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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To ask what you’re doing awake post-midnight?

999 replies

5YearsLeft · 12/01/2022 00:24

I had a day that just really banged me about, physically, emotionally, just all the ways, and now, I’m laying here awake and staring at the ceiling.

So why are you awake? Crying baby? Can’t stop thinking? Worried about something tomorrow? Pain somewhere in your body being an arsehole?

Welcome?

OP posts:
Thread gallery
22
Phos · 05/02/2022 03:09

My husband is driving CF in laws to the airport and woke me up and now I can’t get back to sleep so I’m deciding whether or not to get up for a bit and watch a bit of the olympics.

Adatwistscientist · 05/02/2022 03:12

DS been up vomiting, now he's wide awake and I see no chance he's going to settle so after hours of him being awake in my bed, then vomiting on me, we've come down to watch Julia Donaldson films on repeat until he does sleep and I can have my first coffee of the day.

Chichimcgee · 05/02/2022 03:14

@Violinist64 hope you feel better soon, ive only ever had a kidney infection once and it’s bloody horrible.

@Adatwistscientist oh no, hope he feels better soon and you both manage some rest

Violinist64 · 05/02/2022 03:25

Thank you @Chichimcgee.

Ohdofuckofdear · 05/02/2022 03:29

I'm up because my Ulcerative Colitis is having a nasty relapseSadAngry

I am so fed up with being sodding ill!

Nepenthe · 05/02/2022 03:36

I'm awake because I took some Phenergan to help me sleep, as per recommendations on a thread on here. As you can see, it's going really well.

catwomando · 05/02/2022 03:38

@Ohdofuckofdear I have crohns and colitis (double whammy!) so can sympathise. Hopefully it will settle. So you have steroids you can take to get it under control ?

5YearsLeft · 05/02/2022 04:01

@emmaluggs oh no! I just had un unreal sore throat with COVID and had to have my tonsils out at 20 because I kept getting tonsillitis so badly, so I know what you mean when they swell so much that they’re blocking your air! I’m sorry you’re going through that; it’s not a fun time, by any means. I hope the antibiotics work quickly and tomorrow sees a more restful, pain free, snore free (ha) night!

@Want2beme This is so difficult to hear. I can’t possibly tell you if the doctors are right or wrong. I do know that a lot of women have very real conditions diagnosed as “anxiety” instead. But then, I do also know that anxiety can cause very real symptoms. It’s so difficult! I suppose all you can do is try the medication, see if you feel any better, and if you don’t, tell them, hey! I tried it your way and I’m still not okay! And I do hope at least the imaging scans (MRI, etc) could help rule out other major things maybe, when combined with blood results. And then when all of this is happening, you get cystitis symptoms, which ALWAYS happen on a Friday! ARGH! Im so sorry! I think chemists also have cystitis sachets that you can have over the counter, but I can’t remember what they’re called. I hope maybe between that, the bicarbonate, and the hot water bottle, you can make it until you can see an out of hours GP, if you have them available in your area (I know they’re rare as hen’s teeth in some areas).

@funinthesun19 What a tough, tough thing to worry about. I don’t blame you; it has to be so scary hoping that he’ll be okay, not getting a diagnosis that seems so obvious to you who sees him all day long, and then knowing what a big change is coming and all the ways it can go wrong. Completely understand why you’d be in bits in July, I suffer from anxiety (enough that I have pills for the very worst times) so I definitely understand, but I think all you can do is try not to torture yourself BEFORE July. You could easily lose sleep every night between now and when he starts secondary (and you’d be justified!) but instead, maybe just try to tell yourself, we’ll worry about it when we get there. We’ll face it when we get there. There’s nothing more I can do. I imagine part of why you feel so helpless is because you think a diagnosis might help and they won’t give you one, so I would either keep focusing on how to get one before secondary and out my energy in that, or put off my worries about it until I have to (and I don’t say this lightly - this is something INCREDIBLY difficult for me to do, too, to stop worrying until closer to an event itself). And if you can’t get a diagnosis, that’s not your fault. The NHS can’t just let down its youngest members like that. I hope you feel better. And if you need to vent, vent. I don’t blame you. Just… don’t torture yourself with worry.

