There’s always one - parent WhatsApp group

[CoronaKidd]

I’m a long-term parent as I have older kids but this is my first time on a parent WhatsApp group (for my youngest).

In general it is fine but now the preschool has corona and one member of the group is being ridiculously unreasonable. Basically it seems she’s unhappy with the nursery but comes across to me as being so entitled and ungrateful. She seems to be very unhappy that her DC may have now been exposed at nursery - which is utterly ridiculous given it is absolutely rife in our area and really beyond anyone’s control.

I know I just need to ignore the negativity but, I’m really having to bite my tongue. I’ve tried a few diplomatic replies but she’s not getting it.

I’m tempted to report the comments back to the preschool but would that just be causing more trouble?

People are to blame though. Countless people continue to not take responsibility, I think it’s ok to be angry at this.
Especially if nursery isn’t communicating well.

It’s just the risk of sending your kids to nursery/school at the moment.

step away and ignore it she is not in a place to be listening to anyone she is on a soap box and its just not your job to sort her out

I've learned not to reply to those rants, even to be informative like pointing out where to find the complaints procedure, it's just fuel to the fire and passes quicker if it's ignored.

I wouldn't report to the school unless there was a threat involved or something similarly dangerous (which did happen in a parents' facebook group but I didn't learn about it until the hell aftermath which involved parents at the school gates in each other and staff's faces, police getting involved, and everyone who was on the post the threat was made on getting called. That group is now heavily moderated). We know it's not one but a small group of parents who will turn anything into a fight if they get half a chance.

@Cocoabutterformula

Ask her if she voted Tory? The incompetence of the government may have contributed to the level in your area.

Don't be so utterly silly, it's engulfed the whole globe or hadn't you noticed

I never understand how the long chain of events leads to x specific situation at times, especially when it would generate a wide effect rather than target specific ?

No, please don't snitch on her. That'd be even more childish than her just moaning on a WhatsApp group. Also, please don't ask if she voted Tory, it'll make you sound like a twat who is touting Labour. Just don't get involved the conversation. She'll stop if no-one panders.

Leave the WhatsApp group and don’t join another one. They are nothing but a massive ball ache.

Just ignore the message. For sure, don't be telling tales to the nursery. This absolutely makes you 'that one parent', yourself.

I'm saddened by how divisive everything is. Covid is literally everywhere right now and I suspect we may as well expect to catch it sooner or later, regardless of our vaccination status. But the virus itself seems to be taking second place to the desire to scapegoat and shame on the basis of very little evidence.

Report her for what? Having a moan about the preschool?

Just ignore her fgs.

“There’s always one.” Sounds like there’s TWO difficult parents in the group tbh. If you tattle to the nursery, you will get labelled as THAT parent by the staff.

Do not tell on her to the preschool 🙄🙄

Maybe you are not ready for a WhatsApp group.

Things won't blow over if people keep responding to her - so just stop responding and eventually she will run out of wind.

It's parents like this that mean the nursery will absolutely protect their staff (or they should do). The only time I would mention to nursery is if the parent says she has discovered who it is or is she says what she's planning to do with the information if she does find out. Nursery staff members are often quite young and local to their workplace so identifiable so absolutely need protecting from batshit parents like this!

Reporting would be a strange thing to do, not sure why you’d even think to do this. Just ignore her or leave the group if she’s annoying enough.

I had someone recently blaming 'other people's lax parenting' for the fact their dc picked up covid from school. Very hard to note your tongue but I think you have to. If everyone ignores they'll get bored. You won't change their mind so not worth trying

You don't have to like her or agree with her, but she has as much right to her opinion as you do, and she's allowed to vent, even if she's being stupid or unreasonable. There's nothing to be gained by interfering. Dealing with stupid and unreasonable parents is part of running a nursery. They can handle it on their own, in their own way.

Confront her directly (and create even more unpleasantness, in the process) or stay out of it. "Reporting" her for something like this would be utterly ridiculous.

Two options : 1. Ignore her. 2. Leave group. End of options.

just ignore or remove yourself from group.

I’m a primary teacher. Trust me, we always know who is ‘that parent’ and have a good idea that they’re whining about something at any given time. No need to report it.

No one would blame you though if you very matter of factly pointed out that she’s being a cockwomble though.

In my experience as a nursery manager the parents who tend to kick off like this are younger and with some health anxieties that might stem from real reasons. You might have multiple kids but you need to have some consideration that at this age point quite a few parents are first timers. Just leave the group if it bugs you so nuch

Thing is, the WhatsApp group is a thing between parents that happens outside of the nursery. Telling the nursery that this person has been ranting will either upset someone who works there or annoy the people who work there.

Eventually the WhatsApp group should calm down. This person will put up a rant and no one else will respond (because they’ve had enough).

A few people have said to leave the group. It’s up to you if you do but please don’t be that person who leaves then asks their friend to keep them updated on the useful stuff that comes up. I’ve been that friend and it annoyed me.

Well I wouldn’t report it to the nursery. There was terrible bitchiness last year about a teacher on a group chat and someone went back and reported it to the school. The teacher heard everything being said by one individual in particular and had a near breakdown and had to go on stress leave. It just be kept where it is, on the chat.
I’d just keep your distance as much as you can.

@llansanan

Ask her if she voted Tory? The incompetence of the government may have contributed to the level in your area.

Ignore ignore ignore.
It's so irritating but you will only make it worse by commenting.
Mute the group and don't respond to argumentative messages.
You have my sympathy. I cannot wait for the end of this year to leave my year 6 group. 2 esp irritating women who start stupid discussions that fill me with rage

HaveringWavering

“I’d only be concerned if she was getting lots of replies of agreement from the other parents. If nobody is repeating her views or encouraging her then most likely the rest are probably rolling their eyes and ignoring. She’ll be posting this to get other people’s support for kicking up a fuss with the preschool. If nobody bites them she’ll probably drop it.”

I think this is what she’s aiming for but thankfully no one else is going along with it so I suppose the other parents may be thinking the same.

Unfortunately, I’ve fallen victim to being manipulated by fellow parents in the past, so I suppose my shit radar is more a tad more sensitive than most.

I think you're in for a thin time if you rise to annoying parents on WhatsApp groups. I would ignore or leave the group. No good can come from confrontation.