Page 12 | ‘Sorry the colour doesn’t suit my baby’

Laughingstock91 · 2022-01-21T12:07:57+00:00

Sent a friend with a new baby some clothes - one thing was a really pale pink and the other thing was a really pale yellow. It was like a T-shirt and joggers set thing that I got in a small independent shop. No Thankyou - just a comment that the colours weren’t right. The baby is 3 months old. Aibu to think I would never have dreamed of making such a comment. I had some really unusual colours but I smiled, said Thankyou & the kids wore them as I was grateful to receive gifts. I feel really offended- they weren’t cheap either 🤷🏻♀️

Lovemusic33 · 21/01/2022 15:53

Surely a 3 month old doesn’t need to be styling and colour coded every day? Most of the time they are at home and sleeping 🤔 so it’s not really important what they are wearing. I had a sicky baby and was grateful for any clothes as I was changing her after every feed.

GrapefruitPink · 21/01/2022 15:54

This year for Christmas she bought me a Hello Kitty backpack that would be for a 3-5 year old (I'm 30). I just said thank you and got on with it, I would never dream of rejecting it.

This made me giggle 🙊

thisplaceisweird · 21/01/2022 15:55

@ByeByeNye

Have people forgotten what gift giving is all about? Since when was it a thing to reject a gift?

My MIL done this one Christmas. I got her a beautiful photo frame with a photo of DC in it and she handed me the frame back as she didn't like it. I feel like she should have just took the frame and said nothing.

This year for Christmas she bought me a Hello Kitty backpack that would be for a 3-5 year old (I'm 30). I just said thank you and got on with it, I would never dream of rejecting it.

I genuinely want to know why? She's made it clear that she thinks it's ok to ask for changes to gifts that aren't to her taste, so why not do the same? There's no medal for suffering in silence. Doesn't make you polite, just resentful!

PorkPieForStarters · 21/01/2022 15:56

Does it come in adult sizes? Asking for a friend

It's a lovely gift, I'm sorry your friend was ungrateful!

HoneyFlowers · 21/01/2022 16:05

Your friend is a drama precious mother. I'd asked her to return and I'd take them back to the shop and I'd keep the money for myself.

deathofastrawberry · 21/01/2022 16:06

How rude and thoughtless of her! I would've still accepted it and said thank you. Don't bother next time!
My son is 7 months and has worn a lot of hand-me-downs from SILs baby who is 2 months older and second hand clothes from bundles we get on eBay to try and be a bit more ethical. Some of the stuff is funny and some of it ugly colours/patterns.... but he still looks cute so who cares... he's a baby not an accessory! The main thing is that he's comfortable and warm.
When a family member buys something for him I tend to overlook what the thing actually is whether it's clothes or toys, and really appreciate that they thought to get it for him. Even if it means smiling through the pain of a really noisy toy repetitively going off all day long. Thanks mum.

ThirdElephant · 21/01/2022 16:07

@PartyOnKale

That sort of outfit looks so comfortable though I really don't see how I couldn't have used that with all the changes young babies need.

It really does depend on the baby. I'd say well over half of my DD's baby clothes went unworn because she only needed one outfit a day and outgrew things fast. She was an exclusively breastfed baby who didn't spit up on herself and only pooed once a fortnight or so. 🤷 I can totally see how someone wouldn't use clothing they didn't like on a baby.

Farrandau · 21/01/2022 16:16

@ByeByeNye

Have people forgotten what gift giving is all about? Since when was it a thing to reject a gift?

My MIL done this one Christmas. I got her a beautiful photo frame with a photo of DC in it and she handed me the frame back as she didn't like it. I feel like she should have just took the frame and said nothing.

This year for Christmas she bought me a Hello Kitty backpack that would be for a 3-5 year old (I'm 30). I just said thank you and got on with it, I would never dream of rejecting it.

I think you think this is somehow admirable, or you're too timid to say something, but surely, as your MIL herself has shown that she has no problem with plain speaking about unsuitable or disliked presents, you should feel free to do the same about being given a toddler's rucksack when you're 30 (and presumably not a Hello Kitty fan?)

I don't think this makes you the 'better person'. You say people have 'forgotten what gift giving is all about' -- isn't it supposed to be 'It's the thought that counts'? Your MIL can't have given your present any thought at all if she handed her 30 year old DIL a toddler rucksack with a children's cartoon character on it.

hulahooper2 · 21/01/2022 16:21

How rude , yadnbu

katepilar · 21/01/2022 16:25

[quote Laughingstock91]@betwixtlives yes! ‘We got your parcel today. Sorry the colour doesn’t suit little xxxx. Could we change them please’[/quote]
Would this message be ok for you if it included the "thank you"?

IWasFunBeforeMum · 21/01/2022 16:26

She's a symptom of all these Instagram idiots that use their babies as accessories. How bloody rude. Unfriend her.

FrazzleDazz · 21/01/2022 16:38

I had this exact thing with my DH best friends wife this Christmas, she had already specified that her DD wanted an adidas hoodie, so I obliged...then got a text in the new year saying, DD doesn't like pink can you send it back! Had to do some severe tongue biting YANBU!

JugglingJanuary · 21/01/2022 16:41

@gingerscot

Apparently twice my aunt walked in, looked at me and said “what’s wrong with the baby, has she been at the doctor?”

They figured out the white and pale pink made me look ill. Still does. So not all babies do suit everything.

