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AIBU?

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Original poster

No school for you today then?

331 replies

DinosaurStompGrrrr · 15/12/2021 21:59

Today in the bank I was waiting with my DC and the man in front of us turns round to us and says to us ‘No school today for you then?’

DC term has finished (yes, private school) but when I said they were on holiday, I was told that it was ‘generous’ of the school. Innocuous comment on the one hand but I still responded ‘no work for you today then?’. I just felt he would not have said this to a man on his own. It felt like he wanted to just put his view even if unwelcome or unnecessary…

OP posts:
WhatScratch · 16/12/2021 01:19

You have a bank? An actual physical bank that you can queue at?

MinnieJackson · 16/12/2021 02:00

Good for you! I would have done the same

MinnieJackson · 16/12/2021 02:03

@WhatScratch yes I do! And only a Lloyds in my town. I have to drive 15 or 18 miles if I wanna do anything that can't be done online. Tony town

Rosebel · 16/12/2021 02:14

Men can't say anything now without someone being offended o

Rosebel · 16/12/2021 02:17

Men can't say anything now without someone being offended or saying they wouldn't say that to a man. It's boring.
He made an innocent comment to your child and you were really rude to him. Of course he would have said it to a man. It was a bit of chit-chat.
Don't worry though he won't bother to try and be friendly to anyone again.

DinosaurDuvet · 16/12/2021 02:23

I don’t think he was challenging you, I think it was more polite chat directed towards the kids. And he probably would have said the same thing to if a man was standing with them. I couldn’t be annoyed at this.

Your reply made me laugh though lol

SmallBoyFury · 16/12/2021 02:41

How do some people actually make it through the day?

Are you tired, OP? Because being perpetually offended must be exhausting.

1forAll74 · 16/12/2021 02:48

Just friendly chat I would imagine., I don't know why people get in a tizzy about such things.!

GreenWheat · 16/12/2021 02:55

Good grief. People like you really make me worry about my sons' futures in society. People constantly looking for sexism and being rude to men for merely functioning in society....

Kokeshi123 · 16/12/2021 03:22

Unless there is a backstory about him saying the comments in a leery manner, there was nothing wrong with what he said.

Ladywinesalot · 16/12/2021 06:14

He was rude.
None of his business!

StarfishDish · 16/12/2021 06:17

He probably would have said it to a man as it sounded like he was just making conversation.

To be honest, these 'Would he have said it to a man?' threads annoy me more!

itsstillgood · 16/12/2021 06:25

Definitely don't home educate Grin

Holly60 · 16/12/2021 06:32

@DinosaurStompGrrrr

But why do older men need to challenge younger women? Would they say that to a man?
I don’t get why you are reading it as a challenge. I think you need to look to yourself and consider why you feel defensive about your children not being in school. It wouldn’t even have crossed my mind to read the comment as anything other than friendly chit chat. But then I’m a pretty self assured and confident, with no sense of needing to explain myself to others…
itsstillgood · 16/12/2021 06:33

Seriously it's just a standard conversation starter. It's one we must have had over 500 times over the years as mine never went to school. Whatever happened to small talk?

LittleBipper · 16/12/2021 06:41

Some bloke rode past us on a bike the other week and shouted "you should be in school!" at DS. Now that was annoying because no chance to reply! But yes I can confirm that fathers do get it too.

dotsandco · 16/12/2021 06:41

@DinosaurStompGrrrr

But why do older men need to challenge younger women? Would they say that to a man?

Haha! He wasn't 'challenging' you ffs! He was just making conversation! Nothing to do with you being a 'young woman'! 🤦‍♀️

I honestly despair at how offended some (young women!) people seem to get these days...it's tiresome!

ViceLikeBlip · 16/12/2021 06:45

I'm generally very grumpy taciturn by nature. But since I've known my FIL (who's just lonely living by himself, and who will take literally any opportunity to chat to anyone about anything) I've become less grumpy about strangers making small talk.

Notonthestairs · 16/12/2021 06:48

It wasn't a challenge. It was bland queuing chit chat.

I'd hope that there is something else bothering you and you deflected - otherwise It's all a bit professionally offended.

Notonthestairs · 16/12/2021 06:53

@ViceLikeBlip yes my Dad (widower) and FIL (carer for MIL who has dementia) are the same. They love going to Morrison's and the local garden centre because the staff will chat, they know whose kids are at university, who has car trouble etc.

Wineandroses3 · 16/12/2021 06:54

Your response was absolute class! Well done for saying that back to him. I know exactly what you mean.

MrsLargeEmbodied · 16/12/2021 06:56

a very common question,
you need to have an answer
yes - we pay for the education and yet there have more holidays! what a con

MarshaBradyo · 16/12/2021 06:56

@HangOnToYourself

It doesnt sound like he was challenging you tho, literally just being friendly and making conversation with your child
Agree
Benjispruce5 · 16/12/2021 06:59

Where was the challenge? Massive overthinking op.

1AngelicFruitCake · 16/12/2021 07:05

@GreenWheat

Good grief. People like you really make me worry about my sons' futures in society. People constantly looking for sexism and being rude to men for merely functioning in society....
I agree! Your children go to private school and presumably have a good standard of living. There are children who are off school because there parents are blaming Covid but just can’t be bothered getting out of bed! If they’re in private they’re already ahead of state children in terms of education (presumably) but you’ll have to teach and model resilience to them, including making conversation and getting along with Joe public!