AIBU to want to start my own 'working class Mumsnet'?

[shoplifteroftheworld]

I see so many topics and conversations on here that just don't relate to my own life and experiences. Lots of well off women talking about their recent purchases from Boden or Uniqlo or some other place I can't afford to shop. Chat about dinner parties and holidays abroad. I'd like a site for mums and women on lower incomes as this site can leave a lot of us feeling left out of certain conversations.

Yanbu. Also lots of MC SAHMs and working mums who 'chose their DH wisely'... and or their 'career path'... 'Planned financially for DC'.

IMHO, a lot of these so called MC posters appear thick as pig shit, sheltered, pretentious pearl clutchers.

Yanbu OP....I searched on here once looking for advice on childcare arrangements for two small children and couldn't find a single thread that didn't involve hiring a nanny. I didn't bother to start my own because it put me right off to be honest.

For what it's worth, yes you do need to be on a certain level of income to shop in Boden and £37.50 is more than I would spend on a dress. I'm not working class, but nor can I afford these things

@ParkingDiagram WTF?

@FindingMeno

£37.50 That's going out to a wedding sort of money for a dress.

I have spent less than that on a dress for a wedding. It came from a charity shop. You can get lucky! And dresses for weddings just need to look nice/be a certain length rather than withstand repeated washes. And for a formal occasion, a lot of it is about the makeup/accessories/shoes and you can look nice in a very simple dress.

If you live in an area where most people buy their clothes at Asda or Primark then funnily enough in charity shops the clothes are mainly from... Asda and Primark. I found some work clothes from Next in a charity shop near me once and it was quite the occasion!

@ssd

Endless threads on here about the horror of not having been abroad lately, or having to cancel expensive theatre tickets or seeing shows or bands live. When you haven't money you don't have these things. A pandemic isnt so bad for those of us not having anything to give up.

Thats an interesting perspective. A lot of the media were going on about how terrible the pandemic was for poorer people as they tended not to be able to wfh and were in flats with small children without gardens. I don't have my private garden, just a communal garden but I am not a big garden person so I didn't understand why gardens were so important during the pandemic. I did find the pandemic difficult for different reasons- not being able to visit my family in another country, not being able to eat out (which is a luxury), not being able to go to central london (which was where I figured I would be spending 90% of the time when I bought my flat). But the message was that I was one of the lucky ones because my income was unaffected during the pandemic, though I was considerably less lucky than the actual middle classes who could afford to buy houses in the Home Counties with huge gardens (and not worry about the thousands of pounds for rail season tickets/the cost of stamp duty if they needed to move back to the city post pandemic unlike plebs like me who can't afford it). But still, the message I got was that lockdown /the pandemic was punishing for poor people and it meant many couldn't afford food or to pay rent; so it was wrong to support lockdown even if cases were high.

@SarahJessicaParker1

So that's why I didn't write the full name of Netmums - in case it was forbidden!

I see it isn't though (assuming this posts)

I'm extremely curious as to which word is automatically hidden! I've been here years and had no idea!

[quote WhoAre]@onlychildhamster but it is though, because she could sell it 😂😂😂😂😂[/quote]
well my MIL is orthodox Jewish so she is tied to her area. But so many working class londoners own houses worth £600k; my DH's grandpa is a black cab driver who worked till he was 90 and he owned a house in outer london that is roughly £550k. Surely he can't be considered wealthy because he is old enough to buy when houses were affordable.

I might start my own mumsnet but only for gingers. I'm fed up of there never being any threads about it and all you middle class, shall I name my baby Tarquin or Lord Farquar types that you all are, no exceptions, you're all the same and I'm definitely not generalising, can stay here and stealth boast to your hearts content. Over on gingenet we will mock you and congratulate ourselves on being better than you. Ha.

@onlychildhamster actually thinking about it, the last dress I bought for a wedding was £3.99 in a charity shop. It was gorgeous and a perfect fit!

I grew up economically in the underclass - a struggling single parent on benefits, with chaotic lifestyle, frequently homeless or lacking sufficient food. I am culturally middle class - radio 4 and libraries were free- and Oxbridge educated (only through sheer grit) and we are a high earning household. I don’t belong anywhere but I find some people on MN I can identify with and many others I cannot. I am struggling with infertility so the pregnancy and parenting boards are just off limits right now (even the conception board) - I cannot imagine being annoyed by a crying baby, something I so desperately want, like many normal mums are - but I find my people on the infertility board, and various others. YABU to judge everyone here by fairly superficial factors like where they shop. I have boden clothes, bought secondhand. So what?

The only people i know who shop in charity shops are people who can easily afford Boden etc. Its fine buying the odd cheap 2nd hand item if you know you can go into john Lewis the next day and spend a few hundred on your barbour jacket and hobbs dress. Maybe the folk shopping in primark and asda actually want something new that no one has worn before them, as thats all they're getting??

I definitely can't afford Boden or John Lewis but I love a good charity shop.

@KiloWhat

Have you tried starting threads about your own life experiences?

I think she just did

[quote BoopTheFloof]@ParkingDiagram WTF?[/quote]
You were one of the people I quoted who appeared to be taking the piss out of working class MNers by posting a series of regional names for mothers.

Wealth isn't directly related to class, if you want an example I have just been watching the Two Fat Ladies cookery show on YouTube. Both the ladies had difficult periods in their lives when they had very little money and had to work as cooks. But you only had to hear them speak for a minute to know they were upper class, posh as Alexander de Pfeffel Johnson, and acceptable at any fancy shooting party or soiree. Class is like your culture, it's to do with your background, your family and friends and how you were raised, how you talk and behave, the things you like or dislike. You can change class, but it's not as simple as how much money you have.

Money doesn't always buy you style. I have friends on lower incomes who can make bargain finds/Primark clothes look a million dollars. I can afford more expensive clothes but my innate fashion sense is shite.

@SawdustAndHay 🤣

I'm with you OP. Uniqlo IS expensive for me, I only shop on Ebay or in charity shops. Unable to work due to chronic illnesses and a bit fed up of some of the topics on here from some very privileged people. But I do just ignore them if I spot them. Just before Christmas there were a lot of questions about how much to tip the cleaner etc

@SawdustAndHay

A specific place on Mumsnet might be be a start. Call it Peasants’ Corner.

proper lol. ask 'em.

@ssd

The only people i know who shop in charity shops are people who can easily afford Boden etc. Its fine buying the odd cheap 2nd hand item if you know you can go into john Lewis the next day and spend a few hundred on your barbour jacket and hobbs dress. Maybe the folk shopping in primark and asda actually want something new that no one has worn before them, as thats all they're getting??

I'm sure there are charity shoppers like that, but I'm not one of them. I very rarely buy anything new - on the odd occasion I have it's from the sale rail at Tesco - I think I got a denim skirt for £5 there last spring and that's about the only new thing I remember buying this year, apart from underwear.

This thread is turning into an actual parody of itself as offended middle-class MNers compete to post about how they or someone they know are really poor. However, acceptably poor in MN world means they work 18 hours a day cleaning the house of an MC MNer but don’t claim any benefits.

@BiscuitLover3678 dresses in the Boden sale are £10, I’ll be able to sell them on for the same. Got a whole load of clothes from John Lewis for £2-3 clearance, I’ll probably make money on selling them when we are done. They are the same prices of supermarket clothes, the John Lewis things are cheaper.

@ParkingDiagram WellI’m from one of the regions referenced in two of the names and lived for a long time in the region referenced by the other.

If you think that there is anything wrong with the words “Mam,”Maw” or “Ma” you’re the one who thinking working class means inferior not me.