To leave baby alone in the car?

[irishfarmer]

Please don't slate me for this!

I am currently pregnant with DC no 1. Is it safe/ normal to leave a baby alone in a car while going into the shop? Not for long, e.g. if you have filled with car with diesel and are going into pay? Or you've stopped at the local shop to go in for milk and bread, baby is asleep and you won't be longer than 5 mins. I'm not talking about stopping off at the shopping centre and going in for an hour.

My DH said he doesn't think so. I said yes. I minded nieces/ nephews all my life and when I learnt to drive I often had to bring them places. I remember leaving them in the car, really at any age to go into the shop for 2 mins. The car was locked and this was over 10 years ago so things might have changed. In fact I remember them being left outside in cars by their own parent if they were asleep when visiting the home house. Granted I grew up in a cul-de-sac which is very quiet and have known all of those neighbours my entire life.

Honestly what is the done thing these days? If it makes a difference I live now outside a small town (approx 1,500 ppl) it is a farming/ agricultural community.

@SantaClawsServiette

Thank you!!

[quote LadyFannyButton]Never left mine in the car.

www.spaldingvoice.co.uk/car-catches-fire-on-petrol-station-forecourt/

www.bbc.co.uk/news/av/uk-england-kent-19338012

www.manchestereveningnews.co.uk/news/greater-manchester-news/car-bursts-flames-just-inches-13326631

www.bristolpost.co.uk/news/bristol-news/taxi-catches-fire-esso-petrol-1848437[/quote]
Are you thinking the car burst into flames because the parent wasn't in the car? Or it would be better if the parent was also in the fire?

I wouldn’t and it doesn’t seem to be the done thing now either. Pay at pump, or just deal with having to lift the car seat out if they’re asleep. For stuff like a pint of milk it was far easier to walk with them in the pram than faff about with getting them in and out of the car.

@Warblerinwinter Yes true but what about if you lose your key? Or the lock is jammed and the fob won't work! (has happened to me before)
It's not that far fetched and in terms of risk versus benefit to me, it isn't worth it.
Everyone has their own view - my view is based on working with hundreds of families and hearing a wide range of awful scenarios, some of which were pure freak accidents.

Also, god forbid you nip out to pay and something happens to you and no one knows your baby is in the car! Is it worth it then, most likely not.

Also, for those talking about leaving a baby in a car outside in a safe area...true story and believe me or not, but I worked with a lady who left her baby in the car as they were having a nap and she didn't want to wake, went in to have a cuppa and had her first ever epileptic fit, smacked her head and partner found her knocked out on floor, baby (safe thank goodness) in the car, and luckily he was due home not long after she'd got back from being out with baby. I know that if would be bad still if baby was in the house but at least they'd be inside with you and not at risk from being in the car/car seat/car theft/worse crimes etc.

My view may seem extreme but I've seen some horrific things and I am quite risk averse as a result

[quote LadyFannyButton]Never left mine in the car.

www.spaldingvoice.co.uk/car-catches-fire-on-petrol-station-forecourt/

www.bbc.co.uk/news/av/uk-england-kent-19338012

www.manchestereveningnews.co.uk/news/greater-manchester-news/car-bursts-flames-just-inches-13326631

www.bristolpost.co.uk/news/bristol-news/taxi-catches-fire-esso-petrol-1848437[/quote]
Cars catch fire all the time. It’s only NEWS because it’s on a petrol station car park which is obviously more dangerous than in a land somewhere surrounded by grass..

I use to leave the baby in the car for petrol. Then our local one blew up!
We are rural so not many around. These days i even worry someone will pinch my dog. Best to stick to pay at the pump.

I mean, while it's normal i the UK to not leave kids out because of safety, I think it's worth acknowledging that this is a relatively recent phenomena. Lots of us here will have been left as kids. There are still countries in Europe where it is perfectly normal to leave prams outside shops with sleeping babies.

The biggest danger is really social disapproval.

@Babyvenusplant

I would never leave my baby in the car for any reason

Small children are much safer in the car than walking across the forecourt in a busy petrol station.

I’d be worried about the baby choking or getting into difficulties with breathing in the car seat (which does happen and very quickly too). No way would I do that

Would you leave a million pounds on the backseat? No? Don't leave your priceless baby then.

@deaexmachina

Would you leave a million pounds on the backseat? No? Don't leave your priceless baby then.

I think you'll find that thieves are generally more interested in cash than parental responsibility

I find getting babies / kids in and out of car seats a massive hassle so I try and limit any shop visits etc with them.

