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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be pissed off my husband lost his wedding jacket?

459 replies

Terribleluck · 04/12/2021 03:09

He went on his Christmas do and not only did he decide it was on to walk home 2 miles in not the best weather (I still can't believe his friends would let him do that) but he lost our wedding jacket, that does make very, very pissed off/sad.

OP posts:
Tzimi · 05/12/2021 18:43

@Terribleluck

He thinks he only went to two places, but he can't remember when he took it off or if he dropped it, etc... His workmates always like to get him drunk, because he becomes the clown.
It might be worth asking at the places where he went, maybe the staff found it & kept it?
MooPointCowsOpinion · 05/12/2021 18:43

Urgh I really hate how some women come on here to take the time to reply simply to be a dick to the OP.
How you get the energy to be so judgemental about tiny things like wotsits I have no idea.
OP I probably wouldn’t have been happy about the lost jacket either, because I wouldn’t want to have to replace his “going out” outfit. I’d be absolutely fuming at the putting himself in danger stumbling home drunk, losing his bonus and his car keys.
He has a pattern of irresponsible behaviour linked to alcohol, losing his licence, falling off a boat, needing you to Bath him after a night out, the DUI… I would ask him to consider his relationship with drinking and if it’s time to put some boundaries in place between him and the people he drinks with.

HareHare · 05/12/2021 18:46

I understand you are upset. In my experience it is always better to wait until someone sobers up and then commiserate with them whilst letting them know how concerned you were. I hope he decides not get drunk in situations where no one is there to keep him safe. I am glad he found the jacket and hope the bonus was intact. I hope you are able to get over this and he learns a lesson

Paganfreya1988 · 05/12/2021 18:49

Was your OH upset losing it? Or more scared of the wrath of you😉

I would be more concerned walking back two miles especially if on his own. So many creepy people about

Pascal80 · 05/12/2021 18:53

@MichelleScarn

What was the bonus to physically lose it? Cash? A cheque? Why wouldn't it just be a BACS payment?
Christmas bonuses are often still paid in cash in an envelope - why is it so hard to understand? I have never been paid a Christmas bonus by BACS. It's a gift given in person by your employer. Not that hard to understand.
Tigger1895 · 05/12/2021 18:54

First it was the jacket, then it was him getting drunk, then it was him walking home, then it’s the fact you have a dinner party. So what exactly is annoying you? Sounds like you are using the jacket as an excuse, and if the babysitter cancelled how were you supposed to pick him up?

Americano75 · 05/12/2021 18:57

I haven't read all the replies but it sounds like the jacket isn't the main issue really, it's his drinking.

Jack80 · 05/12/2021 18:57

He needs to call where he was re trace his steps. He was careless but is safe and well.

BlusteringBoobies · 05/12/2021 19:00

Once again, HE HAS FOUND THE JACKET AND CAR KEYS AND BONUS

Thread resolved yesterday

Pascal80 · 05/12/2021 19:15

@JHMJHM

Totally missing the point of the thread but noticed so many people saying 'anyways' instead of 'anyway' at the moment. Is it a thing? Regional?
It's an Americanism. Mainly from Texas is where it started originally. British people are copying what they see and hear on TV. Monkey see Monkey do.
Mandyjack · 05/12/2021 19:16

It's a jacket, at least he made it home.

whynotwhatknot · 05/12/2021 19:27

forget everything else he went out again ths morning driving the car back after only 5 hours when he stopped drinking and hes had a dui ban before

hes disgusting

mumof2exhausted · 05/12/2021 19:35

He didn’t do it on purpose. Honestly I do think you are being unreasonable (completely over the top) to be brooding over it and not being able to sleep

MegaClutterSlut · 05/12/2021 19:37

Sounds like your husband needs to stop bloody drinking. Its not down to his mates to make sure he gets home safe because he gets shitfaced everytime. He's an adult, the only one to blame is him!

Wheresmywoolyjumpers · 05/12/2021 19:37

It is not like he set it on fire and danced around it! It is a sad thing but an accident.

Notmrsfitz · 05/12/2021 19:39

Crikey are you his mum or his wife?

He lost a jacket, he walked home, his friends got him drunk.

You sound a lot of fun.

TwoLeftSocksWithHoles · 05/12/2021 19:52

I feel for you, we lost our treasured Engagement Hassock when the RSPCA, assuming it was part of the cat's paraphernalia, took it away when the cat (sorry, no photo) was repossessed. Sad

MamaKatja · 05/12/2021 19:53

That's nothing. My father lost his wedding ring. So my mother got him a new one, which he also proceeded to lose. They were still mostly happily married for 44 years.
I'd let this one go.

Roxy69 · 05/12/2021 19:55

@StoodOnAPlug

This seems to be a bit darker than a lost jacket.
Absolutely
wowzer1 · 05/12/2021 20:08

ok. i not sure why you got yourself in such a state over a jacket. yes some sentiment but it not his wedding ring is it. and why are you blaming his friend. am sure your husband is very capable of making his own decisions. i think tlollj right u didnt want him going out in first place and now using these incidents to get back at him. i would apologise to him for getting het up over nothing and laugh about it.

Santina · 05/12/2021 20:17

My husband has lost two wedding rings, hey ho, I'm not buying him a third. It wasn't intentional like I'm sure your husband didn't intend to lose a jacket.

SawdustandHay · 05/12/2021 20:26

@Santina

My husband has lost two wedding rings, hey ho, I'm not buying him a third. It wasn't intentional like I'm sure your husband didn't intend to lose a jacket.
Get him tattooed!
fussyhousewife · 05/12/2021 20:27

Material things are insignificant in the scheme of things. He arrived home safe and sound (probably a little worse for wear). I would be happy for that.

youvegottenminuteslynn · 05/12/2021 20:36

Can't control himself once he starts drinking, to the extent he has previously been banned for drink driving, but continues to drink the same way. The jacket stuff was OTT but I think it probably comes from a place of it being hard to respect someone who keeps making bad decisions that are immature and quite weak, based on previous (DUI conviction is no joke). Conscious I had my life almost ruined by a drink driver and am still recovering a few years on so my response to these things is more emotional than most people. I can't respect drink drivers at all. It's such a stupid, selfish, needless thing to do.

maybloss2 · 05/12/2021 20:49

Hi op, I would be invested in my own clothes, but not my partners. I had a phase where I liked wearing men’s hats, but lost several cos I forgot them usually at a pub. I bought my ex a ‘designer’ jumper that then got slightly shrunk in the wash, that upset me but it was me that shrunk it!😆 and I’m afraid if your bloke is that easily led astray is he really an adult? But that’s another issue.
I’d be more pissed off if I’d been waiting around for my partner to turn up. I hate making an arrangements for it to be walked all over cos the other is a bit drunk. The worry, the waiting it’s like being in a thriller with too much suspense. I’m not good with that!

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