Getting annoyed at virtue signalling on Facebook local groups

[Floogal]

Ignoring the fussing questions everytime a police helicopter is on patrol or fireworks. Where I live it's usually the same thing. Always along the lines of;

" I've got a lot of old tat but want to donate it to charity"
" I brought the homeless guy on the high street a coffee and had a chat with him"
And, this " how many homeless people are there in town? My (photogenic well dressed) twin daughters want to give out Xmas packages" obviously hoping to appear on the local news or "and finally...' on ITV news. Usually the 'ooooh aren't you wonderful' gushing replies. Gives me the raging arsehole.

A "friend" of mine on Facebook, posted pictures of herself with a homeless man she had delivered a food parcel to - he was holding a tin of tomato soup in each hand and had a slightly bewildered look on his face whilst she had a broad smile. I didn't think "isn't that kind if her?"... all I thought was "how on Earth will he open those tins; heat the soup; serve it & eat it??"

@CoffeeRunner

May I also add the "I haven't sent Christmas cards this year, I have donated the money to the local foodbank/cat rescue etc".

a) why tell anyone? Cards are not obligatory.
b) it's possible to send cards & also give to charity.

Lol. We do this. Every year. Always the food bank and if we can, somewhere else too. However, we don’t post it on social media. The only people I tell are the ones who send us cards because we add that money to the pot and I don’t want to offend any of our family or friends leaving them thinking we don’t care enough to send a card. Just realised I’m probably virtue signalling by telling you folks about it!

On ours we have the “please donate if you can, it’s such a small thing to us but means the world to them”. WTF? You the big feudal queen helping the poor peasants?!
And “if you kids were at the park today at 1h27, you should be so proud of them. They held the gate open for me, i said thank you and they replied you’re welcome!”… so you had a normal boring interaction with some kids in the park and then decided to post it on FB! You’ve already said thank you! What else do you want?! But then lots of people comment “such a wonderful story!” “Thank you for sharing”.
I dont know… maybe i’m just dead inside!

We get this a lot on our local Facebook page. Usually posted by one of the many trendy liberal types who have moved here from London wanting to help locals who can no longer afford to live here thanks to the soaring house and rental prices 🙄. They often start their posts with cringey phrases like “hive mind”.

I am so glad I don't let Mark Zuckerberg into my life and have never been on Facebook. It is possible OP, perhaps leave.

@Monkeymilkshake

On ours we have the “please donate if you can, it’s such a small thing to us but means the world to them”. WTF? You the big feudal queen helping the poor peasants?! And “if you kids were at the park today at 1h27, you should be so proud of them. They held the gate open for me, i said thank you and they replied you’re welcome!”… so you had a normal boring interaction with some kids in the park and then decided to post it on FB! You’ve already said thank you! What else do you want?! But then lots of people comment “such a wonderful story!” “Thank you for sharing”. I dont know… maybe i’m just dead inside!

You're not dead inside, just bored by the tediously dull everyday tasks/ conversations being converted into amazing wonders of the world by the gold star/ medal collectors.

@Realitea

I saw an annoying one recently. A lady took a photo of a load of lovely clothes in my daughters size. I’m pretty skint and thought I’d love to buy those if they’re going cheap. However the post said ‘my daughter has kindly said she would like to give these away to someone who is in need and doesn’t have much money. The person in highest amount of need gets them. No grabby people please as this is only for people who have nothing’ Lots of replies of ‘you’re so kind’ and how wonderful her daughter is but no one is going to want to explain their case to them and tell them how little they have just to prove to her! I’m not going to degrade myself to that.

I've seen posts like that and always thought how ridiculous and self-congratulatory they are. If they must be self-congratulatory, then at least they'd be so much better off selling the clothes/goods for a reasonable price with a statement that all proceeds were going to X charity for the homeless/woman's shelter/etc. That way no one has to degrade themselves.

@PearlyShamps

A "friend" of mine on Facebook, posted pictures of herself with a homeless man she had delivered a food parcel to - he was holding a tin of tomato soup in each hand and had a slightly bewildered look on his face whilst she had a broad smile. I didn't think "isn't that kind if her?"... all I thought was "how on Earth will he open those tins; heat the soup; serve it & eat it??"

Oh how I wish people would actually ask that under such pics ... "He's homeless; how is he supposed to cook and eat that?'

This is irritating

What about the ones that say: i received a phone call from a man who said he needed my bank card number and pin. He sAid he needed it to verify my covid passport

Just in case Anyone else receives this call. I think its a hoax

always love the ones that go...

Having a horrible time, so down, feel I've been gutted. Need prayers and good vibes only.

Oh no, what's wrong?

I just can't talk about it, it's too painful and personal.

@ghostmouse

Bank cards that get posted on our local fb pages do pretty much find their way back to the owner pretty quickly. It’s a good way of finding someone. Even if that person isn’t on fb chances are someone else will know that person anyway.

If this ever happened to me, I'd cut it up and cancel it after retrieving. The pictures with the half covered card number always annoy me, i think we all know what a bank card is, why the need to tell the world who i bank with. If someone has taken a picture of my bank card, I'm cancelling it, period, regardless of their good intentions

@Realitea

I saw an annoying one recently. A lady took a photo of a load of lovely clothes in my daughters size. I’m pretty skint and thought I’d love to buy those if they’re going cheap. However the post said ‘my daughter has kindly said she would like to give these away to someone who is in need and doesn’t have much money. The person in highest amount of need gets them. No grabby people please as this is only for people who have nothing’ Lots of replies of ‘you’re so kind’ and how wonderful her daughter is but no one is going to want to explain their case to them and tell them how little they have just to prove to her! I’m not going to degrade myself to that.

