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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

wont pay for damage to my jeans

778 replies

HRMtheQuern · 21/01/2022 12:36

I actually needed new pants, so I bought 3 new pairs of mostly otton jeans that were the same on sale from a warehouse getting rid of old stock. The jeans are all one shade of blue so any marks would be obvious. I could've got cheaper jeans but I thought I'd treat myself. They no longer have the jeans in my size but are selling them or something similar on the original website for a similar amount.

Dog of a relative unexpectedly jumped up on me and scratched as soon as I got in the door. I didn't expect them to because last times I've come in they've not done that and I've gone in loads of times. I've had these jeans 2 days. The jeans haven't been torn but are damaged. You'd have to look at them to see the scratches. other marks they've made I'm not sure if it'd come out in the wash. This has effected the aesthetic of the jeans and they don't feel as special. They haven't had holes ripped in them so relative is refusing to replace them

OP posts:
Thread gallery
14
SteakExpectations · 21/01/2022 15:18

YABU - However, you now know that MIL’s dog jumps up and can potentially spoil nice clothing, so make sure in future that you always wear this pair of jeans and don’t spoil another pair!

My dog always jumps up at my mum and so she never wears her “best” trousers when she comes over to my house.

AllThingsServeTheBeam · 21/01/2022 15:18

@stupiduser

I had this happen once, went to my DFs house and my friends huge dog jumped at me and ripped my new boots (the buckle thing ripped) she bought me a new pair straight away because it was her fault that her dog is an annoying jumping fool
The jeans aren't actually damaged. The op wants the mil to pain over double what she paid for them. There lies the difference.
Hellolittlestar · 21/01/2022 15:22

Oh dear, If I was your MIL I would make sure not to ever invite you again and avoid as much as possible. Seriously a full replacement? Ok dear. Grin

Rachie1973 · 21/01/2022 15:24

@HRMtheQuern

Right, the next person to post a passive aggresive patronising comment will be reported. Because it's largely the reason why I can't enjoy using mumsnet quite so much. I've only ever had cheap jeans not nice ones out of a sale so this was meant to be special for me but thanks a lot.
Oh I’m quivering in my Asda jeans
JohnKettleyIsAWeatherMan · 21/01/2022 15:25

Personally I don't think YABU - it's not OK for other people's pets to damage clothes or property - but as soon as I saw this was about a dog I knew which way this conversation was going to go. rolls eyes MN is so predictable sometimes.

Why should we all have to deck ourselves out in old clothes to cater to how other people's dogs may decide to behave? They should be trained not to jump up at people, simple as that. I have owned dogs myself and if I'd been the relative I'd have apologised and offered to pay.

AlDanvers · 21/01/2022 15:26

Oh I’m quivering in my Asda jeans

🤣🤣🤣

girlmom21 · 21/01/2022 15:26

but as soon as I saw this was about a dog I knew which way this conversation was going to go. rolls eyes MN is so predictable sometimes.

No this was a fun one because the dog and the MIL are on the same side Grin

SleepingStandingUp · 21/01/2022 15:27

Say someone dents your car
'oh you might be able to get that sucked out anyway'
But if Say someone dents your car
'oh you might be able to get that sucked out anyway' but if someone or their dog accidentally dents your car, and you can get it sucked out for free (aka washing jeans in a washing machine) and the end result meant you couldn't see anything and it was still as safe / function, you wouldn't get them to replace the metalwork would you?

Keke94LND · 21/01/2022 15:28

I was sat in a park the other day eating a sausage roll and a big dog jumped up, got me all muddy and got mud on my sausage roll :( cute dog though

AryaStarkWolf · 21/01/2022 15:28

I can't imagine making things awkward with my MIL over a pair of Jeans especially since by the sounds of it you were in her house where her dog lives.

JohnKettleyIsAWeatherMan · 21/01/2022 15:29

Her own dog in her own home....the dogs nails are her own business...you "walked' in, by your own admission, and likely took the dog by surprise

Entitled much? The dog's claws are absolutely other people's business too if they're causing damage. But I'm sure the OP will consider herself told and tiptoe in wearing her oldest clothes next time. Hmm

AlDanvers · 21/01/2022 15:29

@JohnKettleyIsAWeatherMan

Personally I don't think YABU - it's not OK for other people's pets to damage clothes or property - but as soon as I saw this was about a dog I knew which way this conversation was going to go. rolls eyes MN is so predictable sometimes.

Why should we all have to deck ourselves out in old clothes to cater to how other people's dogs may decide to behave? They should be trained not to jump up at people, simple as that. I have owned dogs myself and if I'd been the relative I'd have apologised and offered to pay.

The dog hasn't jumped up before. So does do this and probably has been trained.

Would you really pay £180 put for a pair of jeans, that inly cost £50? Really?

Very much doubt it.

