To be furious and upset with friends- what do we do

[0verth1inker]

I’ll try and keep this brief.

We (me, DH and DC age 4 and 2.5) were meeting friends (couple with DC age 8 months) at a Christmas light walk through thing around 1 hour 15 from where we live last Sunday eve at 4:30pm.
They booked tickets I transferred money (£62)
We get there at 4:25, message saying we are here will wait in car so we can all go in together as you have tickets
Response 4:35 ‘so sorry running late! We left about 45 mins ago won’t be long’
Rang x 2 eventually answer, asked if they will send us the e tickets so we can get in. ‘No no we are 10 mins away’
DC getting bored, wound up, want to go in. Text them asking to send tickets.
They Arrive 5:15. None of us allowed in as we have missed our slot.
We are raging, kids are crying we all take the bloody long journey home having to get a Maccies to cheer kids up.
We message asking for the money back, they say it’s ‘just one of those things, ridiculous they wouldn’t let us in’

They’re good friends but I am raging. It’s entirely their fault, they are v PFB and he woke up late from his nap then wanted a super long feed which is why they were late. How do I ask again, and firmly? They are unreasonable right??

Why would you not just send you the tickets in the first place?! Seems ridiclous on their side.. they're being unreasonable, you're deffo not!! X

@MichelleScarn

They can rebook and pay for all, if they had any decency you wouldn't need to ask.

THIS...

Your dc matter too...be a bit difficult with them for future bookings, depends on how your dc can cope, might not fit in with their schedule etc.

They owe you the money back end of

I’d give them a wide berth! No thought to disappointing your kids of the day out ....decent friends would’ve been mortified and refunded you without you even asking ...plus short text to you re the refund...let them go...

It's one thing your friends being flaky, but quite another that they don't send on the tickets, then basically tell you to suck it up. This would be a deal breaker for me - either they rebooked or paid me back, or I'd cut them dead.

Write this off, but in future don’t let them book anything on your behalf.

You shouldn’t have to ask for the refund they should have offered. I wouldn’t class them as friends for doing that. Understand they were late but they should definitely apologise and give you your money. To say it’s just one of those things???!

So cringe that they didn't instantly apologise and transfer the money!!

Cancel the cheque

@0verth1inker

I’ve had a reply! ‘Money should be with you’ which sure enough it is. It’s a v short message with no xxx’s which is unusual so I think they are annoyed but 🤷🏼‍♀️. I’ve rebooked for mid week next week. They can definitely afford it (combined income >110k even with mat pay) so I don’t feel too bad.

That makes it worse! £62 is nothing to them. A decent friend would have repaid you without having to be asked. Ditch them...

Why oh why didn't they send the tickets? What an extraordinary way to behave! I'd be super apologetic if I were them. As others have said, if you want to remain friends you may have to drop it. That said, they have behaved thoughtlessly. An apology would help and as others have said, a refund because you missed the event due to their lateness.

True friends would have offered you the money back straightaway. These aren’t good friends. They’re no loss. Insist on your money back

@Iamthemaid

I think you may end not being friends if you pursue this, although you are totally in the right!!

I agree Do you still want them? You are totally right. They should have refunded immediately AND bought the McD’s.

[quote 0verth1inker]@RampantIvy I have it don’t worry .
Re: feeding she was breastfeeding so couldn’t do it in the car. He doesn’t eat food really or take a bottle so is still bf almost entirely as his food/drink source. Nothing against bf (I did it myself for my two) but I think that’s a large part of why they are so limited by the baby, they are still in ‘feed on demand’ mode so if he’s hungry everything drops until he’s fed which can take up to an hour. This must be frustrating for them too so I do try and sympathise![/quote]
How on earth would they cope if they had an older child to collect from school and the pfb suddenly 'decided' it was hungry at pick up time! They need to get a grip!

@CambsAlways

They owe you the money back end of

RTFT!!! They did refund

Holy crap. They left you waiting in the car nearly and hour and wouldn’t send you the tickets you’d paid for! And you drive 2.5 hrs to get there and back. That’s no joke. What selfish arseholes, I wouldn’t want to have friends like that. I couldn’t look them in the face again without remembering how shit they treat other people. They didn’t even apologise, let alone give you your money back (which they should have offered) when you asked!

@Yogalola

Write this off, but in future don’t let them book anything on your behalf.

Cancel the cheque 🤦🏼‍♀️

It sounds like you aren’t going to get over this very soon. By pushing it you risk offending them, by not pushing it you are going to be bitter about it. Either way it’s a loss loss situation.

Oh dear! Im raging on your behalf. I hate late people

Surely with something like that you get there a bit before your time slot

Also, having been to this event (or something similar) it's totally inappropriate for an 8m baby anyway

I think there just are utterly selfish people like this, so wrapped up in the PFB that they give no thought to anyone else. I had my DC young and experienced a lot of this when friends had their first DC much later. Often they're pretty selfish and entitled at the best of times. Personally I'd write them off after this - but perhaps you're nicer than me!

@1FootInTheRave

Glad you got your money back.

They sound absolutely pathetic.

This.

I would be furious that they didn't send the tickets as asked.

Your poor children.

They sound really self absorbed, and No, not all first time parents would be so selfish.

I would be furious at having my day ruined having got us all there on time.

It would be a never again from me.

Well done for getting the money back.
If it was £20 I would want it back.

Complete CF's to boot.

My close friend was running late for a fireworks display and sent the tickets they second they knew they'd be late. That's what friends do...

I’m most shocked by the fact they didn’t immediately offer you the money back. You would then probably been magnanimous and gone halves!! As it is, whatever the outcome you’ve lost friends (though real friends would treat you differently). They don’t pay you you’ll seethe, if they do refund you it’ll be with bad grace and you’ll seethe.

I'm fuming for you. Glad you could rebook! I hate when people are late. I'm always on time even with a baby/toddler