AIBU to have ‘gone off’ working?

[haribofiend]

Okay so I realise I am unreasonable!

But does anyone else feel the same?

I’m not a lazy person, have always worked v.hard, too hard at times, if anything!

But lately (since Covid / lockdown, but maybe it’s just a coincidence) I’m so fed up of it. I’m not in the wrong job - I like my work well enough… but not as much as I’d like leisure time I find I’m wistfully looking forward to retirement, and I’m only 34!!

I’m a bit shocked at myself tbh. Is it just me who’s had this change of heart lately and needs a big old boot up the bum?

Me too. 35. I'm doing my dream job but just cba so much of the time. Luckily I'm still mostly WFH and have relatively few meetings, so I can re-organise my day to take a longer "lunch" break mid afternoon and mooch around town, go out for coffee etc.
Basically I'd like to have more leisure time but still get paid the same. I'm looking seriously at working compressed hours, so 8am-6pm 4 days a week and an extra day off. I feel like I'd be more motivated if the work/life balance was weighted more evenly.

I’m quite a bit older than you op, but I know exactly what you mean. The only thing that helps me is exercising before work (I go for a run). When I don’t run I feel horrible all day, really sluggish and lacking motivation. I put it down to getting old and peri menopause, but many younger people are feeling the same way at the moment so there must be other factors at play.

I think like alot of people I'm just worn out.

I love my job and colleagues but it is hard going.

I just want to travel again.

I needed to read this thread today. Feeling so despondent about my career at the moment. On paper, I'm in a reasonable role - management level with an ok salary, but I feel like I've made no progress for the last 6 or so years, and achieved nothing. I made the mistake of looking at ast colleagues on LinkedIn yesterday and it made me want to cry to see what some of them are up to now.

I hate my job and I’m miserable. I’ve been here for 15 years and I’m well paid but won’t get the same pay elsewhere. It’s a horrible company that I have no faith in and it’s incredibly stressful. They got rid of most of my team a few years ago so I’m hoping I will be next. I have spoken to my DH about leaving and using my savings to retrain in something I want to do but the risks are too big. I might hate the studying, I might not get a job after. With this one I’m lucky that I have job security in an uncertain time but my anxiety is so bad I’m not sure I’ll last another year. Can’t wait for retirement!

Ive worked since 16. Even worked part time every evening while I self funded my way through uni.

Since mat leave 7 years ago I have lost the drive, not helped by furlough over lock down. I'm 50 next year and just cannot be bothered. Dreaming of a lottery win tbh.

Yep me and I own my own business.

I think peoples attitudes to other people have really changed and i feel like I don't actually like 'people' any more!

Any possibility of part time work? It's great for childcare, career (although not progression) and work life balance.

This was me I'm 57 and I packed in my well paid senior job earlier this year as I just couldn't continue. Although everyone thought I was doing a great job I had lost all motivation. I have ADD and working on zoom all day sat at a screen was hell. I found it almost impossible to concentrate. Since retiring I haven't sat at my desk in six months and I am so much happier. I have a load of projects on the go and am really enjoying life.

I have tried putting in a fake “commute.” In the mornings which helps a bit. Leave the house at 8.30 for a 25 minute walk around the block. It does at least make me feel like I’ve made a transition from home to work. And gives me a bit of daylight.

I quit my job a few months ago, mid 40’s. Used to love it; high pressure, travel, great team and great benefits. Jacked it all in as there were a few changes at work but honestly needed a break after lockdown. My work was busier than ever then and combined with homeschooling it nearly broke me. I was never in the office 5 days, probably 2 days WFH plus travel but I think not seeing anyone F2F for so long has really affected me in terms of motivation and engagement. Burning through savings but also only live once and health/happiness is more important.

I’m being productive in other ways and will go back to something this year. Thought of being FT again with a new team is both very exciting but also a bit scary; my brain needs to reengage in a different way and right now not quite ready for it.

I wouldn’t class myself as someone with MH issues but the last 2 years have certainly taken a toll on me.

This thread shows just how crap managers are at keeping an eye on what their staff are doing! I genuinely don't understand what most managers are for.

I hate working now - started my current job just a bit before lockdown and loved it. Now hate it. Feel completely and utterly disconnected from all my colleagues and can't be arsed trying to get reconnected to them being as WFH will be permanent for us.

I’m 43, burned out before Covid started, so have changed jobs twice since December 2019, but I’m struggling to find my work mojo.
I’m a GP, used to love me work and found a lot of meaning in it. I still enjoy seeing patients, but the overwhelming workload and feeling of not being able to help anyone due to cuts in health and social care and ridiculous waiting lists, not to mention that I’ve always disliked telephone consultations, means that I could happily walk away tomorrow and not look back.
The article on languishing resonates!

Maybe your job is a Bullshit Job. (Obviously you don't have to state what it is). Do you think that the work you do makes a positive contribution to society? If your employer and all similar employers shut up shop tomorrow, would it make much difference to everyone else (apart from staff losing their salaries)?

A lot of jobs are essentially futile - box-ticking, bean-counting or literally trotting around to make someone else look important because they are a 'manager'. Doing jobs like these can be poisonous to mental health. The main reason bullshit jobs exist is because there is a culture among the ruling class that the lower orders must be kept 'busy' and under control...

@immersivereader

What are my coworkers actually doing with their days to make me look so good?

^

This too. Standards have dropped. I'm a fucking genius at work now

😂😂

I'm getting promoted soon to a very good position. Starting salary is £75,000

I have literally never ever worked less and tried less in my life. For example. It's 10:22 and I'm on Mumsnet.

I don't know what's going on and I don't care. Take the money and run is my motto.

