She was 42?! I’m 44

[AmIoldbutdontrealiseit]

Shirley Valentine. Sat watching it on Channel 5, obviously seen it before but when very young so it didn’t have quite the same impact.
Cannot believe she was 42, I’ve just turned 44 and whilst I don’t feel young, I’m surely not frumpy and middle aged, pretty as she was, if you know what I mean?
The anorak wearing, egg and chip making and very mumsy, almost grandma feel?
I realise it was set in the 80’s but is it that we look/act younger now, or that we’re really middle aged and frumpy but don’t realise it 😬
In comparison, I have a 3 year old Dd, a career, live abroad, have longer hair, wear converse, parka and Gucci bag (just example today’s outfit) use Instagram, have many interests. My life is mainly centred around Dd so isn’t wild as in before, clubbing, festivals, travelling etc…but..is this what my age is really like inside?

Hope that made sense 🤣

@MrsSantaClausitback

Just finished watching it. I’m 40. my thoughts too- shocking!!

She should’ve stayed in Greece!

@MrsSantaClausitback

Are you sure you finished watching the film? Shirley did stay in Greece!

@GreenGreenTreesOfHome But do we know for sure that she did stay in Greece? Or did she go back with her husband? It doesn’t say does it, or did I miss it 🙈

I reckon my Mum dressed pretty fashionably in the 80's/90's/00's but looking back she looked older in her 30's (fashion wise) than in her 50's but I think that says more about my perspective than anything!
Lots of the women I know wear converse too (40's, 50's and teens!) I don't think my converse have the same vibe as my DD's 😂

My mum looked young at 42. Even in dodgy early 90s pictures. Properly pretty too. And younger in the face than I look now.

But she had no fun. And she acted old.

No no no, not egg and chips. Chips and egg! (Which is so wrong)

@Beamur I feel like pretty much all trainers are criticised in some way. If I wear my Adidas Gazelles from the 90’s I’m still stuck in that era (which I probably am in lots of ways) if I wear new, chunky Nikes, I shouldn’t, because I’m not 19, other makes are too *Mumsy apparently 🤷🏻‍♀️Can’t win

@ButYouGottaHaveASkillJeff (Name 🤣) but I always egg and chips 🤷🏻‍♀️

I watched SV for the first time tonight and loved it!

I like to think her husband stayed a week in Greece then they went back home, Shirley got a job in the department store and her and Jane went on twice yearly holidays abroad. She met up with Marjorie majors regularly and had lovely leisurely lunches out with her. Joe learnt how to cook his own steak on Thursdays and the wall became a focal point decorated with souvenirs from all Shirleys holidays.

[quote AmIoldbutdontrealiseit]@GreenGreenTreesOfHome But do we know for sure that she did stay in Greece? Or did she go back with her husband? It doesn’t say does it, or did I miss it 🙈[/quote]
Just watched the last 5 minutes again (as I have it recorded,) and Shirley's husband comes to Greece to find her, and it ends with them on the beach together at a table (still in Greece.) So it is a bit ambiguous to be fair, but I am pretty sure she stays there. There was no mention of her going back...As I said, it is a bit ambiguous though...

Now just watching a show about the 90’s with Oasis etc on…and I’m 16 again. Having experienced that and still thinking it doesn’t look sad or dated, how can I be middle aged and like Shirley Valentine 😅getting older is shit!

I remember reading this ages ago, it's interesting
https://www.boredpanda.com/past-young-people-look-older/?utmsource=google&utmmedium=organic&utm_campaign=organic

I imagined that they went back together and some positive changes were made. Shirley developed a life for herself, her husband (hopefully) grew/changed with her etc

Different times, nowadays 14 yrs olds & 45 yrs old dress the same whereas in the 80s there was much greater distinction.

@Beamur

When my Mum was 42 I was 21. She'd been married more than 20 years and was pretty fed up. She left my Dad a few years later and was much happier! I think she would have totally 'got' Shirley. I was in a very different place at the same age.

I’ll be in a similar boat at 42. I’ll have a 23 and 19 year old, although I dropped the dead weight years ago I still feel utterly bogged down with the drudgery of raising DC. I’m planning on buying a camper and taking off in it. Just 7 years to go!

[quote AmIoldbutdontrealiseit]@ButYouGottaHaveASkillJeff (Name 🤣) but I always egg and chips 🤷🏻‍♀️[/quote]

Yeah so do I, but in the film she calls it chips and egg. Sounds so wrong!

Insta is just the 2020s version of some middle aged housewife magazine though. All perfect houses and housekeeping and bragging about life whilst battling some addiction to shopping or such. Boredom is boredom

[quote AmIoldbutdontrealiseit]@StarryNightSparkles Same, it was quite strong in my mind to not end up living what I perceived as a dull life. It’s only become slightly close since I became a mum (the fairly boring routines, cooking etc) and I took 40 years to get to that point, so I’m ok with that[/quote]
I understand Amlold 💖💐 although you will think I am nuts... we live with no structure or routine. We literally take each day as it comes.

do your shoes match your handbag...
fingernails/toe nails/lipstick same colour?? in many ways the 50s/80s thing seems..blissful.
it clearly wasnt.
but ..at least the men were forgiving.....
(isat the message?)
i watched it last year,am nearly 49. ...
unmarried,one adult one not high school yet ds's ..
absolutely loved the personified freedom..to just be....that sv projected
reckon can adapt that to whatever reigns you in.
egg n chips...is dinner tomo,n bread n butter.sos theres that.xxxxxxxxx

[quote MaybeHeIsMyCat]I remember reading this ages ago, it's interesting
[[https://www.boredpanda.com/past-young-people-look-older/?utmsource=google&utmmedium=organic&utm_campaign=organic]][/quote]
Blimey. There's some shockers there! Some people look a generation older.

Even Judy Garland in The Wizard of Oz, was 16 - and was meant to be 16, but she looked about 30.

Yeh I do think people look older when you watch old films , i think also maybe the styles back then / lifestyles made people seem older ? I work with people in there 40s and they seem to look so much younger than their age to me

Remember we’ve only really been big on spf for the last couple of decades or so. sun ageing will be a big factor in how much older people looked in years gone by.

@MaybeHeIsMyCat iv seen those before and they are insane !

I think the photos and styles make people seem old.
So women the same age as liz Taylor did their hair like her. And kept it.. so that hair style reminds us us of our nans.. so young women with it seem old.

@FavouriteMug

She didn't make egg and chips though.

She made chips and an egg.

Just been reading through the thread thinking "Chips and egg. Chips and egg."

Since when did our Shirl make egg and chips 🤣🤣🤣

@Everydaydayisaschoolday

I'm sure you look fabulous OP but plenty of women your age and even younger look still look dowdy nowadays. It's just a more modern style of frumpy. The modern equivalent of SVs look would be something like saggy leggings and a baggy T-shirt with a scraped back ponytail and instead of cooking egg and chips she'd be eating frozen pizza or pinging a ready meal. And this forum is full of posts by women who live lives of quiet drudgery married to bone idle men or women whose husbands don't 'allow' them out.

This. There is a modern style of frumpy, that's all.