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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

warning at work for swearing

141 replies

Slavetolove · 05/12/2021 18:49

I was called into the office for a warning the other day. I'm a support worker and was speaking to another member of staff when clients were in their bedroom. I can't even remember the conversation at all but I think I said the world fuck/fuck off but not towards the staff member, it was just in conversation.

I swear, but I'm strict on myself to not swear in front of clients. The member of staff reported me. I was ripped a new one. Because the clients were in the house it was meant it was around them and because its their house. The owner had a huge go at me saying there would be no way I would be allowed to swear in his house.
one member of staff said she said "bloody hell" in front of a client yesterday but nothing was said.
im so embarrassed. I'm bloody good at my job.

OP posts:

Haggisfish3 · 05/12/2021 18:51

Sorry, I swear like a trooper but never at work.

Floralnomad · 05/12/2021 18:51

You should be embarrassed, it is thoroughly unprofessional. You shouldn’t be swearing at work at all .

AnyFucker · 05/12/2021 18:51

You deserved it, sorry

Helpstopthepain · 05/12/2021 18:53

Your manager is right, you swore in a clients home which isn’t acceptable.

It’s concerning that you don’t see the problem.

Original poster

Slavetolove · 05/12/2021 18:54

I do see the problem! I'm just so embarrassed. Its never happened before.

OP posts:

grapewine · 05/12/2021 18:55

Yeah, that's not OK.

AnyFucker · 05/12/2021 18:56

You mean you’ve never sworn before at your place of work or never got into trouble for it ?

LonginesPrime · 05/12/2021 18:57

Because the clients were in the house it was meant it was around them and because its their house.

That's fair enough - lesson learned.

I know it feels shit to be told off, but it's not a judgement on all the other aspects of your job that you do well - just that one thing you need to rethink.

I would swear at work in private informal situations with colleagues who also swear, but never in more formal/public situations or anywhere a client/visitor/work experience student, etc might hear me. I'd definitely expect to be disciplined if I did.

Original poster

Slavetolove · 05/12/2021 18:57

iv never sworn, especially around clients! I can't think of anything worse.

OP posts:

MrsTimRiggins · 05/12/2021 18:58

Oh dear. I guess it’s because you know really you’re in the wrong but the attempted deflecting is so childish. Sorry you’ve had a bad day but I’m not surprised you had a warning.

EightWheelGirl · 05/12/2021 18:58

If nobody but your colleague heard or cared then she’s being a bit of a knobhead IMO.

Tal45 · 05/12/2021 19:00

It's probably not ideal although I assume you knew no one would hear as they were in their bedrooms.

First I wonder why the staff member didn't just say to you 'don't swear' they didn't really need to dob you in for this IMO as it wasn't in front of clients and secondly I don't know why the manager had a huge go at you - that's not a professional way to handle anything!! Pretty ironic to be unprofessional in his handling of someone being unprofessional. He should have told you swearing was not appropriate at work and to not do it again or given you a warning but 'having a go' at you is not the way to handle it.

iklboodolphrednosedpaindear · 05/12/2021 19:00

one member of staff said she said "bloody hell" in front of a client yesterday but nothing was said

Bloody hell is nowhere as bad as fuck / fuck off!

AnyFucker · 05/12/2021 19:08

Lesson learned then. Let it go now.

Seashor · 05/12/2021 19:15

I think they’re being a bit high handed on you. Your colleague didn’t have to report you, they could easily have just said something to you at the time. No one else heard. You clearly didn’t mean to do it, you sound very upset about it but I honestly think, no harm done. I’d be upset too but please try to move on or think ‘fuck em’ and leave!

ArthurTudor · 05/12/2021 19:15

Going against the grain here...I might be wrong but you swore during a conversation to a colleague, (not at the colleague) the clients could not/did not hear.

I don't think it's a big deal. You colleague sounds like a jobsworth

supersop60 · 05/12/2021 19:16

What AnyFucker said.
Don't do it again.

WonderfulYou · 05/12/2021 19:17

I think it’s an overreaction.
I work in a school and most of the staff swear all day long. As long as it’s not in front of the kids then it’s fine.

I don’t swear very often anyway but the one time there was a severe incident and I shouted “shit” in front of a room full of teens and I didn’t even get a warning.

EdgeOfTheSky · 05/12/2021 19:22

God I hate this thing if reporting stuff like this to your manager.

They could just have said ‘steady with the swearing at work, OP’

harper30 · 05/12/2021 19:23

I completely disagree with PPs, if you swore in that context, I don't see why your work care. I swear all the time at work as long as I'm only with colleagues and it's not about someone or at someone.
I wouldn't worry about it, obviously your work are super uptight you'll just have to be careful in future but don't feel bad about it!

HangingDitch · 05/12/2021 19:24

Take it on the chin and learn from it.

Bettybantz · 05/12/2021 19:26

Do people really not swear at work? Our lot are a right sweary bunch. Probably not when dealing with the public though

gofg · 05/12/2021 19:27

God I hate this thing if reporting stuff like this to your manager.

So do I, it's pathetic. However, some people seem to have so little going on in their own lives, and I guess this gives them a feeling of power.

Rosebel · 05/12/2021 19:30

I swear at work sometimes but only with colleagues. If I did it in front of a customer it wouldn't just be a telling off but a formal warning.
On the other hand if no one but your colleague heard I can't even understand why she reported it. It seems a bit petty when she could have just spoken to you.

GetTheFlockOutOfHere · 05/12/2021 19:31

@gofg

God I hate this thing if reporting stuff like this to your manager.

So do I, it's pathetic. However, some people seem to have so little going on in their own lives, and I guess this gives them a feeling of power.

This. ^ How pathetic. @Slavetolove Just take your slap on the wrist and say sorry, and don't swear again. Who was the arsehat reported you? What a horrible sneaky git.

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