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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be jealous of Amanda Owen (Yorkshire Shepherdess)

320 replies

AliceAbsolum · 19/11/2021 19:04

Her life just looks amazing. Yes obviously hard at times and not perfect. But 9 lovely children, she's gorgeous, kind husband, successful career, meaningful job and being able to spend time outdoors with her family. All the animals and space.
What I'd give for that life!

OP posts:
WhatHoMarjorie · 20/11/2021 20:26

I thought dentistry was the profession with the highest suicide rates.

LizzieSiddal · 20/11/2021 20:28

I like how Clive comes across in the programme but then remember he went out with a very young girl who was old enough to be his daughter. He’d be a fool to think that relationship would last, considering she must have gone straight from college to being married.

Pissingitdown · 20/11/2021 20:38

@WhatHoMarjorie Dentistry? I wonder why 🤷🏻‍♀️

PickupaPenguin8 · 20/11/2021 20:39

I think she was 21 when they met so not a very young girl.

FindingMeno · 20/11/2021 20:40

She winds me up a bit.

LizzieSiddal · 20/11/2021 20:41

I should not have used the world girl. She was a very young woman in comparison to him.

LizzieSiddal · 20/11/2021 20:46

She was 21, he was 42 when she knocked on his door to ask if she could borrow a ram. He was immediately “very taken to her”. As I said I really like the way he comes over in the programme, but I wouldn’t want my 21 year old Dd going out with a 42 year old.

PickupaPenguin8 · 20/11/2021 20:47

That is kind of suggesting she was taken advantage of. On the contrary, I think she’s a very switched on woman. I suspect she has always had an old head on young shoulders.

Glassofshloer · 20/11/2021 20:50

I definitely envy her energy, tenacity and boldness. She seems to have a relaxed ‘what happens happens’ attitude to life.

9 children and a farm? I would love to be the kind of person that thrives off that kind of thing, but I’m just not.

Lots of overly critical people on here btw.

LizzieSiddal · 20/11/2021 21:02

That is kind of suggesting she was taken advantage of. On the contrary, I think she’s a very switched on woman. I suspect she has always had an old head on young shoulders

I wouldn’t care if my 21 year old was mature for her age, I still wouldn’t want her going out with a 42 year old.

TheVolturi · 20/11/2021 21:17

I have watched the whole series and I can only really admire the whole family. The kids are all amazing, Amanda is strong and hardworking, Clive is lovely.
I know someone said the show is designed to make us women feel shit, it doesn't do that to me, Amanda inspires me. Not to run off and live in the hills and have loads more dc, but just to get on with life and enjoy every day and make sure that the kids do too.

PickupaPenguin8 · 20/11/2021 21:19

@TheVolturi

I have watched the whole series and I can only really admire the whole family. The kids are all amazing, Amanda is strong and hardworking, Clive is lovely. I know someone said the show is designed to make us women feel shit, it doesn't do that to me, Amanda inspires me. Not to run off and live in the hills and have loads more dc, but just to get on with life and enjoy every day and make sure that the kids do too.
Agree!
purpleme12 · 20/11/2021 21:22

I think it's really sad if they are splitting up 😞

Made me very when they went through that montage in that last bit!

PS it's interesting reading some of the comments about Supervet. I don't watch it regularly but I do think some of the things suggested for animals and put through are too much. (And am a bit animal lover). But I don't think I've ever read anything negative about him before till this thread

WeeTattieBogle · 20/11/2021 21:45

@TheVolturi

I have watched the whole series and I can only really admire the whole family. The kids are all amazing, Amanda is strong and hardworking, Clive is lovely. I know someone said the show is designed to make us women feel shit, it doesn't do that to me, Amanda inspires me. Not to run off and live in the hills and have loads more dc, but just to get on with life and enjoy every day and make sure that the kids do too.
I agree.

Her and Clive are inspiring.

derxa · 20/11/2021 21:50

@LizzieSiddal

That is kind of suggesting she was taken advantage of. On the contrary, I think she’s a very switched on woman. I suspect she has always had an old head on young shoulders

I wouldn’t care if my 21 year old was mature for her age, I still wouldn’t want her going out with a 42 year old.

Hmm
MrsPelligrinoPetrichor · 20/11/2021 22:06

[quote Pissingitdown]@WhatHoMarjorie Dentistry? I wonder why 🤷🏻‍♀️[/quote]
No one likes a dentist, do they?

WhatHoMarjorie · 20/11/2021 22:08

I don't think many parents would be thrilled if their 21 year old son or daughter was in a serious relationship with a 42 year old.