I’d rather someone told me and got a gift exchanged than waste my money 🤷‍♀️

Me too, I'd rather friends & family were honest. We can't all like the same things & some babies do look dreadful in very pale colours. I always include a gift receipt where possible.

MouseholeCat · 21/01/2022 16:44

Wow, that's rude! We have received stuff I don't like and I just snap a picture of the baby wearing the items and thank the person then donate it as we've had so many clothes given to us.

I'd probably text back and say "That's a shame, you can always donate them if you don't like the colours as they are good quality and it's a shame for them to go to waste."

I don't see why you should have to go to any effort with an adult who is this impolite.

sjxoxo · 21/01/2022 16:50

It is rude… BUT.., I’ve just had a baby 10 days ago and I’m sick of people gifting clothes. He’s recieved so many he’s not ever going to wear them all & some of them are totally impractical for a tiny baby. No baby needs polo shirts 😂 I’d rather people didn’t bother is the honest truth.. He’s got so many clothes it’s insane. I’ve already had to give some away. Everyone buys clothes - if you haven’t bought and given them by the due date don’t bother as you are too late to the clothes party! Honestly the best gifts are gift cards, frozen meals, lanolin nipple cream, nice blankets. The worst are clothes & stuffed toys. Xo

GETTINGLIKEMYMOTHER · 21/01/2022 16:50

Get them back, get refunds, and don’t give her anything else.

Is she one of those people who like to dress babies in grey to match their houses?

handroid2049 · 21/01/2022 16:51

Wow that’s a bit rude. Our babies have been given some outfits that probably wouldn’t have been my taste, but we are just grateful people have been so kind to think of us. They always wear the outfit and where possible try to send a photo of them in the gifted outfit along with a thank you card. They are babies and don’t care what they are wearing. As long as the outfit isn’t wildly inappropriate, what’s their problem?

fuckyourpronouns · 21/01/2022 16:52

@MoppaSprings

She doesn’t like the style/ colour and probably won’t put them on her child. She knows you have bought the clothes from a boutique so probably paid quite a bit for them and doesn’t want you to have wasted your money. I would much rather know that I haven’t wasted money on clothes that are worn for a 5 minute photo then passed on or binned but seems I am in the minority.

I'm with you. I'd much rather someone was honest and I exchanged them for something they would actually get use of than make some ridiculous lip service about how much they love it and then never wear it.

user33323 · 21/01/2022 16:54

@sjxoxo

It is rude… BUT.., I’ve just had a baby 10 days ago and I’m sick of people gifting clothes. He’s recieved so many he’s not ever going to wear them all & some of them are totally impractical for a tiny baby. No baby needs polo shirts 😂 I’d rather people didn’t bother is the honest truth.. He’s got so many clothes it’s insane. I’ve already had to give some away. Everyone buys clothes - if you haven’t bought and given them by the due date don’t bother as you are too late to the clothes party! Honestly the best gifts are gift cards, frozen meals, lanolin nipple cream, nice blankets. The worst are clothes & stuffed toys. Xo

I loved getting clothes for mine, even though I always had loads! I never got tired of cute baby clothes.

CorsicaDreaming · 21/01/2022 16:55

Wow 0P that is a very odd comment she made, I agree.

Would you say it is in keeping for what she is normally like, or out of character? I just wonder whether she might be suffering from postnatal depression or something else is going on?

if she is normally not like that (i.e. bitchy and/ or routinely makes bizarre comments!) Then I just wonder if something else is going on and she maybe needs some support?

EmmaH2022 · 21/01/2022 16:55

@sjxoxo

It is rude… BUT.., I’ve just had a baby 10 days ago and I’m sick of people gifting clothes. He’s recieved so many he’s not ever going to wear them all & some of them are totally impractical for a tiny baby. No baby needs polo shirts 😂 I’d rather people didn’t bother is the honest truth.. He’s got so many clothes it’s insane. I’ve already had to give some away. Everyone buys clothes - if you haven’t bought and given them by the due date don’t bother as you are too late to the clothes party! Honestly the best gifts are gift cards, frozen meals, lanolin nipple cream, nice blankets. The worst are clothes & stuffed toys. Xo

This sums up why I don't do baby gifts. I used to buy a toy, then I heard someone at work complain how many toys she got.

Just easier to buy nothing.

grey12 · 21/01/2022 16:56

My daughters have different hair colours and eye colours and they all wore most of the same clothes 🤷🏻‍♀️

MissHavishamsMouldyOldCake · 21/01/2022 16:58

Well that was very remiss of you, @grey12, not to bring them to a colour consultant who could have determined their most flattering shades.

Strawberry33 · 21/01/2022 16:58

I’d say “nothing suits your baby- not the clothes fault I think it’s just her face?” 😂

DestroyerOfHouseplants · 21/01/2022 17:00

@MollyQueenOfSocks

Friends is not only WAY PFB about this, but also stupidly ungrateful. I'd reply "Cool, send it back and i'll get a refund". Don't mention replacing it in any way and if she asks later on about a replacement just say "You didn't like it so I sorted the problem shrug "

Baby wouldn't even be in it that long, like all newborn clothes. Take it back, get your money back and don't bother replacing it OP. It's a 3 month old baby, there is no such thing as "doesn't suit" a fucking newborn!

This. Get your money back and don't replace.

If she asks for the money then be honest; I was quite offended by the way that you handled the situation before so I decided not to risk it again. All said with a bright smile.