‘I’m not a Christmas person’

[Theanswerisblowinginthewind]

I keep hearing this a lot recently.

If you’re not a Christmas person, why?

Completely understand that it’s difficult for some people at this time of year with loved ones having passed etc. But if it’s not something understandable like that, why don’t you like Christmas?

I love it more now I have a Dd, but even before that I loved the lights, tree, presents, food, going out etc-what’s not to love?! 🤷🏻‍♀️

I agree with most of these, plus it's a Christian festival and I'm not a Christian.

Everyone needs something to look forward to, for some people this is it. I loved it as a kid, we had mostly what we needed & it was much appreciated, if we were lucky we got one thing that we wanted as well. Get the violins out. The struggle of it all made all so much better, I mourn those days of when we had nothing. These days it’s much too much for me, I either completely ignore it or leave the country.

Dh spent his childhood Christmases with the nanny while his parents went on holiday and I spent mine caring for ill siblings. We don't have any interest in religion, we don't have a Christmas dinner and we do lots of presents and fairy lights all year round. We have some christmas treats but only because they're in shops this time of year.

I loathe Christmas, expensive, forced and the fact that a lot of people around me keep asking if I’ve put my tree up yet (no) is it too early to play Christmas songs (yes) , have I finished my shopping yet (nearly) , what am I doing Christmas Day , am I going to the office party (no) why not? And on and on and on , makes me loathe it even more.

To me it should be Christmas for about 2 weeks in December. Then I'd probably still love it.

I agree. I love Christmas, but can't stand having it shoved down my throat from the beginning of November! By the time it arrives I'm almost over it all. It was different when I was a kid, not nearly as commercialised and the whole thing didn't start so early.

With me it's more about all the hype around Christmas that I hate it sucks people into the belief that unless there are a huge number of people eating at your table then you can

Christmas in my childhood was quite sad so I always struggle with it - the forced jollity, the shallowness of it all - I'm always very relieved when it's over

Why is it difficult to understand that some people just aren't interested in getting involved in all the fuss around Christmas? We're not all the same.

I spend every Christmas and Boxing day on my own, apart from the dog, I have done so for several years, because everything is shut on Christmas day and I'm not interested in venturing out to the shops on Boxing day.

I try to avoid the shops in the days leading up the Christmas as I can't stand shopping in crowds.

There's no special Christmas food in my house as it's never been part of my life as an adult.

There's no reason behind my avoidance of it other than the fact that it's just not something I don't want to get involved in.

I'm perfectly happy about ignoring Christmas. I'm not a misery and I don't feel sad being on my own. It's just not for me.

Money! Sorry but it is....if you can afford to splash out, go out, entertain...then you are extremely fortunate. It has always been a struggle to buy my kids presents, buy in extra food, keep up with what it expected. It is a massive pain in the arse! However, I love to see the twinkly lights..

I am an atheist do no baby Jesus and a donkey for me. And I refuse to spend my hatlrd earned cash on crap nobody needs or wants. We have a midwinter meal which may or may not involve a, turkey depending on what we fancy. No cards. No tree. No decorations. No presents. And guess what we are all happier and less stressed all round.

Christmas reminds me of the year when I was 9 and my Mum (who was not a nice person) bought my sister a puppy. I was totally gutted and Christmas just reminds me of that feeling. I hate it with a passion.

I don't dislike everything about Christmas but I think it goes on for too long and is over-hyped.

Both DH and I come from families who don't expect lots of relatives to get together for Christmas dinner so it's just us and our young adult DC at the moment - I would expect DC to spend it with their own spouses/partners when they have them. I'm also not in the least religious so it feels a bit wrong somehow to be making a huge fuss about "someone else's festival." DH was brought up vaguely religious but it doesn't really play any part in his life any more.

My ideal Christmas would consist of:

Putting up some decorations some time around the 20th

Sending cards only to people we cannot wish a happy Christmas any other way ie older relatives who don't use e-mail or social media

Work Christmas dinner and possibly a Christmas lunch with some friends we do an outdoor sport with (we didn't do this last year, but most years we get together, do what we do and then have a pub lunch afterwards - this is fun)

Evening visit to a Christmas craft market, with mulled wine etc, as late as possible in the month

Christmas Eve candlelit carol service (yes, I know, I'm not religious, but this service is rather charming) followed by not particularly Christmassy pub food

Exchange of presents with immediate family on Christmas morning and traditional roast lunch or dinner (which I cook). Long walk at some point during the day.

Decorations down by New Year's Eve

It wouldn't be an endless round of shopping, eating, drinking and having decorations up for weeks and weeks. DH is a bit more into it and we usually come to some acceptable compromise. But there's a small part of me that would really love to spend Christmas completely alone one year and not do anything at all except possibly have some roast chicken.

If anything, I'd slightly rather celebrate the winter solstice, when there is logically something to celebrate.

“ Well not really. That’s a myth, The pagan festival was celebrating solstice and was before Christ was born, it just changed due to the timing of Christs birth. It is not a solstice celebration and really isn’t the same thing as the pagan solstice celebration”
You’re wrong about this @Bluntness100

In ancient Rome there was a feast called Saturnalia that celebrated the solstice. The time when the days begin to grow longer. Most of the traditions relating to Christmas (aside from Christmas trees, which was a German thing and important Albert, Queen Victoria’s consort. Then later the over-consumerism and tackiness of modern times) come from the early solstice celebrations. Saturnalia was celebrated in ancient Rome on December 25. When Christianity became the official religion in Rome, they adopted this date. There is no question that Saturnalia, then Christmas, was celebrated in Rome with gift giving, candle lighting, singing and decorating houses on December 25.

