Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think it's primary school teacher's responsibility to ensure children drink during the day?

352 replies

LondonGrimmer · 17/01/2022 16:38

Happy to be told otherwise. Child is in year 3. Frequently comes out pale, lethargic and today with stomach cramps. Transpires his full water bottle was still in his backpack so hadn't drank all day again (8.45 - 3.15) and he doesn't have a drink at lunch time either. He's an introvert who struggles with anxiety at times if that makes any difference.

Yes I have tried to explain to him the importance of staying hydrated and tell him he should try really hard to remember. I emailed the teacher last year and she said she'll try and remember to remind him (there are 23 kids in the class and one TA so I know they have their hands full).

Just frustrated and not sure if I'm being unreasonable?

YABU - your child is 7 or 8 and fully responsible for taking his water bottle out each day and remembering to drink.

YANBU - the teacher/TA should be helping more.

OP posts:
EarringsandLipstick · 17/01/2022 16:53

He has school dinners. Doesn't drink the water in the hall as he and his brother say the cups are always dirty.

Really? They sound very sensitive. Honestly, they need to get over this. Or if the cups are that dirty, take it up with the school.

sadpapercourtesan · 17/01/2022 16:53

You're not being unreasonable, especially as the teacher had agreed to remind him. There is a vocal minority on MN who jump on every thread about teachers to squawk about "teachers are there to TEACH, nothing else". I don't think they are teachers. They haven't thought through how that would actually work with, small children in your care all day. Confused

MeredithGreyishblue · 17/01/2022 16:54

I was expecting a reception age. By y3 I think they can manage themselves.

Why doesn't he have a drink with lunch?

It's worth asking the teacher because it is odd that he doesn't and maybe there's a reason.

After a consistently reliable DS1 in primary, DS2 has shown me that schools do miss some things and it's worth investigating. You can ask without making a fuss.

DemBonesDemBones · 17/01/2022 16:54

Unless SEN no, the teacher cannot possibly make sure all children are adequately hydrating.

sadpapercourtesan · 17/01/2022 16:55

It's also disgusting to expect children to drink out of dirty cups. You wouldn't expect adults to put up with that (or if you would, you're a bit strange).

Original poster
LondonGrimmer · 17/01/2022 16:55

@sadpapercourtesan

I'm a primary teacher, and if a parent of a child with anxiety issues had asked me to make sure her son had a drink during the day, I would do so.

I dislike the encroaching idea that teachers are there purely to attend to academic matters and have no caring role whatsoever - that's dangerous, with young children. The teacher is in loco parentis. There are, of course, limits - I won't generally agree to things like "can you make sure she doesn't lose her new pink pencil" - but basic care, like a child with known shyness/anxiety and a history of mutism not speaking up when he's thirsty, then that is absolutely part of the teacher's role. Children build up self-care skills gradually and at different rates, and the adults around them need to support and scaffold those developing skills - that's part of education at this age.

Love this! Couldn't agree more. When I look after friend's children then I always make sure they have enough to eat and drink. You sound so caring and thoughtful and your pupils are lucky to have you Smile
OP posts:
MooseBreath · 17/01/2022 16:55

YABU. A 7-8 year old should be responsible for their own hydration for the (presumably) 6 hours they are at school. This is an issue you need to tackle at home by putting the water bottle in his hand and by talking to him about his anxieties.

Babysteadygo · 17/01/2022 16:58

I teach year 3 and if a parent asked me to remind a child I would do.

Mind you they seem to drink plenty anyway followed by constant requests for the loo.

WTGN · 17/01/2022 16:58

YABU. My child is 8 and knows when they need to drink and is capable without being prompted.
Also, 25-30 years ago when I was in primary school we didn't take bottles of water for the class. We got out drink at lunch time and that was it. We survived? 🤷🏻‍♀️

oatlattetogo · 17/01/2022 16:59

Having seen your updates I agree with you actually.

Would a compromise be that the teacher or TA goes with him in the morning to get his bottle out of his bag, or quietly encourages him to go and get it during registration time? Then at least it’s in the classroom with him, which is a step in the right direction! Would he be more inclined to drink squash? If he had an opaque bottle (if they’re allowed) then nobody would know.