Morale and Motivation. Sadly lacking here in a similar way although I am older and just retired (early).
I seem to be looking for something to do to pass the time. I am not looking to do something that I really want to do. Merely fill up the day.
Another aspect of this is we all really need to pause and treat people in a more thoughtful way.
As we see on some of these topics people have shorter fuses than they used to have answers are shorter and we get shouty and sweary very quickly.
Our natural goodwill is being drained. But being human we can recognise and adapt.
Best wishes to all.

I don't know how much of my embitterment comes from reading over on the Reddit r/antiwork subreddit - seeing how companies treat us all and lining the pockets of rich, ungrateful dicks wo the rules of lockdown didn't apply to has made me realise life is way to short.

I just don't know how to get out of the rut. "Just start your own business" isn't easy and I have nothing I could "start a business" with.

My absolute, 100% dream would be to take beauty courses and a course in post-mortem reconstruction, get my embalmers certificate and work freelance from there. Perhaps head into forensics off the back of that but the reconstruction course alone is £10k. Nail courses £500 PLUS, beauty courses £500 PLUS. Embalmer course £10k PLUS. If I had the money I'd do it in a heartbeat - then if the forensics angle doesn't work I could set up a little studio in my garden and do nails as and when I pleased and be able to be home for my kids when I bloody well liked.

I think Covid and lockdown shrunk down so much of life to pottering around at home that people are becoming satisfied with less (and even yearning for it if this thread is anything to go by). With travel, nights out, even going to the gym on hold, some people have also had fewer outgoings so even the motivation to work to fund a certain lifestyle has diminished. I’ve worked from home for years so I’ve just continued to do more of the same without much changing, but DH (who loves his job and went into the office right through the pandemic apart from a couple of weeks at the start) has noticed younger staff are still reluctant to come back or do much more than the bare minimum from home - and the farther they live from the office the less likely they are to want to come in. I think that what people need to remember that this is not retirement - since they are still being paid a full salary and there is still some shape to the week even if they are doing the bare minimum. But I do think there’s also a sense of having seen how life can be it’s hard for some people to get back to how life was. I don’t think you are alone OP.

Joining in as feeling very similar. I'm hoping it's just January though. I really like my job, started about a year ago. Like my bosses, like the team. But just cannot seem to make myself go at it the way I was a few months or even years ago pre covid. I'm late 40s so have to do this for at least another 20 years which didn't bother me so much before but now it just seems so tedious.

Another thing that absolutely did me in is the fact that, despite being off sick, in and out of the very hospital I worked in, with pregnancy related illnesses, my workplace kept trying to pull me in to fucking meetings to discuss shit that didn't actually matter. Then they tried it when I went on maternity leave which is illegal and would have meant I lost maternity pay.

I AM OFF SICK! I'M NOT GOING TO SIT WORKING FOR FREE WHEN I AM SEVERELY UNWELL! BUGGER OFF!

YANBU, for the past nearly 2 years I have not been doing the job I signed up to and I am fed up with it! OK, i've still got the same job title, role, company and colleagues etc but prior to Covid I was working in Client offices, had regular face to face meetings, travelled around the country regularly......I did not sign up to a lifetime of Teams meetings and being stuck in the corner of my spare room. Even now the office has reopened it's hit n miss who's in so some days I might as well have sat at home on my own for all the interaction I get with other people.

I don't know what's going on and I don't care. Take the money and run is my motto.
Yes! My vague plan is to find a better-paying job – I’m senior but in a mission-led aka “do it for passion not money” sector – but pretend I’m on the same salary as now. Stash and save to go freelance again. I loved being freelance, I barely did a thing and charged a fortune for it. It’s only the cost of childcare and The Pension Fear that made me get a job.

I’m genuinely torn at the moment between three career paths:
(A) give a shit and work a bit more and pursue the high salary so I can save like buggery to retire early/on time despite cost of living etc
(B) join the civil service, about which I don’t really care, purely for the pension and family friendliness, but stay part time because I value the free time, so never hit that high salary mark
(C) drastically reduce outgoings and pretend pensions aren’t a thing and just work a little to keep wolf from door, but prioritise life and probably die in penury

Struggling to think of a fourth path. Deeply envious of people who’ve been on the housing ladder ages and have the option to trade down. All those lockdown articles about “we left the rat race and started a duck sanctuary in the wilderness and we’re so happy!” and it turns out they had half a million in house equity and baller savings so leaving the rat race was actually an option.

This thread shows just how crap managers are at keeping an eye on what their staff are doing! I genuinely don't understand what most managers are for

I.work in retail. I think the problem is we dont really have managers. I mean there's a shop manager in thr sense of someone who has all the responsibilities of doing Rotas and keeping staff informed of targets etc but theres no ability any more for managers to manage. No real input in how individual shops are run so we can tailor offers or opening hours etc to the area we are in. No deviation from the national master plan. And certainly not the ability to bring in extra staff to run any kind if promotion etc.

It must be incredibly de moralising to not be asked to make any meaningful changes to how your shop is run/staffed etc

Yes, I am definitely over having to work! I'm nearly 45 and have been working for over 20 years and still have more than 20 to go.
I think my feeling is a combo of burnout and languishing. My work was busy right through 2020 and most of 2021, plus having to homeschool, husband losing job (has temp contract now) and family member dying. Oh and having to cope, and support children to cope with all the damaging effects of the pandemic. I am also very likely in perimenopause so that just adds to the fun. I am so TIRED!

I feel much the same. I'm self employed and my role was heavily affected by covid - so I ended up living off the SEISS grants (which of course I'm grateful for). Now things are closer to normal I'm working again, but finding it such a slog.

I want to have lie ins every day, have time to exercise, and read my book for at least 5 hours a day. Is that so wrong?!!

I am aware that's not possible though, so work continues for now.