AIBU- Fellow school mum drives every morning

[Mybumlooksbig]

So..hope this doesn't out me.
We live in a very small close knit area. All kids attend the same school, lots of us live on the same few streets.
Every morning and pick up we ALL walk the kids to school, bar the few who have to rush off to work etc (it's a 5-10 min walk)
One parent on my street... drives! Big 4x4, she has NEVER once walked her DS.
She doesn't work, no where to rush off to. She has no mobility issues etc neither does the child..
Why does this iritate me so much??

Yabu- live and let live
Yanbu- she should be walking

Look at all of the excuses being used for driving less than a mile twice a day, every day. Its kind of pathetic.

Excuses? Or you mean genuine reasons some posters have shared as to why she might be driving. Or do you consider all those reasons to be excuses and obviously those posters are also capable of walking instead of driving?

Additionally she doesn't need a fucking excuse she's a grown women driving a car, she's not on trial being cross examined by the OP.

You can't possibly know why she drives to school. It might be laziness, lack of thought or some private medical issue or mental health issue. It's irrational to get wound up by one individual making a choice you don't like.

If the environment is your concern, then voicing your dislike and public judgement of specific individual people you perceive to be making poor choices is not likely to persuade or encourage her or others to make different choices. If you genuinely wanted to reduce the numbers of cars on the road, you could be working with the school and the PTA on initiatives to reduce car use on the school run. You could organise a walking bus for example, that conveniently goes past her house.

@ImaginaryCat

I'm really surprised by the number of people on this thread who seem to think driving such a short distance to school is fine. We have an environmental issue exacerbated by car usage. We have a childhood obesity problem and a generation of kids who don't exercise enough. Roads around schools are fucking death traps, with regular near misses. How on this bloody planet are so many of you this blasé about people driving 3 streets to drop kids at school!!!!! I'm with you OP. The parents who do it at our village primary are dickheads. And don't try telling me they've all got hidden disabilities, because that would mean NHS statistics are totally out of synch with my area!

I agree with the general sentiment of this.

But as someone else further down the thread said, you cannot transpose universal issues to the individual.

We simply don't know why this woman is driving, there could actually be a perfectly good reason.

If she's a lazy naff twat, I judge her. People who drive when they could reasonably walk, are irredeemably naff. But we don't know she's a lazy naff twat, so the OP is being completely unreasonable.

@Doidontimmm

How do you know her medical details?

This ^

Perhaps she needs to use the car anyone. Maybe she's off to see a relative she helps care for or off to the supermarket.

Literally none of your business

[quote FreedomFaith]@EarringsandLipstick

Yeah it is. Look at all of the excuses being used for driving less than a mile twice a day, every day. Its kind of pathetic. If everyone cannot make small changes, you sure as hell can make the actual drastic changes that are necessary to stop climate change. Small changes are easy, and we can't even do them.[/quote]
I agree with you re walking, personally. I choose to walk as much as I can. My DC too

But there are other small changes. People could be driving and making those changes.

You are being completely ridiculous.

My neighbour was like this. She had agoraphobia and other mental health issues you would guess at.
So yabu. You really don't know whats going on. Or maybe she just doesn't like you and its her way of not spending time with you!

No it’s because many on here will claim they are concerned about climate change but don’t want to make changes themselves

It’s for other to do

Read the threads on the ownership of 4x4 justifications it’s hilarious

Wouldn't guess at

I’ve no idea, weird though, as it sounds like you’d be a daily treat to walk with

Wow. Usually if I see a thread that annoys me I just leave it without commenting but I cannot believe the judgement from you.

Honestly who gives a fuck if she drives, she's probably avoiding you and your cronies!

Is this what I have to look forward to once I start doing school runs?

I'd ask yourself a few questions, OP.

• do you have a nice group of friends who are actually supportive or are you surrounded by friends/other school mums who are actually judgemental bitches who can't say a nice word about anyone else and will talk about everyone else behind their backs?
• do you have any meaningful things to spend your time on to keep yourself busy and occupied in a positive way?

FWIW my house backs onto a primary school so I am planning on walking my soon to be born child there but I certainly won't care how far someone else drives to drop their own kid off...

How do you know she isn’t disabled and how do you know she doesn’t have anywhere to rush off to? Why do you know everything about everyone in the school? You really need to get a life.

Ah people may say the same about me. Sometimes we walk the 10 minutes to school, but other times my chronic back injury is so bad I can hardly walk from the car park to school, let alone any further.

I don't talk about it to other people because it's variable, sometimes I'm fine, sometimes I'm not. It's also no one else's business and I'm not interested in judgement or "advice" from other parents who I hardly know.

It's not great from an environmental perspective, but it's also not great for me to exacerbate my back, go off work sick, lose my job/house etc.

There's also a group of mums that I would actively avoid walking to school with as they are really quite bitchy about others.

Mind your own business OP

Maybe she doesn’t want to walk with your mum troop, maybe she has social anxiety, maybe she doesn’t want to get her hair messed up, maybe she likes driving…

@OhWhyNot

Would annoy me too

I live in London the number of 4x4 cars at ds school is ridiculous yet so many championed the schools project on climate change

If they weren't 4x4, would you care so much?

YANNU. Annoys me too. We have a similar set up round here. I think polluting the environment for no good reason and putting kids at risk by parking right outside the school gives me a right to be peeved. And it's not mobility issues - the mums who do it then go off to the gym and a swim at 10am.

@OhWhyNot

No it’s because many on here will claim they are concerned about climate change but don’t want to make changes themselves

It’s for other to do

Read the threads on the ownership of 4x4 justifications it’s hilarious

Like I said, there are lots of changes people can make. One action around driving cannot be used as a rule for all their decisions around climate change.

Hahahaha I think you are my neighbour.

My DC is a school refuser. Driving there means they get there and stay (mostly).

Enjoy your ignorant judging.

It took me 15 mins to get dd home from the bus stop yesterday that is 2 mins walk from our house at the end of the road, as she refused to move, she’s 10 almost 11 so I can’t physically force her and even if I did she gets aggressive, like I said she has asd, you literally have no idea as I don’t tell any of my neighbours, hate judgmental people like the op, I had two women a few years Back gossiping about “lazy mums” who get on the bus to take their kids to school when they should be walking they spent the whole journey loudly talking about how terrible it was, when they have no idea of why we get the bus.

@BiggestJulie- Many local schools are on main streets. Diverting all traffic through quiet neighborhoods with narrow streets would be disastrous and cause more congestion. Living without a car if you have a commute can be rather difficult. Mind your own business about one woman driving to school. Nagging rarely changes behavior.

Given that this is MN, OP, where nobody can ever just be lazy - it’ll be a case of hidden disability/MH issues, may I suggest that the woman has a crippling case of walking-phobia.
And very likely severe anxiety about leaving her SUV at home, in case anything happens to it - bird poo on the windscreen, etc.

Its none of your business.

@EarringsandLipstick

Sorry you might think that, but you can't just walk every day to offset 4 holidays abroad, for example. It's not just one change that needs made, it's loads of changes.

We need to stop using cars at all really.
Stop eating meat.
Stop transporting food in from abroad.
Stop having loads of kids, two max.
Stop the production of plastic and anything that isn't absolutely essential.
Stop having holidays abroad at all.

We are too far gone to make small changes and hope for the best. But those changes above will never happen. Ever. As proven by this thread.

Yes if I knew they lived closely which I know many of them did

4x4 are a fashion statement for the vast majority

Hopefully shall pass soon but in there mean time we shall read on mn where I know they are extremely popular we shall read the justifications for having one

Maybe she doesn't like forced socializing.