Why would you not want a heated blanket?

[Swanfairydust]

I live with another person and they have been working from home all day. The heating has been turned up to 23/25 degrees (I can see from the app). I didn’t think it was partially cold today - between 8-10 degrees but I have been told my spare room can get cold.

The thermometer is usually kept in her room but it was in the living room for a few weeks (she was away, didn’t want it kept in her room).

As the radiators were turned down low the temperature didn’t increase in the living room and as a result her bedroom radiator has been on full power all day (there is no tmv).

I have told her to put the thermostat back in her room (third time of asking, so this time it was

outside her room and told h

So your lodger does no cleaning, no cooking, watches your tv in the lounge and heats the whole house instead of just their room while wearing t shirt and shorts?

Sounds like they've got it good!

What does she eat, takeaway or are you cooking for them?

Hi op , to save the drama simply put her rent up. I’m sure she will understand and be happy to pay to be warm

@Swanfairydust A completely different slant on it, but I wouldn't want a heated blanket because I can't bear being hot.

However, your lodger evidently doesn't suffer from being too hot.

I can't believe that people think you are being creepy and controlling. It's your house. Okay, so she's paying towards your bills. But if you want your own space with a lock on your own door and so on, you need to pay more and rent a self-contained flat/bedsit/whatever, not a room in someone else's house. If it's your house, you have a right to go in. Not to snoop (which would be weird and creepy), but definitely to look at the radiators/thermostat.

I think you need to have a really honest conversation with her. If she wants her space to be so hot that she can swan around in shorts and a t-shirt, she's going to have to make a significantly higher contribution to the bills - not just a token gesture. If she's there more than you are, and is using the heating more, she ought to be paying more than you.

This would piss me off immensely, not least as I can't stand over-heated houses. Someone upthread said they have their house at 18 degrees overnight (!) Mine isn't 18 degrees even during the day. I put the heating on if it gets to 13 or so, and not at all at night.

My XH had the heating on all the bloody time. It was one of many annoying things about him. The DC are the same when they come home.

If you want to reduce your bills, do you really need the heating at 16° when you're in bed? We have ours just on frost protect at night, which is set at 7°. Yes, it can be a bit nippy if you go to the loo in the night, but that doesn't take long and you soon get warm again.
Sounds like you have Hive or something similar - check if it has a 'Ready By' setting, so if you set it to be eg 20° at 7am, it will learn how long it takes your house to get to that heat and start the heating at the appropriate time.

I wouldn’t use a heated blanket. Did you not do GCSE Science? Electric current induces a magnetic field. Do you really want to be wrapped in a magnetic field? It’s unhealthy and a cancer risk.

I hate heated blankets. Bad enough in bed but if I were trying to work, it wouldn’t be any use at all.

Clearly you don’t like her. Just kick her out and get someone who will follow all of your rules no matter what they are.

Even with a heated blanket you can feel cold in your hands etc.

@WarmthAndDepth

Meh. When I was wfh during the school closure last Jan-March, I just put a thick cardigan on and a pair of slippers. 8h approximately in front of the screen every day remote teaching, marking, planning and setting new work and heating staying at a comfortable 18C. No need for cranking it up like your friend is; especially if she's burning fossil fuels to achieve it.

This. ^

We have the heating at no more than 18-19 C ever. Not even when it's really REALLY cold. We don't need to have it any higher than that. In the mid 20s inside the house would kill me. Even my DH who feels the cold more than me can have it at no more than 20.

We do have a 3 bed bungalow though, with a boiler that is less than 10 years old, and it gets warm quick and stays warm for HOURS. Our gas bill is quite low too, compared to many I have heard about/read about.

@Swanfairydust I think YANBU in one way, as I think your flatmate needs to just wrap up a little bit more, and not have the temperature in the mid 20s, but you can't really expect her to work all day wrapped in a heated blanket!

But, YABU in other ways. As a few posters have said, you going in and out of her room is really out of order. I have to agree with the posters saying you sound like a pretty ropey, disrespectful 'landlord' and I do pity anyone who is your 'lodger.'

SO I did vote YABU, because you are coming across as quite rude and obnoxious, and that is probably why your lodger has little respect for you.