The only time I do occasionally leave them is garage forecourt but I would rather not and do try to avoid it.

Just try to work around it - get shopping delivered, go without the baby if possible, or do smaller shops walking with pram
instead of driving.

I don't leave mine in the car when I get petrol and actually, I've noticed parents with similar aged kids also bringing them in when they go to pay.

The only time I think it might be OK and I've seen parents doing it, is when they're parked near the ticket machine in a carpark and they go to buy their ticket. I don't do this though as there's always a queue. I can imagine if you had twin toddlers or a toddler who bolted, the odds are they'd be safer in the car

@MysticPeg1

I personally wouldn't on any of those things, I take DD in with me when I pay for petrol, I just would never forgive myself if something happened to her. It's not worth it, just take the car seat with you.

Do you realise you are statistically way more likely to get mown over whilst carrying them by a distracted driver pulling away from a pump than your ca4 being stolen whilst locked or spontaneously combusting right? I go as far as to say you’re actually putting your baby in danger wandering across a busy forecourt carrying them!

Petrol stations yes, convenience stores where baby is asleep right outside and you are just in the grab an item quickly is OK.

Not OK is leaving baby asleep in a carpark where you have no visibility. It is neglect and if a passer by finds an "abandoned" baby, is likely to call the police!

@Umbella

A lot of petrol stations now allow you to pay with an app.

Do they?! Where do you live. Im in a big city and not seen that! Sounds really handy

@RobinPenguins

I wouldn’t and it doesn’t seem to be the done thing now either. Pay at pump, or just deal with having to lift the car seat out if they’re asleep. For stuff like a pint of milk it was far easier to walk with them in the pram than faff about with getting them in and out of the car.

Unless like me you live rurally and a 6 mile walk down national speed limit roads without pavements!

Petrol =yes
Shop=never

I wouldn't do it in any situation. If i couldn't pay at pump I'd take baby in with me. In theory if you can see them the whole time and it's for 2 minutes it should be fine. But my mind goes to the worst. What if they're.crying for you and the person in front takes ages and you're 10 minutes not 2. What if someone got into your car...would you get there quick enough? What if God forbid someone crashed into the car...all unlikely but for me it isn't worth the risk

Unless like me you live rurally and a 6 mile walk down national speed limit roads without pavements!

In that case I imagine I’d plan my food/drink shopping a lot better than I currently do because a 6 mile drive for a pint of milk would be a bit much.

Those saying it is easier to go to the local shop with the pram, in general I 100% agree. I grew up in town about 400m from the shop so if I was minding a niece/ nephew I would put them in the buggy or let them walk. I live about 3 miles to the nearest shop now. My own road is very quiet and I hope to do walks with the baby but the rest of the main road once you come off our road in is a lot busier so I don't think I'd walk.

I'm quite relaxed generally but found I couldn't do this with DD. I left her once in full view to collect an order from a shop while she was asleep (car was parked outside) and I fretted the whole 30 seconds

Not a tiny baby but from toddlerhood up yes I did/do this on occasion. I try to avoid it so it's rare but I still do it. Just when paying for petrol or taking money out of an atm or something along those lines and only in certain places - usually my village shop. I wouldn't do it in my large hometown or any city but yes in rural low crime areas when you're parked outside the door and literally going in for a minute or two and the car door is locked it's fine.

@SantaClawsServiette

I mean, while it's normal i the UK to not leave kids out because of safety, I think it's worth acknowledging that this is a relatively recent phenomena. Lots of us here will have been left as kids. There are still countries in Europe where it is perfectly normal to leave prams outside shops with sleeping babies.

The biggest danger is really social disapproval.

@SantaClawsServiette I think I saw something about this being normal in Norway/ Sweden, even in the snow. The lady in the video said the babies are well wrapped up and the air is good for them.

I'm in Ireland (ROI). But I've lived in England and Scotland and find a lot of our social norms are pretty similar. Didn't find the Aussies massively different either.

[quote LadyFannyButton]Never left mine in the car.

www.spaldingvoice.co.uk/car-catches-fire-on-petrol-station-forecourt/

www.bbc.co.uk/news/av/uk-england-kent-19338012

www.manchestereveningnews.co.uk/news/greater-manchester-news/car-bursts-flames-just-inches-13326631

www.bristolpost.co.uk/news/bristol-news/taxi-catches-fire-esso-petrol-1848437[/quote]
The story isn't clear enough on your 4th link but none of he others involve unattended vehicles and no third party cars In fact the drivers were in them at the time, the logical conclusion to draw here would be that you should never drive your car surely