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Original poster

To ask where you meet professional men?

542 replies

InsideMyBed · 16/12/2021 14:25

To people that have professional dh with high earning careers (over 100k salary Shock).

Where did you meet them and how did you get together?

Wondering because apart from consultant doctors and dentists that I interact with in clinical settings only, I don’t think I ever come across men who earn over 100k salary.

I feel like most people I know earn £18,000 - £55,000 at the most. I’m sure a few might be on £60k but £100,000 a year Shock. That seems like so much money to me. I’m a university graduate and most jobs in my industry pay between £25,000 - £35,000 a year.

Where do you meet men who earn over £100k a year? Apart from doctors, dentists and barristers. I’m a bit jealous I will admit because these are the kinds of men I don’t even have access to much less share my life with one! BlushShock

OP posts:
WorraLiberty · 16/12/2021 14:48

I’m a bit jealous I will admit because these are the kinds of men I don’t even have access to much less share my life with one!

Why are you jealous and how much do you earn?

gwenneh · 16/12/2021 14:49

I met DH through a forum for a shared interest, so online, but he made £25k at the time -- and I was a student, largely unemployed. We now both earn six figures. So I'd say it might be a mistake to set your sights for a high-earner out of the gate.

irregularegular · 16/12/2021 14:49

I know plenty of men in our village who I must earn over 100k in order to pay for the ridiculously expensive houses, private school, and wife who clearly is not high income. They work in finance/IT/property/entrepreneurship/medicine among others. In almost all cases they would have met their wives at Uni or in early days of work. Before they earned 100k+ but there would already have been good indicators. So it is kind of true to say that the best way to meet a high earning man is to be a high earning woman, by the time you are both high earning it is probably too late and they will be married. So it is more true to say that the best way is to start off on a potentially high earning Uni/Career path and catch them young. And quite possibly never become high earning yourself.

It is a strange question though and I wouldn't recommend it as an approach to a happy marriage and life!

OhNoWhatYouGonnaDo · 16/12/2021 14:49

My husband is a doctor. I met him through work, because I'm a doctor too (and actually earn more than him at the moment!).

Professional, educated men tend to prefer professional, educated women.

FireworkParrot · 16/12/2021 14:50

I find it a little odd that you would focus on meeting a man who earns that, rather than your own career prospects to enable you to earn that kind of salary.

I agree with this, does it really matter? It won't make you love them any more, at least it shouldn't!

FWIW my DH is a reasonably high earner (£85k). I met him online ten years ago when we were both graduates and both earned about £25k. His salary has taken off since then due to the field he's in (IT) mine has increased but I earn nowhere near that.

Original poster
InsideMyBed · 16/12/2021 14:51

@WorraLiberty

I’m a bit jealous I will admit because these are the kinds of men I don’t even have access to much less share my life with one!

Why are you jealous and how much do you earn?

Because there’s so much more you can do with a higher salary! Blush

I earn much, much less than £100k

OP posts:
PinkTonic · 16/12/2021 14:51

Surely most meet either at university or in the early career stage and although you aren’t high earners at that stage you know what your life goals are and that they align. It’s obviously going to be more difficult to meet people with a different social circle or on a different trajectory if you’ve already settled in a low paid job. The answer there is to focus on your own career path and development.

XelaM · 16/12/2021 14:51

Law firm

thepeopleversuswork · 16/12/2021 14:52

Professional, educated men tend to prefer professional, educated women.

This. To be honest, any professional educated man who wants a less well educated and less well earning woman is a bit suspect IMHO because they are probably looking for someone they can control and who won't outshine or challenge them in any way.

Babycham1979 · 16/12/2021 14:52

Consultants and dentists will typically be earning considerably more than that once you factor in their private practice. £100,000 isn't that exceptional these days, even if it is a 'high' salary.

As others have said, the best way to get a high earner is to be one yourself. What else do you think you have that other women don't that might appeal to a high-achieving man?