I would imagine that part of the pleasure for her would have been reading other people's stories of hardship and congratulating herself on being so very superior. Would enable her to discuss poor people's lives with her daughter ; ostensibly as a learning thing but actually as a means of self congratulation.

@WorraLiberty

YANBU but Mumsnet is no different at times, except those who want a pat on the back try to shoehorn their post into an 'AIBU'? question.

"I saw an old lady crying in the street and I stopped to ask what's wrong. A friend said I should've ignored her and now I'm doubting myself. AIBU?"

Yes, you should've kicked her in the fanny instead 🙄🙄

Exactly my thought, the idea of MN poking fun at/sneering at virtual signalling is so funny!

@Realitea

I saw an annoying one recently. A lady took a photo of a load of lovely clothes in my daughters size. I’m pretty skint and thought I’d love to buy those if they’re going cheap. However the post said ‘my daughter has kindly said she would like to give these away to someone who is in need and doesn’t have much money. The person in highest amount of need gets them. No grabby people please as this is only for people who have nothing’ Lots of replies of ‘you’re so kind’ and how wonderful her daughter is but no one is going to want to explain their case to them and tell them how little they have just to prove to her! I’m not going to degrade myself to that.

What, prove you're poor and needy?? Very Victorian! T*s

@PurpleCarpets

Gives me the raging arsehole.

I tend to get this more from vindaloo, could it be that?

🤣

The ones about people 'volunteering' at this time of the year, but not the rest of the year....actually you see it suggested on here when some DC are being brats...'take them to a foodbank/soup kitchen so they know how privileged they are' umm..I'm sure Dave the homeless guy who lost his home because of relationship breaking down and not being credit worthy or earning enough to get anything else is really appreciative that MC Hugo with sullen attitude is handing him food..

The charitable thoughts at Christmas always bug me. What about the poor sods the rest of the year. People's problems with poverty, homelessness, loneliness, etc don't just pop up mid December and vanish in January.
I wish people were more thoughtful all year round to those less fortunate.
The need to publish good deeds on FB just goes to show that they're likely one off "feel good" gestures.

Right up there with you. Social media full of "ooooh, I'm such a good mum", "look what I achieved" , "I'm such a good person". 🤮
Do your thing quietly ffs!

And “if you kids were at the park today at 1h27, you should be so proud of them. They held the gate open for me, i said thank you and they replied you’re welcome!”

My local one is full of this shite - have people lost the inability to thank people in person?

@thaegumathteth

I've just remembered the fashion a wee while ago for absolutely EVERY TINY THING being a sign of dog napping.

Someone walking past your house - casing it to dognap

A twig on your drive - a code for dognappers

A chalk mark on the road - 100% dognappers

Honestly I almost snuck out in the night to write STEAL THE DOG FROM HERE on peoples front doors just to clear up any confusion.

I almost snuck out in the night to write STEAL THE DOG FROM HERE on peoples front doors just to clear up any confusion

There's a woman here always on about dognapping - I should do this to her! (I wish someone would "nap" her - she's a bitch0

@DillonPanthersTexas

I get annoyed with the 'flytipping' posts. People leaving unwanted crap outside their house and asking people to 'help themselves' as if it was some kind of altruistic act rather then the owners not wanting to make a trip to the the dump or pay for a council collection. Seriously, who is going collect your rusted piece of shit broken BBQ or the ripped sofa that has spent a night outside in the rain. Lazy cunts.

We just leave ours outside in our yard near the wall and it invariably goes. The scrap dealers take all the metal, rusty or not. Clothes get taken, good luck if they need or sell them & this includes bags of clothes in council recycling bags. Ditto broken electrical goods. Anything that doesn't get taken, which is very little goes to the tip, in the bin or pay council to take. I love this thread, family keep asking what I'm sniggering at.

@CrapDrawer

I get annoyed by similar posts and also posts where someone has found a phone/ bank card/ jewellery and posts on FB to find the owner. What if they’re not on FB. Really annoys me. Take to local police station or send bank card to the bank! Always seems to be someone wanting a bit of glory for doing a good deed but not thinking of the best way to actually get an item back to its owner.

Sorry, what’s a local police station?

@middleager

"Here's my vegan NYE menu" Said person also sells homemade woollen toys.

A friend keeps asking if anyone has any time to spare to help a charity, yet is off work herself and doesn't appear to be volunteering there.

Family members posting lots of eco stuff, while posting pics of their real Christmas tree, crackers etc.

I’ve seen the ‘real Christmas tree’ swipe on here a couple of times. Pretty sure, on average, you’d have to have the same fake one for ~18 years before it equates to being as ‘eco’ as a real one.

We just leave ours outside in our yard near the wall and it invariably goes

Straight away or after a few days? Weeks?

It really looks shit when walking down the street and you see junk on the pavement outside someone's house.

Sorry, I digress!
YAS OP, it’s really starting to grind my gears after a year of it. The worst is the local ‘recycling’ group, which has become a competition for who’s the poorest, and the admins have gradually become some kind of pseudo-puritanical-wankbags.