Horrified at 7month old in pizza express with screen

[MadeinSW3]

I went for lunch today at pizza express, there was a couple giving their ?7month old a bottle with a screen propped up with something Disney to watch. They then plopped baby into high chair and put something else on during whole time at the stable. How can people be so stupid! The baby was looking around elsewhere for something more interesting.

@JackieWeaverHandforthCouncil

Haven’t read thread but bet OP has a cast of thousands including sisters, parents and nanny's helping look after their own child. Poor parents in question probably have zero help and this was their one chance this week to have a conversation in ages.

Well I agree with the OP (if not her use of the word horrified) and had no such army of which you speak, just me and a not particularly engaged (now ex) husband. Funny how you make only the most positive assumptions about these 'poor parents' and the most negative about the poster, both based on no evidence whatsoever

For those looking for an alternative to screens as a distraction in restaurants, I can highly recommend a Toniebox for DC with or without additional needs. I'm not sure exactly where it would come on the Horrified of Tunbridge Wells judgement scale with some of our pps, but I suspect it would probably be lower.

@theleafandnotthetree Me too, no nannies or family at all.

But by the same token, being a parent of babies and small children means you don't get to have an uninterrupted meal

Pahahahahahaha.

No.

Just ... no.

I did not cease to be an autonomous being with my own needs just because I happened to produce children and I openly admit I dont always put my DC first because sometimes I need to put myself first. I eat my food hot and, unless someone is dying or the building is on fire, I brook no interruptions.

Perhaps, spend less time being horrified at things that have no impact on your life and learn to write in a way that is vaguely intelligible.

@Hospedia

But by the same token, being a parent of babies and small children means you don't get to have an uninterrupted meal

Pahahahahahaha.

No.

Just ... no.

I did not cease to be an autonomous being with my own needs just because I happened to produce children and I openly admit I dont always put my DC first because sometimes I need to put myself first. I eat my food hot and, unless someone is dying or the building is on fire, I brook no interruptions.

I agree. As a parent, it is OK to have needs. My basic need to eat takes priority over my child's developmental need for constant attention and interaction. They'll be OK if I don't interact with them for ten minutes. I won't be OK (and I'll be grumpy as anything!) if I don't get to eat my food.

Ridiculous at 7 months old.
Totally agree op.

@Kona84

I watched a programme on child development a couple of years ago. Maybe Channel 4- comparing babies who were using screens/iPads and those who weren’t. I watched the show thinking the screen babies are going to be so delayed in their development- nope. The iPad babies had better motor skills, balance and focus.

I have a 3 month old and I like to show her YouTube videos of ocean life- they have chilled music and it’s slow moving and the turtles just swim and she loves it - she laughs, babbles and it is often one of the only things that can calm her.
Hey bear tv is also good but I only use that for the lullabies.

That's sad, at 3 months old you can't find something to calm her that's not pixels on a screen.

Why is it "sad", exactly?

If it works, it works. Maybe the poster doesn't have access to their own private aquarium.

We live in a world of tech, that isnt going away. The children who are familiar and comfortable with it will have an advantage. I think this all tech is bad attitude isnt helpful. Surely moderation is key
A child watching a well written childrens program, that is aimed at their developmental level is still learning.
At 7 months they love repetition. thats why they will play the same game again and again and again. So you can either offer a screen with childrens nursery rhymes on which engages them or sit in Pizza express singing twinkle twinkle little star over and over and over like a demented rainbow presenter. I would pick the screen personally.
30 minutes of watching songs isnt going to harm them in the grand scheme of things. You dont have to be having a constant conversation with your child their every waking moment for them to develop social skills.
Plus you get to eat your meal while its hot and delicious, before the cheese congeals, seems like a win win to me.
No one is handing medals out for being a martyr.

Maybe they wanted to stop the child from crying and ruining everyone else’s dinner

I have plenty of calming techniques, I didn’t say it was the first thing I did or the last.
But it’s something that when she has been crying for an hour will just give me 2 mins of calm.
I bathe her, I walk her round the house showing her things talking to her, sometimes her favourite thing is to lay on her changing mat staring at a black and white picture of a cat.
But one of the things that work is watching moving fish and turtles swim calmly in the ocean, if I had a fish tank I’m sure that would calm her but I don’t.
To her the moving ‘pixel’ fish which I will add are just a blur of colour and shapes at this point are relaxing and sensory and I am pretty confident is not damaging her development - if anything the tracking of objects is progressing her development.
The wonder weeks app says leap 3 (which she has completed recently) ‘baby enjoys watching fast moving objects on tv’

Technology definitely shouldn’t be dismissed I agree it shouldn’t be relied upon, the fish are not a virtual nanny, I don’t even just ‘plonk her’ in front of it. I am holding her, swaying her, ooohhhing and ahhhing at the turtles with her.
I don’t find it sad at all it’s actually quite a fun part of my day

I’m awake now with a hungry and crying baby who slept for 3hrs the longest stretch I will get tonight - it will be hourly wake ups form now. I’m not going to play fishes to her I will preserve with the dark and feeding and shhhing her because I know at is part of her day fishes is not the right thing to do.
But through the day pushing through on 4-5hrs of broken sleep it is definitely something I will use as one of my techniques.

I’m horrified you eat in pizza express it’s crap!

Well fuck me lightly you’ll shit a brick here…my 10 week old also watches tv in the morning whilst I eat breakfast!

If it keeps the baby entertained whilst the parents eat then why not, it's the only time they get off other than reading books, playing with toys, cleaning, changing and feeding so I can understand and would never judge. When I meet people being openly vocal about not allowing any screen time makes me think that they most likely live like the Amish. We live in 2022, by the time these babies grow up, they will probably operate flying cars.

Maybe restaurants should start banning screen use - not a bad business idea - everyone locks away their phones and devices. You could have an old school paging system in case of urgent messages.

This has to be one of the most ridiculous posts on MN, actually made me laugh out loud.

What kind of fantasy world do you live in where you think it would be good business to forcibly lock peoples phones away and make them use outdated pagers during a meal. That restaurant would be shut down in weeks.

Times move on, technology evolves. I can bet when plastic toys (even worse, interactive ones like tills) first replaced wooden ones there were people Pearl clutching about them not being good for kids or traditional and parents who use them are lazy because they're not actively playing with the child but letting the child play with the toy on their own. Fgs, everything in moderation.

Shameful and there really is no excuse. Children shouldn't even see a screen till 3-4 years old.

@PatientlyWaiting21

Well fuck me lightly you’ll shit a brick here…my 10 week old also watches tv in the morning whilst I eat breakfast!

haha, I love this! my now 2yo watched TV in the mornings while I had breakfast and sorted myself out when he was about that age. lifesaver!

MN is extremely pro-screentime. The younger the better.
Children have no right to expect parents to entertain them and the parents rights to silence and passivity are paramount.
A silent child is the best kind of child.

@FOTTFSOFTFOASM @MondayYogurt

Totally agree with you both. People do seem to love boasting on MN about how feckless they are as if it’s extremely cool - the lazier you are, the better. Why should have children change your life etc etc

In reality it should and does change your life if you actually bother with parenting! It’s not being a “martyr” it’s just being a decent parent and human being 🤦🏻‍♀️☺️

@MondayYogurt

MN is extremely pro-screentime. The younger the better. Children have no right to expect parents to entertain them and the parents rights to silence and passivity are paramount. A silent child is the best kind of child.

They are if they're eating in a restaurant, I've no interest in listening to you performance parenting a screaming child.

God MN is grim.