What time do you lie in until?

[Rosebel]

What time do you think is an acceptable lie in time if you have young children? No plans or anything for the day but 11:30 is a bit of a piss take isn't it?
I would say 9 is a lie in, what do others think?

Context is everything

DH gets up for work mon-fri at 430 so 6am is a lie in for him. We have twins under a year old who get up between 5am-6am and an older child. We both work full time in the week. We don't really have time for a lie in if we are going to get everything done that needs doing in a weekend

I've never really understood the whole lie in rota to be honest - seems it just breeds resentment when it isn't followed. Life can feel planned enough when you have kids without throwing that in the mix too. If neither takes the piss you shouldn't need one - sometimes I'm too awake for a lie in other times I'm exhausted from working and travelling all week. If I then had to think oh it's my turn/not my turn for a lie in irrespective of what the previous working week was like for either of us then that's just another thing to add to the stress of parenting 🤷🏻‍♀️

7am is a long lie in in this house. Usually up at 5.30am ish weekdays and weekends. If someone lept in until 9am I would assume they were gravely ill!

@30whatacrock

Anything after 8am would be a piss take if you have kids. To stay in bed until half 11 is very lazy. The day is half over by then.

How is it a piss take if both parents like the shared lie in arrangement?

So what if you've spent 4 hours of the day having some time for yourself once a week? If there are no real plans, it isnt a waste at all.

I find it quite hard to sleep in beyond about 9am. Combination of habit and being a lark.

My DD is 11 now but is still a ridiculously early riser (6am usually). In the past two years or so I've been able to give her a tablet when she wakes up in the morning for an hour or so. If my boyfriend stays over I might sleep in until 8.30am -- 9am but any later than that feels like a bit of a waste tbh.

[quote Cheeseycheeseycheesecheese]@NovemberNovemberDarkNights it lovely, until we don't take the sheets off and change the bed Sunday afternoon and get into a crumb filled bed Sunday night (happens way more often than I care to admit 🤣)[/quote]
🤣🤣that's what memories are made of!

They grow up far too fast!! (The children anyway, the fathers...not so much 😩)

I think it’s more about having equivalent free time. So if he’s having a lie in until 11.30 but that’s too late for you to want to stay in bed then you get up and go and do something for yourself. An exercise class/go for a coffee/shopping.

Hate the competitive early crowd ‘ooh 4.30am is a lie in for me’. Doesn’t make you better people.
Annoyingly society is designed for larks not owls.
I’d love to go to bed at 9. But I wouldn’t sleep until at least midnight so it would be a waste. Everybody has different sleep requirements.

Anything after 8am would be a piss take if you have kids

Why ?
How is restoring your energy a waste of time ?
Many people don't get enough sleep - may be working until late, or it might be having to get up early during the week or it might be pulling a double shift to bring much needed overtime into the family, or it might be disturbed nights due to the child or children waking in the night. There comes a point when most people's bodies could really do with a catch up.

To stay in bed until half 11 is very lazy. The day is half over by then

Well, the maths of that rather depends on what time you go to bed.
However, when our dc were little, if I'd got up early with the dc I'd have been quite frustrated if dh also got up at 8am if we didn't have to be anywhere. To my mind, if he wanted to get up early, then I could have got some much needed sleep after getting by on a bare minimum during the last 2 or 3 weeks.

Any time after 7 is a lie in for me

Very strict turn taking in this house.
DC are up at 7 on the dot.
Lie in until 8.30. 9 latest. Anything over 9 would get a raised eyebrow.

10am is a lie in for me. I'm a night owl as I want to unwind after a hectic day taking care of a hyperactive toddler. Dh usually gets up Before me and prepares breakfast for dc and I just try to close my eyes and try to catch up on sleep. When single though, 8:30am was a lie in for me as I had so much to look forward to and now I just feel it's going to be the same shit on a different day doing boring crap so there's nothing to look forward to, yay another fucking trip to the freezing cold park or yay can't wait for soft play. I can't wait to get out of bed and live through another day full of tantrums and destructions counting the final seconds before putting dc in bed at night before unwinding 😭

8am is not a lie in! Everyone championing the “lazy lie ins” and “waste of a day” jargon clearly have very nice circadian rhythms tailored to the morning.

