To feel utterly depressed and hopeless about the cruel world we live in

[Sosocold]

What is the world coming to? So many cases of child abuse and cruelty - there's so much of it around.
Plus, parents being killed whilst children asleep upstairs, asylum seekers stuck in freezing cold woods for weeks on end, no food or milk for babies. A humanitarian crisis in Afghanistan... I could go on. what World are we living in?! Surely every life is as important as another, but it seems not. Where's the help for these people, what can we do to help?!
Sorry for the depressing rant, I just feel utterly hopeless this morning.

@HarrietsChariot

Surely every life is as important as another, but it seems not

This is the crucial mistake. Why start from the assumption that all lives are equally important? It's illogical. Is Colin Pitchfork's life equally as important as that of a nurse barely keeping herself sane in the face of long hours and seeing the damage Covid can do day after day? I'd say the nurse's life is of more value because she is doing good, whereas Pitchfork is just a manipulative murderer.

We can't change the world and we can't make it a fair place to live. Deep down you know this, otherwise you would sell all your belongings and devote your life to helping those less fortunate. The device you typed this post on could be donated to someone who can't afford a computer. The time taken to write it could have been spent fundraising or working in a job so you could give the money away.

Accepting the unfairness and cruelty of the world is the key to a happier life. Making yourself miserable doesn't do a damned thing to help those you are upset on behalf of.

What an incredibly selfish, unfeeling post.

The world has sadly always been like this it’s just that with modern communication systems and social media it’s information readily available.

Completely agree with pp. In many ways the world (parts of it anyway) are infinitely more equable and peaceful than they ever were. Medical science is incredible. Child abuse is punished severely when proven and widely reviled. I've taught history for years and some of the historical sources I've read have been shocking to the core. Appalling cruelty and perversion treated as acceptable.

@DillonPanthersTexas

Mother Teresa would be the last person I would be taking moral guidance from.

So true. Very dubious individual.

I have found that my mental health is much better since I have stepped away from the news and tabloids. I have found a cause I enjoy (women's rights) and follow lots of related groups and people on Twitter and so inadvertently get news about that from Twitter and also from here on the Feminism board. But everything else I may hear about and choose to ignore. Occasionally I will Google something but it's increasingly Rare. I know that something horrific has been in the news this week and I Anatoly will not be googling it as I know it will send my mental health diving down and I just can't cope. I KNOW there are monsters in the world, I don't need to read about it. Instead I try to make a small difference every day by being nice, thanking people, donating to charity and helping out friends and family.

You're not alone OP. I saw something bloody horrible yesterday and I feel completely traumatised. I'm so tired.

That news story is devastating. I cannot read about it or watch the clip but I have seen enough to be deeply troubled by it.

Once upon a time, you'd only know about bad stuff in your own vicinity. Your village, the nearest town etc. Now you can find out about the most awful things happening anywhere in the world, almost in real time, often with photos and videos.

Your body experiences that as if it's stuff that's happening near to you and you're living in a war zone, in reality there is horrible shit but it's not on some terrible crescendo. You feeling horrified and depressed does zilch to make the world a better place. Turn off the news and do something.

I hardly slep last night thinking about 'that' case.
Everytime I think I've forgotten for a while it comes back like a body blow.
I can't cry because if my dh knew why it would really bother him.
He too gets deeply upset by these things.
My dsis is coming today for a few days and I have been so excited until last night.
I just want to curl up and cry at the state of humanity.

[quote thebabessavedme]@Moraxella, I'm willing to bet I know which piece of news has upset you so much, I won't name it as MN has already removed a couple of threads as the case is still ongoing, however, I think it will haunt me forever, I dont often cry over things but this has had me sobbing several times now and I wake in the night feeling so incredibly sad.

I also agree with all of the above posts, right now the world feels a very evil place to be - What I do do though is to try and read an uplifting piece of news everyday, there are still good people out there![/quote]
I feel the same and can’t get the upsetting images out of my head.

Feel like I need to do something practical. I have decided to write to my mp, as well as the minister for children, calling for action and more money for social services, and for a ban on smacking in England. I am looking into volunteering with HomeStart. I don’t know what else to do. I feel so hopeless and sad.

A sense of history definitely keeps things in proportion.

