To think it's primary school teacher's responsibility to ensure children drink during the day?

[LondonGrimmer]

Happy to be told otherwise. Child is in year 3. Frequently comes out pale, lethargic and today with stomach cramps. Transpires his full water bottle was still in his backpack so hadn't drank all day again (8.45 - 3.15) and he doesn't have a drink at lunch time either. He's an introvert who struggles with anxiety at times if that makes any difference.

Yes I have tried to explain to him the importance of staying hydrated and tell him he should try really hard to remember. I emailed the teacher last year and she said she'll try and remember to remind him (there are 23 kids in the class and one TA so I know they have their hands full).

Just frustrated and not sure if I'm being unreasonable?

YABU - your child is 7 or 8 and fully responsible for taking his water bottle out each day and remembering to drink.

YANBU - the teacher/TA should be helping more.

@londongrimmer sorry not read the full thread but I did agree with the lovely teacher saying she would help.

My daughter had similar and we ended up at the Consultant at hospital for related issues. School were great at reminding her/encouraging her to drink. This was y2. She was good till y5. Then changed schools and all the anxiety came back so not so good. BUT we didn't have such bad associated issues. She is now y7 and at secondary. She regularly restrict water at school in order to avoid the loos but is really good in the evenings now at drinking more. Good luck and keep gently reminding him.

I think the only time I have lost it with a school was them over not making sure ds2 had a drink at regular intervals. Particularly at the TA who assured me that he did not need to drink during the school day so neither should the children. I think I may have then asked whether he liked getting hit because I certainly didn't like being attacked and neither did his brother when ds2 got home dehydrated and aggressive.

In fairness he was in a special school by then and whilst I would not expect a mainstream school to monitor this unless a specific issue had been raised I did expect staff in a special school to do so when the issue had been raised repeatedly that ds2 became aggressive if he did not drink during the school day. The fact is that whilst most children of this age can recognise the sense of thirst and get themselves a drink some children can not (ds2 had an ASC diagnosis and known sensory issues). I think ds2 was well into his teenage years before he could take charge independently of keeping himself hydrated.

@Howshouldibehave

OP, your voting options and your post title are very different!

1. the teacher/TA should be helping more.

1. To think it's primary school teacher's responsibility to ensure children drink during the day?

The word ‘Responsibility’, suggests blame if the child doesn’t drink enough!

I think, that if the teacher has timetabled slots for people to have a drink plus the one lunchtime, then that is plenty.

If there are further medical needs, that is different. Is there a medical care place? Is the GP aware?

@howshouldibehave I agree with you. Unfortunately I don't think these things fully through usually, just typing on my phone whilst in a rush.

I meant that I feel teachers should in an ideal world have a culture in their school where reminders about taking a drink once or twice throughout the day was normal. Certainly not all day. I know they do it in the summer months. It was a silly suggestion of mine re counting the water bottles but again I was cooking and it was just something off the top of my head. Don't have time to perfectly curate posts sorry.

Thanks to the parents of SEN children on here for their kind and helpful advice. I wish more people would be as open minded and caring (children shouldn't need a clinical dx to access help imo).

I've spoken to the SENCO this morning at the gates as do now recognise his anxiety has heightened. Usually does as the start of term. She's going to keep an eye on him.

I put his water bottle in his hand.

I will speak to GP re stomach cramps but think now they are due to anxiety rather than lack of fluids for 7hrs.

Lastly, for those who don't know and don't want to rtft there is an option to click at the top to just view all OP's posts. That may help answer a lot of questions.

Thanks all.

@OneInEight you threatened violence against a TA?

Brocade asking someone if they like to get hit is a threat! Can you imagine ever speaking to a colleague like that.

Threads like this make me so glad I am not a teacher! I have seen schools have to issue zero tolerance letters to parents because if the abuse they are subjected to day in day out.

@sadpapercourtesan
I am guessing that you haven't been teaching very long!

@LondonGrimmer

I think it's the fact his bottle stays in his bag all day. It should be in the classroom. Not too hard to count 23 water bottles whilst doing the register, surely? (could even make it a fun job for one of the children to do).

Ok, I'll accept IABU

I really hope that's tongue in cheek!

You really think teachers have time to 'count water bottles'?!! (Grin)

I think you need to work on making your son more independent and responsible for his own basic needs.

I hope he starts to feel better soon.

I'm mid 30s and we didn't take water bottles to school to drink in class. We drank at lunch (and surely at playtime although I don't know what?)
We weren't all pale, lethargic and suffering from stomach cramps

@ldontWanna

This "back in my day" thing is irrelevant.

Back in my day there were no school lunches and barely anyone had packed lunches, and even then it would be a croissant or some type of cakey thing.

Does that mean that you'd be ok with no snack or lunch for kids too?

Really? I'm a gimmer and School lunches were excellent in my day, cooked on the premises, served on proper plates with proper cutlery rather than those moulded plastic trays which inexplicably give me the rage. Snack was an unheard of concept to be fair but I think snacking is a terrible concept for both adults and children which contributes enormously to obesity.

Does he have a friend who could remind him?

Mellowyellow222 You have missed my point entirely. I was NOT threatening to hit him. I was merely pointing out that ds2 would be very likely to hit out if he did not drink during the school day. This was easily preventable by making sure he had a drink. I was actually trying to prevent the staff getting hit.

