in being upset (pissed off) with parents who bring their obviuosly sick children to the nursery?

[QuintessentialShadowOfSnowball]

Shouldnt a child that is coughing his guts out be home? Or with rosy red feverish cheeks? Why do some parents think it is ok to lumber nursery staff with children so ill they need carrying around all the time? Why do they think it ok to keep passing on the germs to other peoples children?

Reallytired, that is just an example of self-justification.

My son has never attended a nursery or playgroup and he's never been ill, either. Your immune system is a genetic luck of the draw, nothing else.

Well, there's living in a germ free bubble and there's just expecting that other people will be reasonably considerate - i.e do there best not to pass on bugs.

Lol at this thread. SOmeone who started a business of selling big glass bubbles would do well for posters on this thread.

hmm.. my boss used to be very self congratulatory, til recently her son had 'never been ill'. He didn't attend nursery or playgroups (she had a nanny).
Then he started school. And he started to get every cold going.

Yeah, but it's a balance, isn't it? I do take your point Spink, it's just that there seems to be some implication that being ill is basically a good thing - it isn't it's unpleasant and inconvenient at best. And as for being anti-WOHM it isn't, as it's the working parents who are going to be most inconvenienced by bugs going around.

Message withdrawn

medised matadors

Sending a really ill child to nursery is unfair on the child and the staff.

There is a difference between the common cold and having flu or vomiting. Colds and small children are a fact of life when a child goes to nursery. A lot of small children have a permamently snotty nose. They would never attend nursery if they were kept off everytime they had a cold.

If you are really bothered about your child catching germs then you should rear them in a sterile bubble. Prehaps a bubble would prevent the child from catching head lice, worms or learning bad language or making friends with kids you disapprove off.

Within reason, it is between the parents and nursery whether a child attends. A responsible nursery will (quite rightly) not tolerate a sick child.

there was research project published a few years back which showed that children who had been to nursery had a lower incidence of leukaemias thn children who stayed at home.

It was one of the few things that made me feel less guilty about sending my dd to nursery.

I'd love to keep my child in a sterile bubble Reallytired but obviously I can't. Why would I want to do that - well she has Cystic Fibrosis and what may be harmless common colds to anyone else could lead to chest infections for her and permanent damage to her lungs. I'm still on maternity leave but am having to face the difficult decision of going back to work or not and if I do what kind of childcare I should use. The thought of parents sending in ill children to a nursery fills me with horror...

No, Reallytired is saying that nurseries send home really sic kids and that for hundreds of thousands of years we have all been sharing germs and still made it to the top of the evolutionary tree.

QS- sorry to hear about your parent's illnesses

ooh I do love these threads.

I think they are increasingly replacing the parent and child parking threads as my absolute favourites. They have all the greatest hits: PFB parents of under 2s vs....the rest of the world, SAHM vs WOHM/WAHM and just generally etc.

THing is, pretty much all nasty illnesses are at their most contagious just before the symptoms appear. So you can point and tut all you like, but whichever kid brought the germ to nursery did so in all innocence - and one of these days it will be your kid who'se picked something up of anotehr kid outside school/nursery and infected the whole lot with it.

My ds has had a cough since September. He also had a cough from last September until March. It's caused by his asthma, but I'm sure there are plenty mums at his nursery who point and tut at the bad mummy sending her toxic son to play with their children.

Yes, this thread does come across as a bit precious.

I wonder how some posters cope if one of their dc's are ill... do they segregate the siblings?

It really is impossible to keep an infant/child fully well during the winter, esp if they got to a child-care setting.

Even if parents are do their best not send in sick children to nursery, children will catch germs of each other. In particular a lot of children are infectous without having symtoms.

It is a balance of risk. If a child is likely to die from a cold then its a bad idea to send them to nursery.

The best we can do as parents is keep our children's vacinations up to date and choose a responsible nursery.

Kids with croup at DS's nursery - DS got it, they all did. But it is part of going to nursery - their immune system takes a banging for the first year then they toughen up. That's life on the outside for you, I suppose.

DS has also came home recently with a cold sore, but again, I just try to be philosophical abot it and think it's better sooner rather than later. What can you do?

I have heard/read about the childhood cancer thing, too. First children in family are more likely to get it and the theory is that the more common childhood illnesses you get the less likely you are to suffer. I have no idea if this is true or not. But second and subsequent children in families are more likely to pick up day to day viruses (due to exposure from older siblings) and this does help boost immunity (according to the theory).

Having said all that, I think it is unforgivable for people to send really sick children in to nursery or school. By really sick I mean anyone with a temperature, vomiting or diahorrea. Common colds are part of life, almost constant in toddlers, and pretty much impossible to avoid.

Parents who offer up "well, I've already taken off all my holiday/sick leave" - that's just not good enough. It does not give you the right to spread your germs around your childcarers and the other children under their care. Take your employers to a tribunal if they threaten the sack.

Parents with sick children have no legal rights, Daphne, there's where the problems lies.

I think this is a really difficult one.

I know that when I've asked for my GPs advice on whether my DD is fit enough to be in school (during bad coughs and worse) she has always said that she is. Whereas an outsider might wonder why she is in school with a bad cough etc.

Sometimes kids do perk up when they get to school. I also think that quite a few parents tend to feel that a school will send their child home if they are ill.

There can also be anxiety on the part of the parents that a child is missing vital schooling.

I don't think it is quite as simple as parents just unthinkingly putting sick kids into school.

yeah, taking your employers to a tribunal, there;s the answer

Please tell me where it is written on the statute that parents with sick children have no legal rights.

If you are a parent with a child under two and you get, say, 4 weeks holiday per year, then I reckon you should write off 3 of those weeks as "sick leave" to common viruses.

Anyone on this thread who is arguing for sending their child to nursery whilst ill is just saying F you, as far as I can see.

"Parents who offer up "well, I've already taken off all my holiday/sick leave" - that's just not good enough. It does not give you the right to spread your germs around your childcarers and the other children under their care. Take your employers to a tribunal if they threaten the sack. "

Well my friend who was effectively sacked although not offically for taking to much time off. Supposely she was sacked because her IT skills were too weak. (Her job did not require high level IT skills) Also her IT skills are not that bad! It was just an excuse.

Also it is next to impossible to take an employer to an tribunal if you have only been there for 6 months. Sad to say, employers can do more or less what they like.

It is really hard working and having a small child. I suppose I'm lucky in that we have relations who help us out of crisis. Not everyone is lucky enough to have family near by.