Original poster
LondonGrimmer · 17/01/2022 16:59

@EarringsandLipstick

He has school dinners. Doesn't drink the water in the hall as he and his brother say the cups are always dirty.

Really? They sound very sensitive. Honestly, they need to get over this. Or if the cups are that dirty, take it up with the school.

He is very sensitive - one of his best qualities and one the ones I'm most proud of Star
OP posts:
Original poster
LondonGrimmer · 17/01/2022 17:01

@HavfrueDenizKisi

Really? You have to be kidding. Teachers are there to teach. They already do a whole heap of pastoral care. Now they need to help your pfb remember that he is thirsty? I've heard it all now.
They are definitely there to do a whole lot more than teach! Care, support, inspire, role model, encourage are some off the top off my head.

Oh, and he's my psb actually (and I have older step children).

OP posts:
SheWoreYellow · 17/01/2022 17:01

If you were to send him in with his water bottle in his hand rather than his bag, would there be a better chance of it making it into the classroom?

sadpapercourtesan · 17/01/2022 17:01

@WTGN

YABU. My child is 8 and knows when they need to drink and is capable without being prompted. Also, 25-30 years ago when I was in primary school we didn't take bottles of water for the class. We got out drink at lunch time and that was it. We survived? 🤷🏻‍♀️
Many of us got smacked around, humiliated, given our marks publicly, told to suck up bullying, made to eat food we didn't want... what is the relevance here? Best practice has changed, thankfully. It isn't a race to the bottom, and children deserve better than the bare minimum of care.
cookiemonster2468 · 17/01/2022 17:03

I don't understand why he's not having a drink at lunch time?

If he's on school dinners then they should give him a drink, and if he's on packed lunches just chuck a juice box or a small flask inside his lunch box so it's there without him having to check his backpack.

Original poster
LondonGrimmer · 17/01/2022 17:04

@WTGN

YABU. My child is 8 and knows when they need to drink and is capable without being prompted. Also, 25-30 years ago when I was in primary school we didn't take bottles of water for the class. We got out drink at lunch time and that was it. We survived? 🤷🏻‍♀️
Lots has change in 25-30 years largely thanks to the huge developments in neuroscience and how that affects child development. Lots of things happened back then that have changed. It's called progress.

That's great your 8yo remembers but we are all different and grow at different paces.

OP posts:
Babysteadygo · 17/01/2022 17:05

@WTGN

Unbelievable to think in my day it was a drink and playtime and dinner time

BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz · 17/01/2022 17:05

Dint send him in with it in his bag. Make him carry it in his hand. He will then put it on his desk.

mmgirish · 17/01/2022 17:05

I remind my class throughout the day to drink their water. I don't monitor it though. I don't have time. I also never count the water bottles. I definitely don't have time for that.

BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz · 17/01/2022 17:05

[quote Babysteadygo]@WTGN

Unbelievable to think in my day it was a drink and playtime and dinner time[/quote]
And me

TyrannosaurusRegina · 17/01/2022 17:06

Bit of an aside but is children taking water bottles into school and drinking throughout the day a recent thing? When I was at primary, we got a glass of water with our lunch and that was it.

Babysteadygo · 17/01/2022 17:06

@LondonGrimmer
Sorry not read all thread, has the teacher said they won’t remind your child to have a drink ?

fairylightsandwaxmelts · 17/01/2022 17:06

YANBU. I'm not a fan of this trend that says teacher are only responsible for academics.

When I was in primary school, we were encouraged to have a drink before every break and before we went to lunch. It takes two minutes to remind children to have a drink before they go out to play or between lessons.

Original poster
LondonGrimmer · 17/01/2022 17:07

@SheWoreYellow

If you were to send him in with his water bottle in his hand rather than his bag, would there be a better chance of it making it into the classroom?
Yes! Thanks to everyone for this (really rather obvious now you mention it!) suggestion - will definitely be doing that from tomorrow! I think if it's in his line of sight he'll have better chance of remembering Smile

Obviously this wouldn't be an issue if he wasn't affected by not drinking for 7hrs a day (Inc travel T to/from school) but he is lethargic and has stomach cramps which dissipate with a drink so he clearly is.

OP posts:
Babysteadygo · 17/01/2022 17:07

@BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz

Then again it was PE in bare feet if we forgot

Swipe left for the next trending thread