Most nights I don’t sleep until 1:30am, on a bad night it’s 3:30am. I have tried for years, the best I’ve managed is 12:30 while being really strict with my bedtime routine. I still have to get up for work in the morning. I am exhausted by the weekends!

Yeah I wouldn’t count waking up before 9.30am a lie in

I’m a night owl though and rarely go to bed before midnight despite small children and working.

I have dc and often get up at midday (or go for a nap later in the afternoon). I don't sleep very well though so if I'm not working I catch up with it during the day. Everything that needs doing still gets done and I still have plenty of time with my kids and husband.

I miss sleep so much.

OH regularly sleeps in until 11 most days, hasn't given me a lie- in in years. The closest thing to a lie-in I get is letting our four year old play on the tablet while kicking, wiggling and randomly squealing in bed next to me with ear plugs in and a pillow over my head.

Our older children are also late risers, so hopefully in a few years...
Meh.

There’s only one toddler to care for in your case, so I think, if you’ve no plans to go out as a family, anytime up to noon is fine. Why wouldn’t it be? 🤷🏻‍♀️

They do. But… I am a night owl (see time of post). I also have young kids. They wake up 6am. You can’t choose to be a night owl if that routinely leaves your partner with 5.5 hours childcare because you can’t get up. Obviously if it’s turn taking thats different.

Sigh. That was in response to person who said these threads always insult night owls.

@user1471457751

These threads always bring out the people who think there is some kind of moral failing in being a night owl.

Agreed.

When I had small kids anything after 8 was unheard of. But there are days now where I sleep in until mid day if I have no kids and no plans. And I love it. I’m naturally a night owl. I do my best thinking and planning at night.

My in-laws are the laziest people on earth. She was desperate to see DC for a walk, who was only weeks old, so I said I’d drive to her house for 10.30 on say a Tuesday morning for a walk. She replied that this was too early and they’re not usually up til 12 if I could make it then. Bearing in mind I’m the one with the baby and the routine to follow here, meanwhile they have no job or reason to be needing a long lie every day of the week! Out of principal I said I was busy and couldn’t, forcing her to have to say she’d get up for 10.30 🙄 but nope, instead she said we’d do it another day then! I have made absolutely no effort since, lazy lazy people 🙈

We get up at 8 and I’d be lucky if we made it to 9 on a weekend

@Rosebel

I suppose it is my choice to get up at 9 but our son is obviously in to everything and I always feel guilty if my husband is doing it on his own (he is capable of doing it alone but I still feel guilty).

Well stop feeling guilty. That’s what’s being a martyr. The kids are fine with their dad. Lie in properly and don’t get up when it’s his turn. He’s more than capable.

@sarah13xx

My in-laws are the laziest people on earth. She was desperate to see DC for a walk, who was only weeks old, so I said I’d drive to her house for 10.30 on say a Tuesday morning for a walk. She replied that this was too early and they’re not usually up til 12 if I could make it then. Bearing in mind I’m the one with the baby and the routine to follow here, meanwhile they have no job or reason to be needing a long lie every day of the week! Out of principal I said I was busy and couldn’t, forcing her to have to say she’d get up for 10.30 🙄 but nope, instead she said we’d do it another day then! I have made absolutely no effort since, lazy lazy people 🙈

We get up at 8 and I’d be lucky if we made it to 9 on a weekend

Why does her sleep pattern make her lazy? I often don’t get up until that time on days off, but I also regularly work til 3am. I have had 2 days holiday since 2018. I just don’t function well in the morning.

@user1471457751

These threads always bring out the people who think there is some kind of moral failing in being a night owl.

100%. Us night owls always get a hard time, lie in for me is when I wake at the weekend.

I am almost completely retired so don't wake up at ungodly hours any more. I slept badly quite often and have trouble going to sleep, so I tend to sleep longer in the morning. I usually am awake by 8 but I read until close to 9 before getting up.

I fell quite slothful and lazy to be honest.

Latest I'd lie in is 8.30am. Kids are 4 and 7.

' Lie in time'' when you have kids really depends on what time your kids wake-up. Me and DH were lucky in that all of our children loved their sleep and lie ins as much as we did.

At weekends no one would be up before 10. Sometimes later. Even Christmas Day.