Personally, I find it tedious when Christians get all preachy to non Christians about “the real meaning of Christmas”. Do your own thing by all means, but do stop preaching to the rest of us.

I loathe Xmas. I don't eat meat, hate Xmas pudding and Xmas cake, can't bear corny awful Xmas songs, disruption in shops, crowds, drunken people, hate tinsel and sparkly tat,.......and don't believe in God,........... Need I go on???

It's all just TOO MUCH

Too much pressure
Too many social commitments
Glitter everywhere on everything
Consumer hell

You just can't escape it and it's overwhelming

@Bertiebiscuit

I loathe Xmas. I don't eat meat, hate Xmas pudding and Xmas cake, can't bear corny awful Xmas songs, disruption in shops, crowds, drunken people, hate tinsel and sparkly tat,.......and don't believe in God,........... Need I go on???

But you like food and time off work and a well chosen gift to give or receive. You like fairy lights and chocolate. You like the sound of a festive choir on the radio, wine and Baileys.

Or maybe you don’t. But you know…it’s what you make it. Don’t loathe it.

@TheRosiePoet

I used to love Christmas when I was younger, but back then it was about celebrating the true meaning. I’m not sure what happened within our family but it’s become such a chore and seems forced and so rigid. There’s no joy or spontaneity and every year it’s exactly the same, same lunch time, foods, music, conversation. Same impersonal gifts.

The countdown to Christmas is getting earlier every year. It is thrown in our faces for months and these new ‘traditions’ are just getting ridiculous. Hot chocolate stations, Christmas Eve boxes, family pyjamas. It is all so commercialised, not at all magical or joyful. It’s all for show and the perfect Instagram photos. People seem to be getting a lot more entitled, expectant and spoilt every year.

Lots of us have been explaining that it was a Pagan festival before being taken over by Christians, so what I’d the true meaning> 🤷‍♀️

I hate

Tat
Gift sets
Over indulgence to the nth degree
Adverts
Competitive spending
Photos of loot on Facebook
Spoiled kids
Elf on the shelf
Elf on the shelf on Facebook
Christmas Eve boxes
Prosecco
Slade
Wizzard
That shit Band Aid song (sorry but it is)
Secret Santa
Stilted conversation with your dh’s boring relatives (and vice versa)
Supermarkets creaming it in
Christmas telly…invariably disappointing

But I still love Christmas. Twinkle, food, time off for most. Be there or be square.

I don’t love Christmas for the following reasons:

• I’m not religious and hated having to go to mass every year while growing up.
• I don’t like roast dinners. I usually have a bit of turkey and stuffing but would much rather eat what I want.
• Too much pressure with buying presents for people.
• most people I know use Christmas as an excuse to get drunk. It sucks and very lonely being the only sober person.
• My family never had any fun traditions over Christmas so not much to look forward to as it’s just like a normal day.
• It’s a bit boring watching the same movies and listening to the same music over and over again for two months.

I had a baby in June though, so might be different now.

Years working in hospitality killed it for me. You really do see people at their worst.
Christmas is a load of balls. Well, it has become so. I wish it was just about family & food & getting together with friends you hardly see.
The obscene spending on stuff makes me feel ill.
Bah humbug.

I used to love it. I still love the thought but over the years I've realised all the nice Christmas's things I try and plan usually end up a shit show with the kids moaning, me and dp arguing or the kids bickering the whole time. We spend an absolute fortune that we just can't really afford ( just back from a 5 day break where we spent a grand! Not including accommodation, that was 650) and then the actual day of Christmas is a let down and never as chrisassy as I hoped. I hate that I feel this was now. I really want to go back to the way I used to feel about it.

It's just too much planning and organising piled up on top of all the usual stuff that needs to be done. Also, we have two of my three kids' birthdays in November - by the time that's over I've had enough partying and family time!

The pressure to see the more distant family "because it's Christmas" and the expected (read: forced) happiness is too much as well. I'd rather see them in less stressful circumstances at other times of the year. But many people tend to take offence if you don't see them precisely on 25th December.

And finally, the pressure to buy, buy, buy... Gifts that nobody needs... Especially now when we are fully aware of what all this wastage does to the environment, it just feels fake and pointless. Fortunately, we're moving in our family towards "no gifts for grown-ups" - or just small perishable gifts (nice edible treats for example) or event tickets. It has taken a lot of stress off this year's celebrations already.

@Dozer

Loved Xmas pre DC. Not enjoyed it since having them!

Dec always v busy at work.

Extra domestic work and ‘mental load’.

Gift matters bring myriad incidents of social angst with extended family, friends, acquaintances - mine and now my DCs’ too.

School festive stuff requiring parents’ time, money and cheer.

Pressure to hide negative thoughts/feelings and to ‘make it special’ for the DC.

Yes!! This

I hate the fuss for one day. The endless questions of what are we doing on Xmas day, what are we eating on Xmas day? What are we getting for gifts for each other? What are we getting the kids? The spending on my debit card makes me feel sick. The pressure to be happy when actually I’m missing my mum and dad even though they died years ago. All for one day.

Christmas has never been special to me because we never had family together due to my parents working. We used to be home alone often on Christmas Day so we didn't ever have a family Christmas until 3 years ago when my brother was 40 and it didn't even seem special then because it is just another day with a few presents in the morning and nice food. We have no traditions as a family because we've never shared that time.