To walk alone for 45mins at 8pm?

[imamumgetmeoutofhere]

Just that really.

Told my DH I would be walking home from work tonight, finish 8pm.

It takes around 40-45mins. There are no busses at this time. He feels I should get a taxi, mainly due to the attacks on women that have been published in the media recently. I've said I can't justify the expense and am more than happy walking, usually do if it's daylight. We live in a holiday resort area but it's along 3 fairly busy main roads so won't be in any isolated areas.

He usually collects me but he has covid so can't collect me and I don't drive.

AIBU to think its fine to walk home at this time of the day in the dark or should I follow his advise and get a taxi and claw the cost back elsewhere?

Surely if he’s just in the car he can come and collect you even if he has covid.

I walk in the dark regularly, 50-55 mins. I’m in a big city so it’s like walking through central London in the evening. I sometimes take the bus but I just love walking home after a long day at work. If the neighbourhoods were unsafe I wouldn’t walk, but it’s all lit, busy and as safe as it gets.

@2pinkginsplease

I personally wouldn’t walk home in the dark myself. I bet Sarah Everard thought she was safe walking home the night she did it. She walked busy residential and shopping areas.

If it were me dh would put a mask on and drive with windows open to pick me up or I would get a taxi home.

Why would he have to drive with a mask and windows open @2pinkginsplease ?

What a weird suggestion, does your DH drive some kind of chemical disposal wagon

OP's DH has COVID @givememykeys

I'd walk. I also go jogging by myself. I am aware of the risks - they are miniscule compared to the mental and physical health benefits of walking and running.

If you're happy to walk, don't let your DH make you feel unsafe - it's not his decision to make.

Yes this is a key point for me. It’s about what you feel safe doing.

@MissHavishamsMouldyOldCake

Oh fgs.

You'll be absolutely fine walking home along a busy road at 8pm.

Some people would be happy if women never left their bloody homes 'best not risk it, babe'.

Absolutely. Are women supposed to hide away just in case? What about single women - do we stay indoors as there's no man to come and be our knight in shining armour?

I would - and do - walk at 8pm (or later) and/or in the dark in an area I knew well and where I felt safe enough. I would not allow anyone else to make that decision for me, whether directly or indirectly via pressure.

If other people want to not go out at night, take taxis everywhere then that's up to them but I find it quite sad that women are willing to limit their lives in this way.

Taxi.
We are in a nice area and finish at 8pm, one of the woman I work with (20 something) was attacked on the way home, she walk was about 30 min if she tales her time.
So now if anyone is left walking alone one of us who drives will drop them home.

I personally feel safer walking on roads than in a taxi - however it makes me mad that we have to consider that is safer. They should both be safe!

The only reason I wouldn't walk would be lazyness. I wouldn't personally think twice about it from a safety perspective.

@HaveringWavering

Let's not gaslight the women who don't feel safe as though they're being over dramatic and paranoid.

Isn’t gaslighting when you try to convince somebody that something the know to be true did not happen, so that hey start to doubt their sanity?

You can’t use “gaslighting” in this context because they are believing a thing that is NOT true. It is not gaslighting to tell them that they are safe, even if they believe that they are not. It is trying to help them understand risk.

I think what you mean is that we should not mock them for their fear, or minimise their feelings.

Is "Let's not gaslight" the new "Be kind" in the don't-say-anything-I-don't-want-to-hear stakes?

I wouldn't walk in the dark by myself.

God what a vile world that this is the consensus

If your DH is worried then chat to him on the phone all the way home, tell him the street that you're turning into every time you change direction so that he knows where you are.

I would absolutely walk it. I regularly go for a jog at that time alone or with dd2 and would have an issue at all. I’ve walked home from town after midnight alone which is around a 45 minute walk.

I am lucky enough to live in a safe area though, you know your area and whether or not you would feel safe.

I'd walk if I knew the area and it was well lit etc

I wouldn't do it where we live because there are no pavements and it's all narrow winding lanes so there is a risk of being hit by a car, particularly a speedy local

• wouldn’t have an issue.

Hollieguard.

Not the answer perhaps but might reassure him a little and make you feel safe. But that doesn't mean you should take risks.

I would. It's always seemed to me, contrary to our instincts, that you're more at risk in busier areas, or if you establish a pattern. Attackers don't loom in isolated areas on the off chance a lone woman might walk past one day.

I would walk it

@CornishGem1975

OP's DH has COVID *@givememykeys*

Yes, but they're not strangers - they live together.

Unless they're both wearing masks in the house 24/7, I don't understand why would he need to wear one in the car?

Personally I would walk. I used to do it all the time as long as it was along main roads. That's not to say others are wrong though.

Wow I’d walk it busy area, main roads what’s the issue? 8pm Perfectly normal time to be out it’s dark at 430 in winter what difference does it make? Neither makes it worse or safer than the other.

Taxi! You can’t put a price on safety.

Surprised so many people wouldn’t walk at this time, are woman now going to be housebound after dark? Bad things definitely do happen but this feels very strange and a very strange message to give to our teenage daughters. When they are 15, 16 for example we are going to say they cannot go out unless chaperoned or accompanied by a parent

The taxi driver could be a creep. The taxi could be in a collision with another car...