Keke94LND · 21/01/2022 15:30

@inappropriateraspberry

I have had jeans damaged by a small dog jumping up. Their claw caught the fabric and pulled it. I didn't ask for recompense from the owner! These things happen, could have been a dog, bramble, door handle etc. You pay the money, you take the risk. Yes, it's annoying they're new, but would you ask for a replacement if they were a year old? I doubt it. If they're not ripped and are still wearable, there really is t a problem.
Hmm I kind of disagree with this, not in relation to op cause they are being unreasonable, but if a dog jumps up and genuinely rips a big hole in a piece of clothing, I would expect the owner to pay at least something for it, I don't agree with 'you spend the money you take the risk' I think it's more like 'you own the dog, you take the risk'
AllThingsServeTheBeam · 21/01/2022 15:30

@JohnKettleyIsAWeatherMan

Personally I don't think YABU - it's not OK for other people's pets to damage clothes or property - but as soon as I saw this was about a dog I knew which way this conversation was going to go. rolls eyes MN is so predictable sometimes.

Why should we all have to deck ourselves out in old clothes to cater to how other people's dogs may decide to behave? They should be trained not to jump up at people, simple as that. I have owned dogs myself and if I'd been the relative I'd have apologised and offered to pay.

Pretty simple. You're correct. Don't go round to houses with dogs if you're so dam precious!
GreenFingersWouldBeHandy · 21/01/2022 15:31

The wash cycle is done but don't have a tumble dryer and no where to hang the clothes yet

Can't see how that is anyone else's problem...

AllThingsServeTheBeam · 21/01/2022 15:31

@AlDanvers, the op only paid 18.99 it was 50 overall for 3 pairs!

betwixtlives · 21/01/2022 15:32

🤦🏾‍♀️

Cantleave · 21/01/2022 15:34

Op, I just checked on mandm via your link. The 32/31 size are showing as in stock.

For what it’s worth, there is no way that I would risk my relationship with my mil (or anyone else) over a pair of jeans that cost less than £20!

Triphazards · 21/01/2022 15:35

@lunar1

I'm looking forward to seeing the pictures of the jeans!
A diagram in Microsoft Paint is best.
Keke94LND · 21/01/2022 15:38

@DisappearingGirl

I actually think this is an interesting question about whether people should have to pay to replace stuff (irrespective of the specifics about dog and jeans).

I do think if people choose to wear really expensive stuff out and about, that's their risk to some extent.

For example, say I accidentally bumped into my friend and spilt some tea on them or something. I'm a polite person so if it couldn't be washed out I'd probably offer to pay. BUT if they said it was a designer item worth hundreds of pounds, I'd be pretty pissed off if I was expected to pay for that - I'd think it's a risk you take when wearing expensive stuff.

It is quite interesting.. I have conflicting thoughts, does it change how we feel if we take clothes out of the equation, for example, let's say in a parallel universe, you are sat on the bus with your phone out and I get on the bus with some water trip up and spill the water all over your phone and it breaks, should I buy you a new phone? (I know it's unlikely lol)
LuckySantangelo35 · 21/01/2022 15:38

But as previous poster states- why should people have to deck themselves out in cold clothes they’re not bothered about just in case dog happens to be poorly trained and jumps up??

LuckySantangelo35 · 21/01/2022 15:38

*old clothes not cold clothes

CousinKrispy · 21/01/2022 15:39

I don't think your analogy holds, OP, as the amount of damage you've described isn't really equivalent to a dent in a car.

I know some car owners would be very upset about a barely-visible mark on the car's paint as the car no longer looks perfect (which is a better analogy to the state of your jeans). But at that point IMO you have to learn to let go. As I said, wear and tear can happen from all kinds of daily life things and you just had bad luck.

You could keep demanding that your MIL replace your jeans, but I think there's also the fact that it will erode your relationship with her. Even if you aren't being overly dramatic about incredibly minor damage, sometimes you just have to be diplomatic instead of getting what's owed to you.

mumofEandE · 21/01/2022 15:40

@Spreadingtheword

Did you put the jeans on your house insurance OP? You might be able to claim.
Grin
Newtoittoo · 21/01/2022 15:40

Few things.

On the basis that: you chose to visit your MIL in her house, her dog may have left a mark (but you’re not sure) on one (out of 3) pairs of jeans you bought on an outlet site - you are happy to create a family ‘situation’.

What’s your DH view on this whole situation?

How do you normally get along with your MIL?

So effectively, you can’t enjoy MN at the moment because people are posting alternative views to the one you wanted when you made the OP?

Do you have children? If you do, I guess you can kind of ‘coerce’ MIL to do / pay for any ridiculous stuff you want.
If you don’t, I guess she might suggest that making an ordinary, usual, everyday visit to her house, where you know she has a dog, might not be in the best interest of your special wardrobe (jeans). Heaven forbid something spilled on your clothes while there - she probably can’t afford your company.

This is one instance where I would like to hear a version of the event / background from the MIL perspective. I’m sorry to say from the posts so far you sound rather hard work looking to pick a fight with MIL.