I recommend Andy Beckett's book 'When the lights went out' about the 70s (the sequel, 'Promised you a miracle' about the 80s is good too) and Hans Rosling's book Factfulness. The latter is particularly helpful with techniques to evaluate horrific news stories and depressing statistics.

Staying away from the news and social media is also a good idea.

@nervousseacreature it's amazing that you're doing that. I will definitely look into volunteering with Homestart too.

I accidentally stumbled across a headline about 'that' case last night and I can't get it out of my head. I don't like the idea of avoiding the news because I do think it's important to have knowledge in order to drive change, but I just can't read about that. I have three little kids and I can't do it to myself right now.

There have always been specific cases which affect us, I'm quite a big true crime fan so am usually able to stomach quite upsetting stuff, but that case has really bothered me. It's ok to be affected by it and similar stories, you wouldn't be human if it didn't upset you.

I’m with you.

I can’t stop thinking about the cruelty and I really really don’t understand it. I feel awful guilt when I tell my children off, if I shout I worry it’s damaged them. How can anyone inflict such prolonged cruelty on a child?

I really hope both their lives are hell from this point forward.

[quote littleburn]@nervousseacreature it's amazing that you're doing that. I will definitely look into volunteering with Homestart too.[/quote]
I feel so powerless! I wish I could think of something more useful.

I also agree that avoiding the news/social media is helpful but it’s not always possible.

It seems the news article that was put online yesterday affected us all.
I made the decision a few years ago to not read about those kind of cases.
I however found myself getting caught up in that case and reading threads on here..it was affecting me badly.
I agree though that it needs revisting afterwards and we can try to come together to make a change.

Feeling even worse about it today after seeing the video.

I like the saying "You can't help everyone, but everyone can help someone".

It's easy to feel overwhelmed by so many bad things happening in the world but remember that, overall, people are doing a lot to help others.

Focus on smaller things that you can or are doing - support a charity, donate to a foodbank, even chitchat with neighbours helps maintain social connections that can prevent people feeling isolated.

Sometimes even just remember that by paying taxes you're helping money/support being distributed to those in need of it, and not just in this country.

If it's the story I'm thinking of... I am also struggling a bit after reading it. I couldn't watch the video. I feel sick to my stomach thinking about it to be honest.

There have been so many news stories recently about cruelty to young children. I know it's happened for centuries but for some reason I feel like I'm hearing about them so much more lately?!

I agree, it just makes you despair and wonder about the state of the world, and the innocent children living in it.

I said the same to my husband this morning. I don’t know if it’s because we aim to be more tolerant in society. Therefore the bad apples behave like this as they can claim victim status for their appalling crimes, like they were coerced into it by a bullying partner etc. I know that’s incredibly simplistic but if a punishment fitted the crime then this would act as a deterrent in future. An old fashioned view I know.

I too came across the case in question last night. I cried and I can’t stop thinking about it. I really wish the site had of asked viewers permission to proceed before playing bits of the video because I don’t think I will ever forget what I saw.

Also surely the fact that there are so many people saddened, sickened and traumatised by 'that news story' shows that people are in the main good and decent? I haven't discussed it with DH - I don't want to think about it TBH - but I hope he hasn't seen anything because he'll be so upset.

On the other hand think of the love between Kevin Sinfield and Rob Burrows and the tremendous things Kevin has done for motor neurone disease for his best mate.

We all tend to focus on the awful tragedies in life but far far more people are inherently good.
The stories in the news at the moment are heartbreaking, they make me weep but I live in hope that the world is mostly compassionate.

I came here exactly because I couldn’t stop myself clicking on the case we are all talking about, which I had really been trying to avoid as it’s just so gut wrenching. Getting some comfort here from mumsnetters so thank you - look for the helpers. And most people are good, kind and decent and this is why it’s so upsetting.

I too won’t talk about it with my dh or my kids (though they are young I presume it won’t be covered on newsround). My dh would be absolutely devastated by it.

@cushioncovers

I agree op add to this i find animal cruelty and the meat industry barbaric as well. I have trouble switching off from seeing and hearing constant bad news and cruelty everyday.

Yes. Let's not forget the billions of animals that are confined, tortured and killed for the sake of a sandwich every single day.