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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

warning at work for swearing

141 replies

Slavetolove · 05/12/2021 18:49

I was called into the office for a warning the other day. I'm a support worker and was speaking to another member of staff when clients were in their bedroom. I can't even remember the conversation at all but I think I said the world fuck/fuck off but not towards the staff member, it was just in conversation.

I swear, but I'm strict on myself to not swear in front of clients. The member of staff reported me. I was ripped a new one. Because the clients were in the house it was meant it was around them and because its their house. The owner had a huge go at me saying there would be no way I would be allowed to swear in his house.
one member of staff said she said "bloody hell" in front of a client yesterday but nothing was said.
im so embarrassed. I'm bloody good at my job.

OP posts:
frecklemcspeckles · 05/12/2021 19:32

I was at a hospital appt recently. One of those ones where you're sitting around during treatment for a few hours. The HCAs were at a workstation on a ward with around 5 or 6 patients all getting their treatments. One of them swore constantly as they talked about their work and I remember thinking it was such a bad look when elderly unwell folk were around. I think your colleague was probably a bit ott reporting you if noone was actually around but it's possible they think you may do it in front of residents too which isn't right. I'm sure you're so embarrassed now but hopefully you'll remember never to do it again.

RicherThanYew · 05/12/2021 19:34

I'm slightly impressed by your employer Op. I work for a care company where the care workers (the term preferred by the MD) literally refuse to provide a client with lunch or make him dinner and the manager does jack shit. The swearing here doesn't even warrant a discussion Grin

VladmirsPoutine · 05/12/2021 19:35

I can't believe you were reported!

ClaudiusTheGod · 05/12/2021 19:37

I was ripped a new one

Horrible phrase

BurbageBrook · 05/12/2021 19:38

God what a precious pearl clutcher your colleague was to report you.

SenecaFallsRedux · 05/12/2021 19:41

@Bettybantz

Do people really not swear at work? Our lot are a right sweary bunch. Probably not when dealing with the public though
Not at my workplace. I'm in the Southern US, though; it's really not at all acceptable to swear in any place that I have worked.
blubberyboo · 05/12/2021 19:43

Forgive yourself and move on.

The colleague maybe felt they had to report it as the owner had a go at you so they might have brought it up.

You obviously feel bad. If you feel uncomfortable working there then look for a new job but don’t beat yourself up for too long

Almostmenopausal · 05/12/2021 19:43

That's shocking that your colleague went running to your boss to 'tell on you' for saying a naughty word, like a little school girl!

"Mr Boss, {OP's name} said fuck....." 🤨🤨🤨🙄

Viviennemary · 05/12/2021 19:44

Clean up your language. If you swear constantly as a matter of course in every day life it will inevitably slip out without you even thinking.

Thefuturestory · 05/12/2021 19:45

I’d be looking to leave if a fellow colleague couldn’t raise something direct with me at the time and went running to management. That kind of atmosphere is toxic.

PivotPivotPivottt · 05/12/2021 19:48

I can see the management's point telling you not to swear. Sounds like they overeacted though considering it was in private but still fair enough to ask you not to. I can't believe your colleague told on you though. That's what's most embarrassing in this story.

sweeneytoddsrazor · 05/12/2021 19:49

Pretty mean thing of your colleague, only reason I can think of is maybe they were covering their own back in case the client had heard from the other room and reported both of you.

MichelleScarn · 05/12/2021 19:50

It's good that you are taking the responsibility, but the reporting directly to management without even having a chat with you is awful.

CristinaYangismySpiritAnimal · 05/12/2021 19:50

The colleague who reported you is a dick.

user1999952776 · 05/12/2021 19:50

Don’t worry about it, just forget it and move on and be careful next time

inmyslippers · 05/12/2021 19:53

I find this really bizarre I worked in care for years and have never known anyone to get Into trouble for swearing. Gallows humour and straight talking seemed to be the norm

audweb · 05/12/2021 19:54

@harper30

I completely disagree with PPs, if you swore in that context, I don't see why your work care. I swear all the time at work as long as I'm only with colleagues and it's not about someone or at someone. I wouldn't worry about it, obviously your work are super uptight you'll just have to be careful in future but don't feel bad about it!
They were in someone’s house. That’s why it’s not acceptable.

Listen I worked in care for years. Swearing in the office fair game, swearing in someone’s house even if they were in a different room, not on. They might have been able to hear. Just accept it and move on.

DroopyClematis · 05/12/2021 19:55

If you're in a client's home then you really should be minding your language.

Maybe your colleague hates swearing?

Take the reprimand and move on.

eightlivesdown · 05/12/2021 19:59

Overreaction and don't think much of the colleague who reported you. It's not as if you swore at the clients, or even within their earshot, or at your colleague..

topcat2014 · 05/12/2021 19:59

I am intrigued by these colleagues that run to tell teacher..

But, OP, I am afraid in your sector it is probably bang to rights.

Mind you, I used to work in a factory setting where polite language began with an F, and it was just C words that were frowned upon.

RandomUsernameHere · 05/12/2021 20:02

Was it within earshot of the client though? If not then I think the reactions of your colleague/manager are over the top. People swear in my office all the time.

SGChome20 · 05/12/2021 20:02

Hang on, so no clients heard this yet your colleague still felt it necessary to report you??? That seems absolutely nuts to me and I’d be quite offended that they couldn’t just say ‘Susan, shut up, you know that’s not appropriate’

GucciBear · 05/12/2021 20:02

About time swearing became a no no and not a go to! By the way, your comment about ........... a new one is very coarse. Probably best if you don't trot that out whilst at work!!

Lalliella · 05/12/2021 20:03

Your colleague is a grass and a knob. I wouldn’t trust them again after that. Yes you shouldn’t have done it but it’s hardly crime of the century.

AutumnLeaves21 · 05/12/2021 20:03

Gobsmacked at the voting results op! Can’t believe you were reported. Your colleague needs to get a grip, it’s a word you never murdered anyone.