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Original poster

To hate working with women

434 replies

HousethatChunkbuilt · 14/12/2021 18:27

I am a feminist and I think women are incredible. I am proud at all we achieve, having babies, periods, going through the menopause, the constant harassment, fear of violence, discrimination, sexism... the list goes on.
HOWEVER I find it incredibly difficult to work in all female teams. I have nearly always worked in all female environments in entry level jobs.
The bitchiness is unreal. Everyday comments lead to tears, meltdowns, refusal to come in. This has happened in every single workplace. The only place I haven't had this is in a shop where it was mostly men and other (quite mature) women. Oh and one place where we were all different nationalities, is cattiness a British thing?
It just takes so much time and effort navigating the various rifts, arguments, feuds and rivalries. I honestly think we'd rule the world if we could get rid of this shit.
I'm quite matter of fact and get frustrated that this taking up so much time!

OP posts:
otterlybonkers · 14/12/2021 21:23

Many people will get you op.

this is mn, so your sentence structure will be magnified and torn apart by the resident wino's. Those with nothing better to do than sit in sidelines, most likely loveless, waiting for a chance to pounce.

Considered and useful conversation has vanished from this site.

ZZTopGuitarSolo · 14/12/2021 21:24

Are the OP's experiences invalid?

No.

Does this mean the OP is right to say all female teams are bitchy and a nightmare to work in?

Also no.

Murphs1 · 14/12/2021 21:27

Absolutely agree, have worked in some mainly females teams and it’s been horrible, but currently the team I work in which is all women, and everyone is lovely.

loveablequalities · 14/12/2021 21:31

My current boss is a woman and I dislike the culture she has created (very mean girl stuff). The previous boss was an absolute nightmare who certainly caused the departure of several excellent members of staff with her batshittery. My boss before that was a pleasant but utterly incompetent young man, promoted well above his experience and ability, the one before that was an excellent, experienced, fair minded, intelligent man.

What do I infer from my experience?

It's got sod all to do with genitalia.

Veeveeoxox · 14/12/2021 21:31

I'm in healthcare since I moved to the secure wards it has been 50/50 mixed team and a wide range of ages. Which I believe leads to a more cohesive team when I worked on female dominated wards with mostly older staff I was bullied I believe because of my age.

Hopeishere52 · 14/12/2021 21:32

I work in predominately female work force and it is the most supportive and considerate I have ever worked in.

Constance1 · 14/12/2021 21:33

I've worked in female dominated offices all my working life and I've never come across what you describe OP. In fact I've never seen anyone (female or male) crying or refusing to come to work. Perhaps you bring out these bizarre strong reactions in people!

neveradullmoment99 · 14/12/2021 21:35

I agree. I work in a female dominated environment. There is lots of talking behind others backs, moodiness, bitchiness etc.

neveradullmoment99 · 14/12/2021 21:35

Oh and I am female!

AlfonsoTheUnrepentant · 14/12/2021 21:38

The worst people I have worked with were male and the best line manager I ever had was female. But I have worked with some horrible women, too.

Mary46 · 14/12/2021 21:39

I had nice experiences some not so. Some women can be very moody. I was tempingp last year and she would turn her back to me at lunch. It was rude. Sometimes just hard to fit in.. but worked with good fair Managers too

Ozanj · 14/12/2021 21:39

@HousethatChunkbuilt

I am a feminist and I think women are incredible. I am proud at all we achieve, having babies, periods, going through the menopause, the constant harassment, fear of violence, discrimination, sexism... the list goes on. HOWEVER I find it incredibly difficult to work in all female teams. I have nearly always worked in all female environments in entry level jobs. The bitchiness is unreal. Everyday comments lead to tears, meltdowns, refusal to come in. This has happened in every single workplace. The only place I haven't had this is in a shop where it was mostly men and other (quite mature) women. Oh and one place where we were all different nationalities, is cattiness a British thing? It just takes so much time and effort navigating the various rifts, arguments, feuds and rivalries. I honestly think we'd rule the world if we could get rid of this shit. I'm quite matter of fact and get frustrated that this taking up so much time!
Are you working in retail or entry level jobs? If so there will be an immaturity as these roles are often taken by younger people and are seen as ‘low status’ and so often attract people who can’t work elsewhere or who have long term designs on a promotion. You can’t ascribe the behaviour of either the men or women you work with to their sex - it’s probably their age causing the problems.
GoodPrincessWenceslas · 14/12/2021 21:39

I can honestly say I've never had this problem despite working in predominantly female teams all my working life. I suspect you have to look at the common factor in the places you've worked.

