Aibu to be cross at nursery for banning birthday cake (not covid/allergy related)

[Crystalann]

Today we received this message from my son's nursery

^*We are promoting healthy eating within the nursery therefore unfortunately we are no longer able to accept birthday cakes being brought in for celebrations, we will still be celebrating with the children with banners, singing happy birthday and presenting them with a handmade birthday card from their class. 🥳

We are duty bound to follow the revised EYFS where changes place a great emphasis on promoting nutrition, healthy eating and oral health for all children under the age of 5 years.*^

To my knowledge, the EYFS makes no mention at all of any specific food.

Recently, when it was DS birthday and we sent cake in it had to be factory sealed still and shop bought (for hygiene) and they weren’t allowed to blow candles out (because of Covid) but staff would cut and share it with the children who were allergy safe to have it, with anyone not allowed being given an alternative snack.

This new “rule” is simply because they’ve decided to teach our kids birthday cake is bad for us, unhealthy and shouldn’t be allowed and this is what is making me cross!

I believe every food can be healthy, in an acceptable moderation, as part of a balanced diet.

I imagine it's just that while 1 piece of cake isn't 'bad' that 1 piece x however many children are in the class may be? Plus maybe some parents have said they don't want their child having those sweets?

I don't know why, but just because they're not allowed it in nursery surely doesn't mean they're saying its 'bad' or stopping you giving it in the 100+ hours the child is home with you?

I wouldn’t be impressed if my child had cake a few times a month at nursery just because it’s some kid’s birthday. If you want other kids to have cake, invite them to your house. Kids eat enough sugar as it is anyway.

The lack of cake wouldn't bother me - thr children won't know any different and you can have cake at home.
Nursery shouldn't be giving out sugary food to toddlers anyway. They have no control over the cheap rubbishy cakes likely to be brought in by parents. The NHS advises no refined sugar at all for under 4s.
Hopefully they aren't teaching that particular foods are unhealthy though.

Also they are not teaching kids that cake is bad, that’s a bit overdramatic. They just don’t want to serve cake 30 times a year.

I think they're just saying that cake is ok in moderation and best eaten at home.

Cake is for family. Or a party.

Not nursery. You are being ridiculous!

Perhaps it's also because not all families can afford to send in cake.

I think that's a very sensible approach from the nursery.

YABU. I’m a big fan of cake but there would be birthday cake virtually every day if everyone brought in cake for their DC’s birthday. Why would you think it was an OK thing to bring in cake?

I'd be happy with this as I find it's a constant battle to limit sugar intake in DS (treats from family members, Xmas choc, baking activities etc).

Also, as he does have milk & egg allergies, it would take the pressure off to bring an alternative home made cupcake each birthday. I appreciate you've said the decision is not allergy related, though future students may well have allergies, so I'm all for this new rule.

Maybe the nursery is trying to achieve the 'Healthy Eating ' status that many childcare providers/schools are looking to achieve.

Hence, schools saying no to sweets being dished out on children's birthdays.

I'm torn. I see your point but the largish nursery my two went to meant LOTS of birthdays and therefore lots of cake. Pretty much once or twice a week which was too much.

i dont know why they cant just be honest and say it leaves crumbs everywhere and the kids are all a sticky mess...its inconvenient and staff can't be bothered to deal with the sugar rush fallout whilst clearing away and dealing with leftover cake and the cake knife! all a bit pointless really

a) not everyone can afford to bring in a cake.
b) it’s not in moderation if 30 kids bring in cake. That’s more than twice a month IF they’re evenly spaced.
c) it’s not fair on the kids with allergies/parents who don’t allow cake to see their friends sat there eating it.

Shop bought birthday cakes are truly horrific
In my nursery they mostly go in the bin as parents try to get the biggest cake
We cut them up very small and bin the rest
I wish we could ban them, might suggest it

I would have no issue with this. Sounds like it might be a convenient excuse to cover a wide range of concerns around allergies, disruption, not everyone being in a position to provide cake etc etc.

If it’s that big of an issue for you, move to a nursery that lets them have cake.

Are you one of the parents who tried to smuggle McDonald’s through the school gates when Jamie Oliver was on his turkey twizzler crusade?

@Marmite27

a) not everyone can afford to bring in a cake. b) it’s not in moderation if 30 kids bring in cake. That’s more than twice a month IF they’re evenly spaced. c) it’s not fair on the kids with allergies/parents who don’t allow cake to see their friends sat there eating it.

A) It’s always been optional and never expected. B) There’s only 12 kids in a class so it’s not often they get it and it’s a tiny piece C) if you express you’d like to bring one on days where someone with an allergy attends you’re advised of their allergy needs to provide for them too - again all optional but it’s provide for all or none (which I support)

@GirlInACountrySong

i dont know why they cant just be honest and say it leaves crumbs everywhere and the kids are all a sticky mess...its inconvenient and staff can't be bothered to deal with the sugar rush fallout whilst clearing away and dealing with leftover cake and the cake knife! all a bit pointless really

I’d actually be ok with this!

I have an elder (adult) daughter who has an eating disorder. I’m therefore extremely sensitive to suggesting any food is “unhealthy”

@ShirleyPhallus

Are you one of the parents who tried to smuggle McDonald’s through the school gates when Jamie Oliver was on his turkey twizzler crusade?

Nope I’m afraid not. I was worse when daughter was small but now it’s son's turn everything is cooked from scratch and considered a pretty perfect balanced diet (not sure how long I’ll manage achieving it though haha)

Lots of cheap supermarket cake isn't healthy though.

Nursery can still serve their own, healthier cake.

You can still do birthday cake at home.

This is a non-issue.

To my knowledge, the EYFS makes no mention at all of any specific food.
The framework itself doesn't, but it is read alongside non-statutory best practice guidance documents which do talk in detail about specific foods, sample menus and reducing salt and sugar.

@Snowiscold

YABU. I’m a big fan of cake but there would be birthday cake virtually every day if everyone brought in cake for their DC’s birthday. Why would you think it was an OK thing to bring in cake?

Because it’s been their policy until now. There’s only 12 kids a class, it’s always been a tiny offering and it’s not them banning cake - it’s them banning birthday cake as unhealthy - if they limited daily lunch/snacks all good, kids should have a good diet.

My son recently started nursery and I was baffled to find he was sent home with birthday cake about once a week. What possesses parents to do this? I hope ours has banned them too because trying to get DS to bed one hour after scoffing cake is difficult!

I've got 4 children aged 4-14 and none of their nurseries or schools have ever allowed birthday cake or sweets to be brought in to share.

Perhaps I wasn’t clear enough here - my issue is not that cake is now banned. It’s the message that it’s banned for being unhealthy. There are many more preferable reasons to ban cake.