Pinapplecobbler · 16/12/2021 14:53

Dh works as a lead software engineer earning that, but when I met him he was unemployed and trying to make his own business (didn't work, lots of debt) and he's slowly climbed the ladder over the years.
You'd be crazy to go looking for dates based on wage, wages can end over night (firing, illness etc) or the person not earning much now might in the future.

girlmom21 · 16/12/2021 14:53

@InsideMyBed yeah but you don't get to do more stuff with somebody else's money. That's a shit attitude. I'm guessing you're early 20s? You can quickly rise through the ranks if you're willing to work hard. Not so much if you're just looking for rich men.

gunnersgold · 16/12/2021 14:55

My dh earns way more but we married young ish (25) and he has progressed in his career .

WorraLiberty · 16/12/2021 14:55

Because there’s so much more you can do with a higher salary! Blush

I earn much, much less than £100k

But you don't have a higher salary to 'do so much more with'??

What makes you think you're entitled to ponce off of someone else?

So they put all the hard work and study etc in, and you think you can just stroll up and start living off their money?

Bloody hell.

Thecatinhishat · 16/12/2021 14:55

Hi Op a high earning man here, my wife just passed me her phone to reply.

Guess what, I always lied about my income. Just so I avoided women like you!

mnp321 · 16/12/2021 14:56

University. In fact most of our group of uni friends married within the group. Most went down the law/financial services/corporate route and are now partners/directors at big firms. Many of the women out-earn the men though.

VladmirsPoutine · 16/12/2021 14:56

@Thecatinhishat

Hi Op a high earning man here, my wife just passed me her phone to reply.

Guess what, I always lied about my income. Just so I avoided women like you!

Why do people do things like this. It's intensely cringe-worthy.
Babycham1979 · 16/12/2021 14:56

@WorraLiberty

Because there’s so much more you can do with a higher salary! Blush

I earn much, much less than £100k

But you don't have a higher salary to 'do so much more with'??

What makes you think you're entitled to ponce off of someone else?

So they put all the hard work and study etc in, and you think you can just stroll up and start living off their money?

Bloody hell.

Possibly partly because there are always numerous women on MN and similar fora encouraging this kind of sponging attitude!
WorraLiberty · 16/12/2021 14:57

Professional, educated men tend to prefer professional, educated women.

And yes to this ^^ a million times over.

Unless you have a golden vagina and a face like a supermodel, blokes are going to (hopefully) see right through your gold digging.

minipie · 16/12/2021 14:57

@PinkTonic

Surely most meet either at university or in the early career stage and although you aren’t high earners at that stage you know what your life goals are and that they align. It’s obviously going to be more difficult to meet people with a different social circle or on a different trajectory if you’ve already settled in a low paid job. The answer there is to focus on your own career path and development.
This

I know lots of high earning men

They are mostly married to high earning or ex-high earning women

thepeopleversuswork · 16/12/2021 14:58

@VladmirsPoutine

Why do people do things like this. It's intensely cringe-worthy.

I usually agree with you but this OP needs a bit of a wake-up call on this one. The kind of man she's after would run a mile.

OublietteBravo · 16/12/2021 14:58

I met DH at university - we were doing our PhDs in the same department. Neither of us were rich at the time. These days (20 years on) we both earn 6 figure salaries.

WorraLiberty · 16/12/2021 14:58

@Thecatinhishat

Hi Op a high earning man here, my wife just passed me her phone to reply.

Guess what, I always lied about my income. Just so I avoided women like you!

Pass your wife her phone back

I want to tell her I'm cringing for the pair of you...

Original poster
InsideMyBed · 16/12/2021 15:00

[quote girlmom21]@InsideMyBed yeah but you don't get to do more stuff with somebody else's money. That's a shit attitude. I'm guessing you're early 20s? You can quickly rise through the ranks if you're willing to work hard. Not so much if you're just looking for rich men. [/quote]
I’m in my 20s and I don’t know anyone who earns anywhere near 100k! Blush. I’m prepared to date older. Like 35+ years old. I’m not interested in men in their twenties anymore tbh.

OP posts:
Fretfulmum · 16/12/2021 15:00

Most of my friends earn these amounts. They all either met at work or part of similar social circles. Men of this kind often marry similar women who earn similar and are on a similar career projectory (prior to kids anyway)

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