What time do you lie in until?

[Rosebel]

What time do you think is an acceptable lie in time if you have young children? No plans or anything for the day but 11:30 is a bit of a piss take isn't it?
I would say 9 is a lie in, what do others think?

I do all the nights with our baby who doesn't sleep so I do lie in until 11.30 or so or else I'd get no sleep at all.

then its not the lie in that's the issue, its the piss taking husband.

@Cheeseycheeseycheesecheese

In a Saturday ds is with my parents, so dh and I usually get up around 10am. Sundays ds wakes me around 6ish but gets in bed with me and dh for an hour or so, usually downstairs by 8am. We leave dh in bed until 10ish, by then ds is claiming "daddy wants coffee and toast" so I help him make it, take it all upstairs and ds gets back in bed with dh to eat toast 🤦‍♀️ I have about an hour to myself to snuggle with our dog.

@Cheeseycheeseycheesecheese

Sounds lovely 😊

There are obviously 2 separate things here.

It seems op you expect your dh to behave like you in terms of when you would get up after a lay in. This will lead to a lot of resentment. So lay in yourself till 11.30, go down get a coffee go back to bed and read.

Second. Do not let him guilt you into getting up earlier as he claims he “can’t” hear. You need to sit down as grown ups and tell him if he continues to play this tactic there will be consequences and follow through with them.

If you do anything else you’re fucked

If I do get a lie in u usually get up around 9 or so but thinking maybe I shouldn't.

But it sounds like this is a choice you're making, rather than something your DH is forcing on you.

If you want to stay in bed later, then do it. I tend to get up around 9am too, but I'll make coffee and croissants and take them back to bed for an hour. It's bliss :)

I don't think the time matters as long as both parents get a fair opportunity to lie in OR whatever they prefer.

I do all night wakings with the baby, DH let’s me lie in on Saturdays and Sundays to catch up a little. I sleep to about 9 or 10 at a push if it’s been really rough. It’s not fair on the older kids to lay around in bed to nearly lunchtime on the regular. On occasion is fine obviously.

We alternate weekend days but neither would still be in bed past 9.30. DC are allowed to jump on the sleeping parent if it gets past 9.45.

So nice to see so much mention of lie-ins on here and not the abomination that is lay-in. I do not produce any eggs when I get to have a longer sleep.

Really does depend on so many factors...when the DC were youngish primary school age, they'd wake...I'd give them breakfast then they'd watch TV or play in the playroom and I'd go back to bed and watch some tv!

Around 10am, when we was young mum used to leave cereal out for us why we watched kids TV programs. When we was old enough we used to take her up a tea. As a adult people always comment on how well I make tea and coffee lol. I find if getting up 5am for work it's had to sleep in passed 9-10 to at least day 4of time off work.

Husband and take it in turns as 3yr old wakes at 530am. Latest we stay in bed is usually 8-8/30am.

I don't see the point in getting up till the sun is over the yard-arm. If I can't have Bailey's in my morning coffee, it's no kind of day off anyway.

I'm up at 6.30 Monday to Friday so any later than that is a lie in really. I'm usually up between 8 and 8.30 at the weekend.

8am gives me a two hour lie in compared with a workday, more than that would mess with my sleep routine.

I suppose it is my choice to get up at 9 but our son is obviously in to everything and I always feel guilty if my husband is doing it on his own (he is capable of doing it alone but I still feel guilty).

We get up at 6:45 on week days and a weekend lie in is 8:00 - 8:30 am. There have been the very oddest of days when I’ve still been in bed at 9 but they are so rare. My dog likes a walk. My kid is up around 8 and pops into the bed for a hug and a chat! When I was married my irritating ex would lie in bed all bloody weekend if I’d let him.

My dd (4yo) gets up at 8:30 (gro clock turns to sun) and we alternate lie ins on the weekend. This weekend i stayed asleep/upstairs until 11:30, its my child free time. DH had his lie in this morning and came down at 9:30.

Basically if we have no plans, whoevers turn it is for a lie in can stay upstairs until they are ready to come down basically 🤷🏼‍♀️

DH and I take a morning each at the weekend and we're allowed until 11am to lie in, watch TV, work out, whatever we want. Works well for us.

Stop being a martyr
It doesn’t help you or anyone else. Or at least if you’re going to have all that mum guilt. At least realise not everyone else is like that.

How am I being a martyr? I don't expect everyone to be like me which is why I asked what time was reasonable. That's it.

@user1471457751

These threads always bring out the people who think there is some kind of moral failing in being a night owl.

This.

@NeverTheHootenanny

About 9:30 is the latest standard lie in time in our house, we take it in turns. 11:30 is taking the piss if you have young children who are up early, that’s half the day solo parenting! I would be wanting some time to myself in the afternoon as recompense.

Huh? Many people "solo parent" all the timw. 🤣

Weekdays we're up 6-6:30. Often have plans on a weekend that require getting up by 7. Today had no plans (very very rare for a Sunday) so got up at 8 which is very late for us.

I usually go to bed about half 10.

I love having teens as we get to stay up late and sleep until late.
We are not wasting the day as we are all night owls.

@Rosebel

I suppose it is my choice to get up at 9 but our son is obviously in to everything and I always feel guilty if my husband is doing it on his own (he is capable of doing it alone but I still feel guilty).

Why do you feel guilty, though?

Your DH is just as much of a parent as you, and I bet he doesn't feel guilty about you getting up early on his lie-in days.