To walk alone for 45mins at 8pm?

[imamumgetmeoutofhere]

Just that really.

Told my DH I would be walking home from work tonight, finish 8pm.

It takes around 40-45mins. There are no busses at this time. He feels I should get a taxi, mainly due to the attacks on women that have been published in the media recently. I've said I can't justify the expense and am more than happy walking, usually do if it's daylight. We live in a holiday resort area but it's along 3 fairly busy main roads so won't be in any isolated areas.

He usually collects me but he has covid so can't collect me and I don't drive.

AIBU to think its fine to walk home at this time of the day in the dark or should I follow his advise and get a taxi and claw the cost back elsewhere?

I would walk. At least you are in the open and can run away or call for help.

If you are in a locked taxi, not so great. Also some of them are awful drivers. It would have to be a really dodgy area before I'd get a taxi over bus (if available) or walking.

I would still ask him to collect you. If he stays in the car what's the difference?

If he has COVID, he will be fine picking you up at 8pm. If not, walking 40 minutes will also be fine.

MissHavishamsMouldyOldCake ."Its a risk too far" Just in the last few weeks we have lost a beautiful Schoolteacher in Ireland ,Another in London in the Summer ,Poor Sarah Everard to name just a few. Of course we should be safe to walk the streets but we are obv not it seems! Just that to be safe is all

As long as well lit and busy - I'd defo walk.

Stranger attacks are vanishingly small on the street . It's why disgusting attacks such as on Sarah Everard are so shocking.

I don’t understand why he can’t collect you, unless he is too sick to drive?

That's how long it takes to walk to see my mum, I do it twice a week. So for me, it would be no thanks to a taxi, I'm walking it.

Are there really so many women out there who don't leave the house alone after dark without taking their man with them?

What if you were single? Or your husband was away?

I'd walk it. No headphones and I'd pop my phone on strava beacon to make my husband feel reassured because he'd panic about this sort of thing too but otherwise I'd be enjoying stretching my legs for 45 minutes by myself.

@Dubgirl1212

Get a taxi. A beautiful, young primary school teacher was murdered in Ireland a couple of weeks ago. She was jogging at 4pm on a route she knew and that was popular with walkers, cyclists and runners.

It's really not worth the risk.

But the risk is tiny. That is why the sad case in Ireland was such big news, because these things are not an everyday occurrence.

Women are far more likely to be killed by a partner or an ex-partner than a stranger, sadly.

@Haveyoubrushedyourteethtoday

I don’t understand why he can’t collect you, unless he is too sick to drive?

If he has covid it's currently illegal for him to leave the house.

I’d walk that happily.

The man most likely to kill you is your husband not a random stranger.

You would be statistically safer being single and living alone that living with a man even if that man picks you up from work

I wouldn't think twice about walking home at that time of night but maybe it depends where you live. I'm often baffled by the responses on threads like this which leave me wondering if some women never leave all winter!

What if you were single? Or your husband was away?

I wonder this myself. I've been single for a big chunk of my adult life, and I've now also been single since my marriage ended 6 years ago. I'd never go anywhere if I didn't walk places on my own!

@dottydodah

MissHavishamsMouldyOldCake ."Its a risk too far" Just in the last few weeks we have lost a beautiful Schoolteacher in Ireland ,Another in London in the Summer ,Poor Sarah Everard to name just a few. Of course we should be safe to walk the streets but we are obv not it seems! Just that to be safe is all

Statistically, we are no less safe than we have ever been. Anyway, as long as OP is not a “beautiful young schoolteacher” I’m sure she’ll be fine…

Why should you have to restrict your life due to male violence? Screw them and walk!

It wouldn't even occur to me to get a taxi in this situation.

If you feel safe to definitely do it.

I walk home in the dark all the time and it is very dark, there are no streetlights but a number of other people will be around. If it's pub chucking out time or later I'll get a cab but not otherwise.

I also run on my own in the countryside and walk the dog alone regularly.

I walk home from work at around 10-11.30 two nights a week it's about a 40 minute walk. My route is through a couple of long residential road and then through a huge housing estate so there is only about 5 minutes of properly dark forest area but I keep my phone away and no headphones and try to keep my wits about me but I don't think you can ever be 100% safe but at the same time real life doesn't allow for that sometimes.

It’s not the length of the walk it’s the areas you’re walking in. Busy areas I’d walk. Very poor lighting along a quiet stretch I’d be wary of for 15 minutes, never mind 45 minutes.

Its up to you, whether you feel safe or not. I walk alone in the even frequently, but I feel safe in my local area, I would not feel the same in other areas.

As long as it's not a dodgy or isolated area and it's well lit I'd definitely walk. I've been known to walk round the streets at night just to get some fresh air ie for fun! I find it quite sad when women won't walk alone after dark even in what's considered a safe area. I can understand it though if a woman has been attacked previously in such circumstances.

Taxis aren't guaranteed safe either, remember Jon Worboys? And he's not the only rapist taxi driver.
I've been sexually assaulted many times. Mostly in my childhood home by my 'D'B and the rest indoors or in broad daylight with lots of people around. Never walking through a well lit decent area at night.

I would never ever wear headphones or earplugs etc in these circumstances though because you need to know what's going on around you.

I agree with PP that an understanding of actual and perceived risk is very important.

I wouldn't think twice about walking. Except if it was cold because I hate being cold. Funny people feel safer in a city than quiet country lanes, I would feel the opposite. Guess it's what you know.

I wouldn't walk alone at 8pm for 45 minutes no.

Especially not in the dark but for a shorter time in a built up area yes.

Funnily enough there's a park near where I live with no lights at all in the middle path area - it's a short cut to the supermarket but you can also walk down some streets and avoid the park. I've done it once or twice in the dark and scared myself but the other day with a friend of mine she said no, let's not go through the park. I suppose it is being safe.