YABU. Children (and people in general) don’t need to drink all the time. You need a drink with lunch and that’s all. I don’t like this modern habit of sipping all the time, it drives me crazy and it’s unhealthy.

@Alayalaya

YABU. Children (and people in general) don’t need to drink all the time. You need a drink with lunch and that’s all. I don’t like this modern habit of sipping all the time, it drives me crazy and it’s unhealthy.

Except this is a thread about a child who does need to drink more, otherwise it causes health problems. So your comment is neither here nor there.

In general I don’t think teachers should be responsible for making sure year 3s drink…But different children have different needs (even without diagnosed SEN). And it sounds like your son could do with some extra support in this area.

Because of the issues with dirty lunch cups and the fact that your son is a sensitive soul in general, I’d be asking for a meeting to discuss a plan of action with his teacher. It sounds like he might have some worries about drinking at school that need exploring. Even something as simple as needing the loo and not been able to go once could be enough to put him off drinking. It’s definitely worth looking into.

OP hasn’t said the child has a diagnosed medical condition which requires him to drink more. I’ve read the entire thread and can’t see any mention of a diagnosis.

"OneInEight you threatened violence against a TA?"

If you read that post properly it is pretty obvious the poster was talking about the child doing the hitting.

I haven't read the full thread so not sure if there's anything not in the OP.

At that age I would say no the child should be capable of understanding their needs.

But if there seems to be an underlying problem I would ask the teacher to prompt your child to have a drink at certain points in the day. They can't do it for everyone all day everyday but if a child needs a nudge it shouldn't be a problem.

@TolkiensFallow have you tried sending him with a squishy bottle? My now 6 year old was t drinking much and it turned out that he couldn't squeeze the bottle. We now send him in with a bottle he can squeeze. Yesterday DH sent him to school with a regular 500ml bottle (don't ask me why) and didn't drink much because he couldn't 'squish' it.

I think it’s worth another word with the teacher- maybe they reminded him a few times last time and thought the situation was resolved? They did say they would try to remind him.

I’ll be honest though, I do think this is part of ‘school readiness’ and learning independence. In most cases, reminding 7 and 8 year olds to drink probably isn’t in their best interests. It probably won’t be on the teacher’s radar at the moment, so if it’s still of concern then you need to raise it again.

As others have said, it’s not the teachers responsibility to monitor your child’s water intake.

However, I would expect them to have an interest in making sure the children are hydrated - so a general reminder at break times, lunch times etc to make sure they have a drink and explaining why it’s important is totally part of the teachers job.

However, your child does seem to have an extreme reaction and I’m not sure if it’s just because the teacher doesn’t remind him.

Does he actually like water? Does he recognise thirst? When he comes out of school, pale and listless with stomach cramps do you have to tell him to drink to fix it or does he recognise that and then drink?

Does he drink out of choice during the weekend days and holidays?

It would be worth trying to work out if it’s a school specific problem or if he genuinely doesn’t recognise thirst signals.

@Valeriekat you're guessing wrong.

I’m in my 60s - no medication - no health problems.
School from 5 to 18 - so 13 years.
Guess what we didn’t have water bottles !!! Yes no sucking all day like a baby - and our generation survived .
How ? We had a drink at morning break - (milk with lumps of ice) and water from a jug with school lunch .
As a mother you teach your son to have a drink at break and with lunch .
Get a jug for him at home and a cup or glass and teach him to pour his own drink and drink a half a cup or cup at a time . That way at school you can encourage him to drink twice at break and lunch time.
When he comes home at 3 - a drink and light snack.

@m1shap3

I'm mid 30s and we didn't take water bottles to school to drink in class. We drank at lunch (and surely at playtime although I don't know what?) We weren't all pale, lethargic and suffering from stomach cramps

I was thinking the same thing. Had a glass of milk at lunch. If I had ran around a lot during recess or pe then drank a bit of water from tap. We didn't have water bottles or nobody was worried about hydration. I'm officially at an age where I go "back in my day".

People are forgetting in the olden days we had water fountains in the playground and the corridors inside
We did

We weren't all pale, lethargic and suffering from stomach cramps

Actually some of us were, some of us needed to drink more, but didn't know why & weren't diagnosed until adulthood.

I Frequently passed out, frequently had headaches, frequently had stomach cramps. I was just a stressy child apparently.... it made school a nightmare, because I wasn't stressed & nobody friggin got it until I sussed out myself that drinking more helped

I had EDS pots & kidney trouble that I was born with, but not diagnosed in school or until much later.

Kids frequently aren't diagnosed with many things until much later. All kids need fluids & it doesn't have to be water, whatever school might say to perform at their best, that's just biology, some kids need it much more.

My DD like me is one of them & I'm so glad things have changed since I was a kid & she doesn't need to go through what I did

& teachers DO help if asked in these circumstances & you can legally give them squash if they won't drink water. Mine had diluted fruit juice

Not only are YABU but he seems like his health is being strangely affected by no water. As a rule a child having a morning drink, breakfast and lunch (food is also a source of water) should not be having such dramatic symptoms by avoiding water during that part of the day.