Are these reasonable requests?

[Kaandii]

Background...
long distance relationship for 5 months, we video call daily, we had an argument and this is what he text after I blocked him on Facebook

I LOVE YOU VERY MUCH AND YOU ARE THE LOVE OF MY LIFE. BUT FOR US TO BE IN A HAPPY HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP, THESE THINGS ARE VERY IMPORTANT, IN ADDITION TO THE THINGS WE'VE TALKED ABOUT AT THE VERY BEGINNING OF THIS. HONESTY, OPENNESS, TRUST, RESPECT, EQUALITY.

YOU SHOULD BE WILLING TO DO THESE:

* I WANT ALL THE PROMISES YOU'VE EVER GIVEN ME TO BE KEPT. YOU CAN'T EVER TAKE THEM BACK UNDER ANY CIRCUSMTANCES

1. I wanna be unblocked and added on facebook (And need to be given the guarantee that such thing would never happen again on facebook or anywhere)

2. I would like any pics of you taken with other men removed from facebook. (If you wanna keep (CHILD) dads pics for (CHILD) you can have them privately somewhere, not on facebook for everybody to see). I can't understand why you insist on publicly displaying pics of him I don't need to explain to you how much it hurts me.

3. You have to work on controlling your anger. I will not tolerate you saying mean and abusive things to me. Remember how it made you feel when it was done to you.

4. You should tell your doctor everything. You might need treatment for more than depression

5. I should be able to ask you anything and you should be able to answer without getting mad and getting all defensive.

6. You need to stop trying to dictate me what to do. I've been putting up with that only because I love you very much, not because I am scared of you or you can control me. We are equal in this relationship so we would decide things together while showing mutual respect.

7. We need to be able to communicate under all circumstances. You need to answer the phone whenever I call. Communication is the key to everything.

I am certainly wanting to make this work. We have put in so much effort, time, feelings into this I don't want it all to go to a waste. I really don't want (CHILD) to think that I abandoned him too. I really wanna be around for him too. I hope this is how you feel too. I love you very much honey. I want us to be happy together forever.

Are his requests reasonable?

He sounds crazy.

Keep him blocked and be careful who you introduce to your child next time.

5 months? Long distance? He's acting like a crazed stalker not a boyfriend. Why is he even talking about your ex and your child? It's none of his business. The rest is scary controlling nonsense.

I'd respond once to tell him that the relationship is over and not to contact you again. Then block on everything you can and ignore any direct messaging, calls, emails etc.

Not seen previous thread, but be glad it’s long distance. Dump and block. Maybe keep a diary in case he starts doing creepy stalker stuff (to help with police report)

This is not okay. You're well rid.

Run a mile away from this as fast as you can!

This sounds a nightmare, and not what you need from a relationship.

Run!!!!!

NOOOOO

Block him on everything.

After you've told him to fuck off & NEVER get in contact with you again.

Number 4 is a red flag that we got taught about on the freedom program. As is number 7, if you carry on with this relationship you will probably have to answer it in a certain amount of rings.

Interesting that he says this

You need to stop trying to dictate me what to do

When that is exactly what he is trying to do to you, in every single demand that he's making. This is all one way, and it's not in your favour.

Don't unblock him on Facebook. In fact, you should block him on every other means of communication that he has with you. This is not someone that you want in your life.

Oh dear op he really needs to go this is absolutely bizarre behaviour these are not requests they are orders. Run and never look back

6) You need to stop trying to dictate me what to do.

He says in a point by point message dictating what you should do.

Block him, walk away and don't look back. Ever.

Have you actually met?

Sigh. Another woman posting on Mumsnet asking if their controlling, arrogant, fuckwit partner is being reasonable with their behaviour.

Definitely not, please do not unblock him. In fact, block him on everything else

Fuck, no way. Ridiculous control freakery imo.

They're not reasonable, but it is babyish to block someone just because you have had an argument, unless you 100% have no intention of carrying on the relationship. X

End the relationship & don't go back, he sounds like a control freak & I would be getting as far away as possible, block him on all social media & your phone.

From that message I take it you both have issues- him with control and you with your mental health.

He also says you've both lit a lot of effort into the relationship. IMO relationships should take effort. So I'd advise you need to separate , because this relationship isn't healthy.

6) You need to stop trying to dictate me what to do.

Seriously?

I can't believe you even need to ask.

I can't believe only some of these demands are considered red flags by some! Walk away and don't look back - all of it is unreasonable. He wants to control you but act like a free agent. This isn't love and it certainly isn't respect.

Blocking your boyfriend on FB isn't a great way to communicate your displeasure with him, but at least he's shown his true colours now.

You need to answer the phone whenever I call.

This alone is unreasonable. No one could ever guarantee that while maintaining a healthy life of their own.

And this is absolutely why you do NOT allow your children contact with men you have known for only weeks/months.

They may turn out to be absolute fruitcakes, and abusive to boot.

Don’t even think any harder about this. He is a psycho. BLOCK. Block on everything after sending him a very stern message letting him know that if he contacts you again you’ll report him.

He can get to fuck for the shouty caps alone. What an absolute dick.

The alternative of course is that you send back your own rules, seeing as you’re so ‘equal’

• No caps lock. It is the sign of an unhinged mind and I need to be able to respect you.

• No demands around phone, Facebook, photos or friends. I am heartbroken at the lack of trust this displays and know that you would not stoop to such pathetic displays of insecurity HONEY.

• No cheese before bed. It is unmanly.

• No sitting on cushions. It makes your back look odd.

• I can talk to whoever I like and do whatever I like… oh hang on I’m just going to dump you, it’s easier. Soz about that it’s devastating I know but life goes onnnnnnn

Fucking RUN. Utter nutter.

Send him that I dare you 🤣

I would be horrified if someone I'd been in a relationship for 30 years said this but 5 months, I can't believe you're even asking the question op