NeverBeenNormal · 20/11/2021 22:09

@MrsPelligrinoPetrichor

Apart from the quad bike riding with no helmets ( which is a huge bugbear of my dh's,he always mentioned it when he sees it in telly) what are the other dangers on the farm people have noticed,it's been mentioned a few times? I rember the pony being lifted and brought back in the land rover Shock
I agree with your husband! Basic safety equipment when riding a quad bike is essential - it's a motorbike with four wheels and using it on uneven, hilly terrain, it's very easy to turn over.

I worked on a farm where we had to have instruction before we were allowed on the quad bikes and full safety gear. H&S was taken very seriously and fortunately in my four years there, we didn't have any accidents.

NeverDropYourMoonCup · 21/11/2021 00:48

[quote elbea]@NeverDropYourMoonCup the farmhouse didn’t have any heating, I had an electric blanket for warmth and ice inside the windows.

I’m sure living on a council estate isn’t the most pleasant but I genuinely don’t think it is in anyway comparable to the graft that upland farmers put in.

My husbands family farms in the highlands, have an generator for electric. Most upland farmers aren’t living some life of luxury.[/quote]
Neither did my shitty flat. Best thing about ice on the windows was that it made it warmer inside - and I wasn't able to have an electric blanket because the act of breathing inside in winter, even with the windows open, meant there was condensation running down the walls over the socket.

I didn't say it was luxury. I said I'd rather have had the chance to live somewhere like that and have a job like that compared to what I did have. Which included heroin users shooting up, shitting and pissing on my doorstep because there wasn't a security door, plus £70 a week travel costs to my poorly paid job.

The reality of town life when poor is in my opinion, far more unpleasant than rural poverty - as it's in a town. Not everybody agrees, which is fine. But I would have very much preferred to not be in town.

Kendoddsdadsdogsdadsdead · 21/11/2021 00:51

@PickupaPenguin8

I think she was 21 when they met so not a very young girl.
Oh come on. He was 42. Compared to him, she was a very young girl.
blowtheroofoff · 21/11/2021 07:55

I think 100 years ago, more, most families would have been like this - huge families, hard drudgery, kids looking after siblings, cold, hardship, getting on with it under tough circumstances. I don't think you can criticise her parenting or lifestyle- against modern standards it looks out of the ordinary but it really isn't

Pawprintpaper · 21/11/2021 08:26

I suppose it’s not so much a race to the bottom of who has the hardest life, but a comparison of the reality of farming compared to the idealistic opinion of those outside the farming community.

I think it’s also important to remember that farms are usually small businesses and subject to many external factors such as the weather, commodity prices, Tb/avian flu breakdowns etc. Farmers can get up at 4am every day, work all hours only to lose money hand over fist, but can’t just walk away or change jobs because of the money they’ve already invested, tenancy contracts and such like, to leave would mean bankruptcy and homelessness for many. They can see their crops wiped out in one storm or lose a whole herd to disease, I’ve heard it said that a farmer is the ultimate gambler, choosing crops to sow based on what world markets will be doing in 8 months time. Cutting your losses early rather than putting more work into a failing crop or a bull who turns out to be infertile.

Also, as with small/family businesses, there will be those who own lots of land/money/assets, plus the rich celebrity hobbyists, who will have a completely different experience, horses, Land Rovers and private schools. And everything in between.

So no, I don’t think given a choice most farmers would prefer the mouldy council flat, but it can be a stressful and insecure life for people who often have enough qualifications to get jobs in better paying sectors off the land, but are drawn back to it and are then often trapped doing it.

You can completely see why the Owens would diversity into media, especially with all those children to raise.

RampantIvy · 21/11/2021 08:28

Well said @Pawprintpaper.

derxa · 21/11/2021 08:50

@blowtheroofoff

I think 100 years ago, more, most families would have been like this - huge families, hard drudgery, kids looking after siblings, cold, hardship, getting on with it under tough circumstances. I don't think you can criticise her parenting or lifestyle- against modern standards it looks out of the ordinary but it really isn't
My dad was one of seven. They had farm workers and my granny had a maid to help look after the children.
knittingaddict · 21/11/2021 08:54

@WhatHoMarjorie

I thought dentistry was the profession with the highest suicide rates.
That's what my husband always told me. He isn't a dentist, but had friends who were.

It's hard to find a breakdown of suicide figures which aren't too general. I know because I looked for this thread. Whatever the worst actually is, farming still has a higher than average suicide rate.

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