@catwomando I’m still alive! Made it to the light festival tonight in my wheelchair; pic attached. Good luck with starting over! I have all the faith in the world that you can do it and it’s so much better than staying in a toxic job.

@blublub Wine is often the culprit around here. It’s definitely got a lot to answer for.

@Chichimcgee Oooo I do wish you all the luck, if it IS the first sign of labour - that everything goes smoothly and safely for you and your baby!

@Iseeyoulookingatme Work is a good reason to be awake!

@Violinist64 An acute kidney infection is also a “good” reason to be awake, as in it makes sense Enh you are, but a painful one. I’m glad it’s a bit better than it was earlier this evening but it sounds so painful and uncomfortable. I do hope that they’ve got a plan to clear it up quickly for you. And yes, of course, these things can sense that it’s the weekend, and know when to happen; I’m absolutely positive they can read calendars and they’re bastards. Feel better soon!

@Phos Well… it doesn’t sound like they deserve a ride to the airport but that was nice of DH. Not so nice of him to awaken you in the process. And how did I even miss that the Olympics had started?! Where have I been?

@Adatwistscientist Oh good grief, what an absolute nightmare - I hope the poor lad is feeling better and hopefully doesn’t vomit in you again, oh, EVER. Ha. Take about a mother’s love getting you through some wild things. Hopefully he’ll drift off soon and that sweet, life-giving coffee will be in your hand.

Sorry it’s a rough night for so many!

To ask what you’re doing awake post-midnight?
OP posts:
5YearsLeft · 05/02/2022 04:06

@Ohdofuckofdear Now that is a tough one to have a relapse of. I can only imagine how terrible you’re feeling. I would echo @catwomando about taking your steroids, though when I have to take extra steroids for my autoimmune condition, my sleep is an absolute goner (… which could mean you’ve taken the steroids and that’s why you’re up). Ach, whichever, good luck!!!!

@Nepenthe Oh, no, it doesn’t work for everyone, unfortunately. Sorry to see that you’re part of that group, especially if you’re trying to get much needed sleep. That’s just no good.

OP posts:
Somuddled · 05/02/2022 04:30

I'm awake because someone at work joked (maybe not a joke) that they didn't like me and for some reason it has really upset me. I have to work with them often and they have to train me a lot. I'm not the best with forming friendships but I had tried with this person and so I guess it just really srung. Woke up at 3.30 in tears.

5YearsLeft · 05/02/2022 04:50

@Somuddled Im so sorry! Of course it stung. You’re only human, and we all want to be liked, especially when we put ourselves out there and really try to form a connection with someone. Then to have them make a joke like that, and all that’s ringing in your head is when people say that jokes are often a way of telling the truth, so you don’t feel confident at all about whether they were joking or not. I think everybody has had at least one (or more, or many) night where they’ve had tears at 3:30am, and it’s terrible that this is yours, but if so, know that someone who says something like that isn’t the kind of person you want for a friend, as much as it stings right now and as awkward as you might feel at work. YOU are not the ONE who should feel awkward; they made the joke! Let them feel awkward. And I do hope you feel better and that you end up eventually with a few lovely friends. I know it’s so hard making them as an adult, but don’t give up just because of one arsehole.

OP posts:
Somuddled · 05/02/2022 05:06

Oh gosh. I wasn't expecting a response, and certainly not such a kind one . Friendships have always been a sensitive subject for me. They person did pick up that it threw me a bit and did say 'have I offended you' which I thought was odd choice of words. I wasn't offended. I was hurt. I have Monday and Tuesday off as I have three big exams for my retraining so maybe by Wednesday it wont feel too awkward anymore. My big fear is that I might cry in front of them!

Somuddled · 05/02/2022 05:08

@emmaluggs

Terrible tonsillitis, the antibiotics have now kicked in so I feel much better overall, but tonsils are still enlarged my own snoring is waking me up, partner is sleeping through it though 🤣
Argh. I hope you managed some rest. It all seems worse at night doesn't it?
Adatwistscientist · 05/02/2022 06:36

I got 50 mins of sleep between 4 and 5. Then he was sick again. Now we are up for the day. On the 6th episode of number blocks. Maybe he will be a maths genius by the end of this.

