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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

6yo Birthday presents, who is being unreasonable?

219 replies

hollyisKey · 17/01/2022 06:51

Ds will be 6 next month and me and dp decided to get him a nice bike. The bike cost £190 and that is more than we would usually spend on birthdays.

Dp thinks that the bike will be all ds needs for his birthday. Since we have just had Christmas he doesn't need any toys, shoes or clothes.

I however, think that ds should have a couple of little presents to open too. Nothing really expensive but just so he gets to unwrap something.

We are no means rich but could afford an extra £30 - £40 for some extra presents. Dp is mostly concerned about the lack of space in our house. He saw getting the bike as one big gift and no smaller items to clutter the house with.

Aibu or is dp?
Thanks

OP posts:
Looubylou · 17/01/2022 07:57

Some of those little flashing strap on lights. Those little light things that attach to spokes?, A bell. Something light reflective (arm band etc). Bike gloves.

Lostinafield · 17/01/2022 07:59

I would definitely get him.some other stuff. As you say, it's not about the cost. A bike is great but what if it snows/rains heavily on the day and he can't go out on it? Could you get him a lego set too?

Emerald5hamrock · 17/01/2022 08:00

A bike is great but it's an essential present for development, I'd buy him a small gift too.

lioncitygirl · 17/01/2022 08:01

What about a helmet, some protective pads, pjs, books? Things he will need etc? X

Lockdownbear · 17/01/2022 08:03

I'd maybe wrap a new helmet, and couple of smaller things book, sweets, character hoody but I wouldn't blow another £30-40 on stuff he doesn't need esp if he'll get gifts from family too.

MajorCarolDanvers · 17/01/2022 08:03

A few little things would do. No need to spend £30-£40.

MajorCarolDanvers · 17/01/2022 08:03

A few little things would do. No need to spend £30-£40.

horseymum · 17/01/2022 08:06

A bike is fine, a great present. It also doesn't have to set a precedent for how much you spend, our kids understand that some years, one of them will get a bike, doesn't mean that that much will be spent every time. Also second hand bikes are great too, especially when they are still growing, mine get better quality ones because they are happy to have second hand. I hope you have lots of fun together with it. Maybe you have a pump track or similar nearby you can go to?

Gilly12345 · 17/01/2022 08:20

The bike and a new helmet (if he needs one) is fine, a few presents to open is ok but we have just had Christmas so I wouldn’t buy things for the sake of it, hopefully he will presents from family members, hopefully you are having a tea party for him with close family members?

HerbivorousRex · 17/01/2022 08:22

I’d probably get a few things to unwrap (especially because in January/February it might be too cold or wet for him to actually be able to use it straight away). I also totally understand what your DP is saying about not wanting more clutter so I’d go for:

  • Consumable items (craft supplies, fun bath products, sweets or chocolates).
  • A small activity item (book, puzzle/game, craft or baking kit).
  • A nice version of something he’ll need anyway (e.g. favourite character pyjamas, lunchbox, water bottle etc).
  • A voucher for a day out (my mum once gave me a note saying that I was getting dance lessons in a a sticker book about ballerinas. My brother got a trip to the zoo attached to a ‘sponsor an animal’ pack).
  • Bits and pieces to go with the bike (he’ll probably need a bell, lights and helmet anyway so it’s not really extra clutter, and things like streamers, a basket or wheel reflectors will be attached to the bike so won’t take up extra space).
aSofaNearYou · 17/01/2022 08:28

Personally I would just get him the bike, I think it's normal for big presents to be the only one. But there's no right or wrong. Why not just chocolate/books, something other than toys if you really want to get him something else?

preperri · 17/01/2022 08:28

I think taking him to a nice place to use his new bike and maybe an icecream would be a good present as it's a day out

But there's no need to waste £30-40 on presents he doesn't need or wont appreciate

GeorgieTheGorgeousGoat · 17/01/2022 08:37

@ManicPixie

A bike for a 6 month old seems an odd choice to me but I guess he’s unusually mobile? I feel like it wasn’t until a lot later mine could have used that.

I would say that “you’ve just had Christmas” is an unfair excuse given he’ll have ‘just had Christmas’ for the rest of his life…

And I'm guessing it won't be his birthday just after Christmas if he's only 6 months old Grin
justasking111 · 17/01/2022 08:44

Ours love fancy dress costume

LovelyMoans · 17/01/2022 08:48

This thread amazes me

DS had a bike for his birthday and was thrilled with it. No extras, family weren't there on the day so all he had that day was the bike& a packet of sweets "from his baby sister". Kids aren't born thinking a huge pile of tat presents are required on birthdays, they learn that when it happens.

Spitspatspot · 17/01/2022 08:56

Does he know about the bike? If not, how about doing a simple ‘treasure hunt’ with brightly coloured envelopes to open for the clues leading to his bran new bike?

Pbbananabagel · 17/01/2022 08:57

If the Bike is the only present, make receiving it completely momentous - wrap the entire thing so it’s still got to be unwrapped even though it’s obvious what it is, tie a massive bow around it with a super long tail all the way from outside/the garage up to your 6 year old’s bedroom and give him the end with a gift tag saying “come and find me!” When you wake him up

Looubylou · 17/01/2022 09:05

Pbbananabagel- yes this, I've wrapped a bike before - was well received. Long ribbon is fab idea.

GAW19 · 17/01/2022 09:14

Does he like craft stuff? Books, pencils, glue, stickers? Wrap it all separately. Tbh if you get craft stuff you could buy a lot even for just £10 Smile

Christmas1988 · 17/01/2022 09:17

I’d get him a few little bits to open, bike bell, helmet, bike gloves, book or a small Lego set. It will be a bit underwhelming for a six year old to just receive a bike.

ItoldyouIwastrouble · 17/01/2022 09:31

A treasure trail with something like a chocolate bar to unwrap at each point with the next clue inside, the helmet being the penultimate clue/present and the bike at the end.

Tal45 · 17/01/2022 09:35

Can you compromise and instead of spending £30-40 spend £20. I don't think you need to spend more money but I think kids love to have a few bits to unwrap. Consider second hand books/games have a look at the charity shop and see what you could pick up there or on ebay, wrap up any bits to go with the bike like the helmet, some of those things to go on the spokes maybe, some clothing, chocolate......so many options.

RamblinBoy · 17/01/2022 09:36

We're in exactly the same position with our DS who is getting one big expensive present for his 6th birthday in a few weeks. We've also got him a dressing gown, some books, bath bomb thingy and card game. I think it's nice for him to have a little pile to open.

Like a PP suggested a treasure trail is a good idea, we did one last year. He followed the clues all round the house and LOVED it.

Hope he has a fantastic birthday Smile

TheChemicalMother · 17/01/2022 09:37

There are loads of small inexpensive things that 6 year olds love!

Little magnet sets, ‘magic’ holographic money box, exciting chocs, a book. Almost like a birthday stocking.

BlowDryRat · 17/01/2022 09:38

Wrap up a helmet and lights?