I don’t get the angst- she’s offered to pay more, take it and leave her alone

By the way, I would hate a heated blanket and have never had one. Really rude to just expect her to use it

I see the story of Bob Cratchett and Scrooge is alive and well in 2021 this Christmas 🤣

Bank statements don’t show a break down of how many units are used.

Err...I know.

I wrote 'to see how much (money) you pay' them (after you've been billed). You can see a history what (amount) you've been paying.

The bill comment (to compare units when other bills come, not with the bank statement) was separate from the bank comment.

Or do you know how much money you've been paying after every bill?

Anyway, as said earlier, you can suggest £10 or so a week for her to pay if you have no access to your bills or don't know how to check payments history with your bank statements.

@MsThinksAlot

Bank statements don’t show a break down of how many units are used.

Err...I know.

I wrote 'to see how much (money) you pay' them (after you've been billed). You can see a history what (amount) you've been paying.

The bill comment (to compare units when other bills come, not with the bank statement) was separate from the bank comment.

Or do you know how much money you've been paying after every bill?

Anyway, as said earlier, you can suggest £10 or so a week for her to pay if you have no access to your bills or don't know how to check payments history with your bank statements.

As I said before, I didn’t pay monthly. Bills were generated when I provided readings.

@kikipie

I don’t get the angst- she’s offered to pay more, take it and leave her alone

By the way, I would hate a heated blanket and have never had one. Really rude to just expect her to use it

Have never used one and yet hate them? Don’t know you are living.

@BoredZelda

I hate heated blankets. Bad enough in bed but if I were trying to work, it wouldn’t be any use at all.

Clearly you don’t like her. Just kick her out and get someone who will follow all of your rules no matter what they are.

Standard MumsNet response…. Kick out, break up, I would never do that, I’m faultless

[quote Swanfairydust]@MsThinksAlot I also didn’t pay bills monthly, I would submit the readings and then pay. It was with Green and they would bill me straight away.

I think it’s good to take daily readings so at least I have a rough idea what the daily cost is going to be. It’s currently £4 just for gas. So maybe using the dyson heater (very efficient) might be better on some occasions.[/quote]
Daily readings is good.

Regardless of how often you paid, if you still paid by credit or debit card, you can look at bank statement and check what you paid them and see by how much it (the money you paid, not units) increased when she came to live with you or during the colder months.

Just wondering how you'll work out exactly how much she should pay even with daily reading, without knowing what you used to pay or how many units you were using before this. That's the point, isn't it?

@BarbaraofSeville

YANBU to be annoyed at someone who leaves heating running in empty rooms and heats her room to ridiculous temperatures while wearing summer clothing. £10 a week extra probably won't touch the sides over winter with electric heating and rising energy prices.

Your plan of 21 in the daytime and 16 at night is perfectly reasonable and within recommendations for a comfortable heating level that is neither wasteful nor mean.

Plus it's incredibly wasteful and simply tone deaf in an age when we all need to be more mindful in our use of energy, whether or not we can afford to pay for what we use. It's also perfectly reasonable to expect people to dress for the weather and to put a jumper and socks/slippers on before whacking up the heating.

I don't know what the solution is though. It could be that you're simply incompatible on your views on heating. Has this person ever had her own bills and had to pay for heating out of her own money? Sounds like maybe not, as you tend to be more receptive to moderating your usage when that happens, unless you have a large disposable income and don't care about being wasteful.

This. Absolutely.

I know I would hate it as I can’t stand direct heat on me. That ok with you?

I have more sympathy with the lodger every time you post

@AnFiadhRua

Ask her to move out. It really annoys me when my teenagers have tshirts on and the heating has been on all day. Bit different i know. But it is frustrating. I cant ask my dc to move out but this would not be something i could tolerate from a lodger.

Won't have that either. No need to move but unless they're paying the bills too or I can magic money out of thin air, they have to be reasonable and put some clothes on before we crank up the heating, if they're still cold.

@kikipie

I have more sympathy with the lodger every time you post...

Also

@Swanfairydust

Kick out, break up, I would never do that, I’m faultless...

the more you post, the more it sounds like you're winding us up.

I Don’t think you are being wierd or creepy or anything like that. I’d be thinking and behaving exactly the same. Gas and electric are massively expensive at the moment and I don’t blame you for trying to minimise them.
I think you need to carry on doing the daily reading and see what the actual problem is. I suspect £10 a week won’t be enough.
I also think you need to be crystal clear about what is and isn’t ok. Normally you wouldn’t have to do that but she seems like she needs to be told as she clearly doesn’t give a shit.