5YearsLeft · 05/02/2022 07:11

@Somuddled Oh, haha, yes, should point it this thread isn’t JUST shouting into the void. I try to respond. Or someone does, though people have insomnia at different hours. And I really hate, “Have I offended you?” It’s really a way of saying, “Oh, have a just been a complete arsehole and a less than decent human being? You’d tell me, wouldn’t you?” Ha! Not my job to be the Arsehole Police! (wee-ooo wee-ooo wee-ooo “We’re here to inform you that you’ve been a world class arsehole to SoMuddled. Hand them their court summons, Sergeant.”) And it’s not your job either! They know that they’ve been offensive, which is why they said that. Drives me batty. And please don’t be afraid of crying. It’s human! You’re allowed to want new friendships ; that’s so normal. I hope you get them and this person perhaps gets a little kick in the pants (I fell asleep before posting - sorry bout that!)

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5YearsLeft · 05/02/2022 07:17

@Adatwistscientist Oh no! 50 minutes is definitely not enough to be getting through that, and that poor wee boy. It must be a 24-hour bug because it can’t be whatever is “in” is stomach. But on the bright side, now you have coffee and you’re raising a genius! I mean, that’s not too bad, considering. Grin I really do hope he starts to really feel better so you can get some real sleep.

OP posts:
5YearsLeft · 05/02/2022 08:50

Ok - sun’s up and that means thread’s “shut” (though you can always comment if you need to just let something out)! Also, we’re almost at the end of this thread so I’ll be starting a brand new one tonight - I’ll put the link here to wrap up this thread and so you can find your way if you’ve been having trouble sleeping for a while.

Good luck on this cloudy-where-I-am Saturday, all, and I hope it’s a restful one.

OP posts:
5YearsLeft · 05/02/2022 09:16

Also @Glorieta I try to catch everyone but just seen that I missed you! Croup must be absolutely terrifying, and in addition to that… really bloody inconvenient from the sounds of it. I do hope you eventually got some warm kit and didn’t get too-freezing hands or feet or any bits in your own lounge. I really hope maybe last night was a turning point for your DC (I mean to be fair, I’ve cried due to tiredness myself, har har, so I sympathize) and maybe they’re able to nap today, regardless of age, or sleep tonight.

OP posts:
blublub · 05/02/2022 10:14

@catwomando yep boiling. I know it was freezing because it was on the thermostat but even in the buff I was sweating. Managed to nod off after three after some paracetamol. You think by 36 I would have learned 🙄

Win-awake. Genius. I’m sure it’ll appear in my predictive text soon!

Glorieta · 05/02/2022 11:09

Thank you so much @5YearsLeft

Felt too cold so moved back to my big bed and finally got to sleep at 3am.

Hes now jumping around like a loon and like a PP I'm being subjected to back to back episodes of number blocks blaring loudly in the background

Take care all who had a restless /sleepness night

meatyryvita · 05/02/2022 11:17

A non-sleeping puppy who has been barking non-stop

5YearsLeft · 05/02/2022 11:27

Hey all - I wanted to get a link to the new thread in before this one is completely full.
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/4473171-To-ask-what-you-re-doing-awake-post-midnight-Part-2-Insomnia-Strikes-Back
It’s where we’ll be posting tonight.

@meatyryvita Poor puppy and poor you!! I hope it’s just a short phase as he or she is settling and soon DPup will be sleeping soundly and guarding you from insomnia.

@Glorieta Glad you got some warmth! But of course, now the trial by Number Blocks begins…

OP posts:
5YearsLeft · 05/02/2022 14:42

It feels fitting to use one of our last posts to (hopefully) try to help each other - that’s what after-midnight is for. So @Want2beme - wanted to let you know that @Nepenthe has a large cystitis recommendation for you as the first post on the new thread if you’re struggling and want to come read it!
The link is: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/4473171-To-ask-what-you-re-doing-awake-post-midnight-Part-2-Insomnia-Strikes-Back

OP posts:
TwoBigNoisyBoys · 06/02/2022 09:26

Thanks for the new link @5YearsLeft, I’ll head over there now 😊

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