Forgothowmuchlhatehomeschoolin · 14/12/2021 21:41

I agree op!

reesewithoutaspoon · 14/12/2021 21:42

I've worked mainly female dominated profession and only ever seen it develop when management was weak and turned a blind eye to it. Usually it involved a clique, where one would get into a senior position and start allocating all the plum jobs to her hangers on and leave the others with the shit jobs. Staff turn over was high unsurprisingly.

AgathaAllAlong · 14/12/2021 21:43

Right so it's a specific kind of job, and at entry level, and only certain nationalities and only certain ages...... Doesn't sound like you mean women, sounds like you mean certain women you have worked with.

I used to think I "got on" with men better than women, then in my mid 20s I realised it was just internalised misogyny pushing me to think that I was better because I was "one of the guys" and not "one of those silly women". I'd repeat the 'women are just so bitchy' line too. Really it was based on a few experiences in high school, and the women I've met with an open mind have (obviously!) been diverse, kind, interesting, capable. I don't say this to be patronising but just for another perspective.

DropYourSword · 14/12/2021 21:45

There are women who can be very catty - I just avoid that kind of drama in the workplace.

I am a feminist and I think women are incredible. I am proud at all we achieve, having babies, periods, going through the menopause, the constant harassment, fear of violence, discrimination, sexism... the list goes on.

^ I do find it incredibly strange to list periods, menopause, harassment, fear, discrimination and sexism on a list of women’s “achievements”!!

Thelnebriati · 14/12/2021 21:49

Yes, I thought that.

LastSummerHere · 14/12/2021 21:55

OP my husband works in an all male environment and the drama is endless. I hear allllll about it. Beta males trying to be alpha, alphas trying to keep their position...he says there is a LOT of jealousy. He has left group chats and speaks only to them on work related matters. He has also reported a colleague for sending disgusting images of women in group chat.

One female member of staff is based in another country and my DH breathes a sigh of relief whenever she is on Slack as she is professional, calm and efficient with no time for men butting horns.

Don't buy into the misogynistic crap about women as if men's shit doesn't stink. It does.

TrishM80 · 14/12/2021 22:03

"I am proud of our periods and the menopause"??!!

Confused
WhoKnew19 · 14/12/2021 22:04

Honestly this hasn't been my experience OP and I'm sorry it has been yours. Really hope you find a nice group of supportive women to work with one day.

I have worked in single and mixed sex teams in my career. Honestly I think people are people, regardless of sex. I have worked with very difficult people of both sexes, and my favourite boss of all time happened to be a woman. My worst was a man, but it hasn't put me off male bosses, or made me assume all female bosses will be fab either. I think you can only really take people as you find them.

HaaaaaveyoumetTed · 14/12/2021 22:16

@JurgensCakeBabyJesus

I work in a profession rather than 'entry level roles' , and it's mainly women..I don't recognise the behaviours you describe, maybe this isn't admit the sex of your team mates, but about the environment/nature of the work
I agree. I work in a female dominated profession and don't recognise this at all.
BurntO · 14/12/2021 22:19

I’ve literally never seen this outside of a playground

LadyTiredWinterBottom2 · 14/12/2021 22:27

I have had a couple of difficult bosses and both were female. Unfortunately this can happen either weak management not addressing it. However l have also seen some very unprofessional behaviour in male dominated environments. Again, if it goes unchallenged...

AwaAnBileYerHeid · 14/12/2021 22:36

I'm a nurse and I'd say 85% of my colleagues are female. It is a very bitchy environment.