Have you got a smart meter?

@DontBeCatty

I Don’t think you are being wierd or creepy or anything like that. I’d be thinking and behaving exactly the same. Gas and electric are massively expensive at the moment and I don’t blame you for trying to minimise them. I think you need to carry on doing the daily reading and see what the actual problem is. I suspect £10 a week won’t be enough. I also think you need to be crystal clear about what is and isn’t ok. Normally you wouldn’t have to do that but she seems like she needs to be told as she clearly doesn’t give a shit. Have you got a smart meter?

You would behave like this? Go into your lodger’s room to try and catch her in a lie about having an electric blanket? When she had already offered to pay more so she can use the heating?

Dp is WFH and feels the cold. Wanted the heat on constantly even in summer. DD and I were sweltering. So when the electric blanket broke - it had 2 separate wire circuits one of which failed- I took the good circuit and stitched it into a soft throw to make an office chair heater. Everyone’s happy. He’s warm, the blanket has been recycled making me feel positive about adopting sustainability where possible, everyone is comfortable and the heating is on a sensible amount.

I think YABU. Buying her the heated blanket was quite a passive aggressive act. If you suggested it to her as an option, that would be one thing e.g. "Would you consider using a heated blanket? I use one myself and I find it really good." But buying one and presenting it to her is a bit over the top. Not to mention entering her room (which really should be a private space) to check if she really did buy her own heated blanket. She probably told you she'd bought one already because she knew she wouldn't use it and didn't want it to go to waste when you could use it yourself or give it to someone else. She didn't want to be rude and say, "Actually, I don't want it".

There's no harm in trying to monitor/reduce your heating bills. In fact, it's quite a sensible thing to do. But since your tenant is prepared to pay more for any increase in heating costs arising from her preference for a warmer house, I don't see why you'd have a problem with this. It would be different if you were dealing with teenage children who don't contribute financially towards your housing and heating costs - in that scenario, it would certainly be irritating to see them crank up the heating while they're wearing t-shirts and shirts and not bothering with jumpers or fleece tops. But your lodger isn't a teenager - she's an adult and as such, she can wear whatever she wants.

You've said she's a good housemate/lodger otherwise and if her rent is helping with your housing/bills costs, then I'd back off a bit and leave her be.

@Taytocrisps

I think YABU. Buying her the heated blanket was quite a passive aggressive act. If you suggested it to her as an option, that would be one thing e.g. "Would you consider using a heated blanket? I use one myself and I find it really good." But buying one and presenting it to her is a bit over the top. Not to mention entering her room (which really should be a private space) to check if she really did buy her own heated blanket. She probably told you she'd bought one already because she knew she wouldn't use it and didn't want it to go to waste when you could use it yourself or give it to someone else. She didn't want to be rude and say, "Actually, I don't want it".

There's no harm in trying to monitor/reduce your heating bills. In fact, it's quite a sensible thing to do. But since your tenant is prepared to pay more for any increase in heating costs arising from her preference for a warmer house, I don't see why you'd have a problem with this. It would be different if you were dealing with teenage children who don't contribute financially towards your housing and heating costs - in that scenario, it would certainly be irritating to see them crank up the heating while they're wearing t-shirts and shirts and not bothering with jumpers or fleece tops. But your lodger isn't a teenager - she's an adult and as such, she can wear whatever she wants.

You've said she's a good housemate/lodger otherwise and if her rent is helping with your housing/bills costs, then I'd back off a bit and leave her be.

No I didn’t enter her room to look for a heated blanket, I went to her room to check the radiator was working, because I paid for that to be changed.

@Scrumbleton

Dp is WFH and feels the cold. Wanted the heat on constantly even in summer. DD and I were sweltering. So when the electric blanket broke - it had 2 separate wire circuits one of which failed- I took the good circuit and stitched it into a soft throw to make an office chair heater. Everyone’s happy. He’s warm, the blanket has been recycled making me feel positive about adopting sustainability where possible, everyone is comfortable and the heating is on a sensible amount.

Yes that’s what I’m thinking….. I’m the same at work, just about everyone has heaters, wearing coats and they are still cold. Surely it’s better to direct heat at the individual via their seat?