid for classics when I see one.

[Getyourjinglebellsinarow]

Stick a note through "your neighbours can see you wanking in the shower, you should probably put up a curtain/blind."