To think she should replace my son’s bike

[Ofcrapface]

So I have a cousin I was very close with growing up. She has had a few issues and has hurt me in the past but she was like my older sister growing up so I’ve forgiven her when she hasn’t even asked for forgiveness. I don’t know if this is clouding my view but yeah.

My cousin recently moved nearby with a massive garden, I live in a flat. My little boy loves bikes and had a new one for his birthday. I went to her house one day for a bbq and took his bike so he could play with his cousins. We left and forgot the bike, I asked her to put it in the shed so I could come and grab it. I asked her a few times if I could come round with the intention to pick up his bike. She was always busy, some time went on and I admit I forgot it was there.

I recently went round to her house for a celebration and I noticed the handles were missing off the bike. She never ever ever disciplines her children no exaggeration so I can imagine her child broke it and that was that. I never said anything at the time as didn’t want to ruin the celebration. Now I’m thinking to ask her what happened and can she please replace the bike?
BTW my son is only 1 so it’s a balance bike

@HeckyPeck

I can't believe some of the responses on here.

If a friend/family member left a child's toy at your house and you were too busy for them to come and collect it, would the ones saying OP is unreasonable really just let your kids break it?!

My friends/family have left things at my house before and I just put them away safely until they can collect and vice versa.

If one of my friends/family left something and it got damaged because I hadn't bothered to put it away, I would offer to replace it.

The OP said that she had issues with her cousin and initially said cousin's children were poorly disciplined.

Unfortunately with people like that you are "surprised" if you get anything you "forget" back in one piece if at all.

Other people who have manners would contact you to remind you to pick up the item, or visit you and bring it along.

@Ofcrapface

Yeah I get that I shouldn’t have left it there. But if anyone left anything at my house I wouldn’t let it get ruined etc. Or I would at least say I’m really sorry xyz happened.

I will replace it for him, it wasn’t a much loved toy that he went without, he has cars, ride on bikes and it is a balance bike that he scoots along on.

But you know she's not you? So why didn't you collect it earlier?

It's all on you, I'm afraid.

If the are very small they might not even realise that it’s not theirs to play with if it was in their shed. I’d investigate getting replacement handles and maybe ask for the money for those.

You people are laughably awful 🤣

@CrankyFrankie

You people are laughably awful 🤣

???

@CrankyFrankie

You people are laughably awful 🤣

What for telling the OP she shouldn't expect better from her cousin?

When someone shows you who they are believe them the first time.

Common decency is not to abusing family expecting them to act as an unpaid storage facility

Seriously, abusing family by leaving a toddlers balance bike in a bike shed Truly ludicrous to see that as abuse, this here is the problem

@Thinkbiglittleone

Common decency is not to abusing family expecting them to act as an unpaid storage facility

Seriously, abusing family by leaving a toddlers balance bike in a bike shed Truly ludicrous to see that as abuse, this here is the problem

She didn't politely ask to store something for x amount of time at cousin's house.

She ditched something without permission for months on end and expected cousin (who she don't even like or respect) to not only take complete responsibility for it (when she never agreed to or was even given the option) but also getting offended they would have the audacity to use it (you must keep my stuff but dont dare think your good enough to touch it) and now pay for it (legally a laughably ridiculous thought process).

OP is showing her privilege (being able to buy these things and then forget she even owns them) and entitlement (inconvenience others on a whim and then demand money with no legal reason for stuff she is so privileged she didn't even remember owning and abandoned)... OP comes off looking awful here.

I think your history with the cousin is clouding a lot of your thoughts here.

Purely focusing on the bike - if a relative of mine abandoned a 1 year olds bike in my back garden, then left it there for 2 months, I'd assume they weren't that fussed about it. And if said 1 year old was anything like mine were at that age, I'd assume the baby didn't give a shit about it either. Mine were pretty "out of sight, out of mind" at that age.

Focusing on the cousin - You're carrying years of resentment over being taken advantage of/ignored/talked down to. You (in your mind) tried to contact her about the bike, and yet again were ignored/brushed off. And then when you finally got your hands on the bike, it was damaged.

I think it's time to either:
A: Start being a whole lot more assertive.
B: Distance yourself significantly from this woman who has been mean towards you since you were literal children.