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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

warning at work for swearing

141 replies

Slavetolove · 05/12/2021 18:49

I was called into the office for a warning the other day. I'm a support worker and was speaking to another member of staff when clients were in their bedroom. I can't even remember the conversation at all but I think I said the world fuck/fuck off but not towards the staff member, it was just in conversation.

I swear, but I'm strict on myself to not swear in front of clients. The member of staff reported me. I was ripped a new one. Because the clients were in the house it was meant it was around them and because its their house. The owner had a huge go at me saying there would be no way I would be allowed to swear in his house.
one member of staff said she said "bloody hell" in front of a client yesterday but nothing was said.
im so embarrassed. I'm bloody good at my job.

OP posts:
mam0918 · 06/12/2021 15:44

@newtb

Fuck is a verbal assault, and you can be arrested and charged for using the word in a public place.

I know I've used it myself, at the side of the coffee machine about my mil, but it was in a very informal chat to a very good friend who also had problems with her mil.

Fuck is an expressive word that can be used in a multitude of suitable ways very few of which could be used as an 'Assault'.

What makes you classify 'fuck' as the offensive part of an assault?

If I was to say for example that someone was 'a stupid fucking middle-class snob' how is fuck the offensive word?

Would therefore saying 'a stupid middle-class snob' suddenly not be an assault?

But in your example exclaiming out loud 'Oh fuck, I forgot to turn the landing light off this morning' is in your mind somehow an 'Assault'?

Surely the 'attack' in my example is from the words 'stupid' (meaning lacking intelligence) and 'snob' (meaning a person with an exaggerated/false sense of superiority) as those are the words that are purely negative in connotation and therefore the 'assault' not 'fucking' which is simply an expressive word.

Your post just seems like you must have a confined and limited vocabulary and understanding of word usage.

WhiskersPete · 06/12/2021 15:47

Your colleague is a snake in the grass. Who honestly runs to their boss over swearing?

Lavender24 · 06/12/2021 15:47

I'm in the minority here but I think it's all very OTT. I can't believe your colleague reported you.

TenPenceMix · 06/12/2021 15:49

Your colleague is an arsehole

AryaStarkWolf · 06/12/2021 15:49

@EightWheelGirl

If nobody but your colleague heard or cared then she’s being a bit of a knobhead IMO.
I agree
WhenSepEnds · 06/12/2021 15:50

It is unprofessional, I don't think there's really any denying that BUT your colleague could have just told you to leave the language down and let that be an end to it. I think they over reacted and have now probably just made the atmosphere uncomfortable at work

HunterHearstHelmsley · 06/12/2021 15:56

I work in a very sweary workplace. I have to remind myself in the real world that I can't just say the c word whenever I fancy. I did used to work with someone who would report you if you swore... He didn't last long.

Take the warning on the chin (as everyone else has said) and do not trust that colleague.

Flipflopblowout · 06/12/2021 16:03

@harper30

I completely disagree with PPs, if you swore in that context, I don't see why your work care. I swear all the time at work as long as I'm only with colleagues and it's not about someone or at someone. I wouldn't worry about it, obviously your work are super uptight you'll just have to be careful in future but don't feel bad about it!
I don't see why your work care? Because while you are at work you represent the company
AdmiralCain · 06/12/2021 16:19

It's the member of staff that grassed you up's fault. We have a strict Snitches get stitches policy at my work place.

BabyPotato · 06/12/2021 18:09

Your colleague is a dick. I can't believe they've actually gone and reported you for swearing. Obviously if you swore in front of a client it would be different, but people swear and dropping an F bomb whilst having an informal conversation with a colleague really isn't a crime. If the colleague found it offensive they could have just told you then and there instead of being a snitch.

hangrylady · 06/12/2021 18:15

Your colleague is an absolute bellend for reporting you. I swear constantly at work but my cat doesn't seem to mind.

TractorAndHeadphones · 06/12/2021 18:26

Given the amount of shit you have to put up with for crap pay an employee swearing - once is the least of their problems!
Whoever reported you is a dirty snitch and I hope that they get their comeuppance.

User14273895 · 06/12/2021 18:26

Everyone has things go wrong at work sometimes (although you wouldn’t know it from some of these responses!). It doesn’t mean you aren’t good at your job. It means you made one slip up, which you’re very unlikely to do again.

Be gentle with yourself. You’re not a terrible person. It’s just one of those things Flowers

TractorAndHeadphones · 06/12/2021 18:27

Also where I work we swear all the time. If we wanted to be polite we’d be project managers :)

Ugzbugz · 06/12/2021 18:48

How dramatic! People at my work swear all the time including me, no I wouldn’t tell my boss to fuck off etc but no one would grass someone up for that and i work for a big corporate company.

onelostsoulswimminginafishbowl · 06/12/2021 18:57

I'm in NZ and swearing is everywhere. They even swear on the radio in the morning. It's taken a while to get used to that! Sometimes I find myself being all British and unamused 😂

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