To tell dd to save her "lunch" money

[grecianurn82]

My 15 year old gets 20 euro a week for money for lunch. She buys a roll and a drink every day which costs 4 euro a day. Then at weekends she's usually looking for another 10 to go out with her friends. Aibu to tell her she needs to save her money during the week and bring lunch from home a couple of days?? Her dad (we're separated) is trying to tell me I'm being unfair and apparently the maintenance he gives me is for this. I think 30 a week is a ridiculous amount to be giving a teenager..Aibu??

I think a lot are getting the wrong end of the stick here

YADNBU.

If your DD chooses to use her allowance to buy lunches, instead of taking a packed lunch, then that is on her & it's very cheeky to be asking for more money. Giving her extra isn't a good life lesson on budgeting

As for your ex, he needs to butt out or stick his hand in his pocket

@Moonbabysmum

I think as her parent, you should be making her packed lunch or giving her lunch money, entirely seperate from pocket money.

I don't think you should be expecting her to make her own lunch or sacrifice her pocket money. Ensuring adequate food is part of being a parent

Really? She's 15! Last school year dd was 7 then later turned 8 and was allowed to take packed lunches on the proviso she made it herself as she complained about the limited covid menu (which was perfectly edible if a little boring).

Dd11 gets lunch money but chooses only to buy lunch once a week, although she treats her self to something hot like a panini and chips. If she was just having a roll I doubt she'd bother buying. The rest of the time she saves the money and brings from home. I'd say give her an overall amount to include lunches so she can choose rather than separate the 2. Good lesson in budgeting!

To add make sure there are decent lunch things in the house though as an option

This is how I saved spending money when I was at high school in the 90s. I got £1 a day for the canteen and would only buy a 25p sausage roll meaning by the end of the week I had enough money to get a bus into town on Saturday to hang out with my mates. My family were poor and there was no spare money.

@PinkMochi

So much hate about my comment about OP helping her Dd with a packed lunch. What I meant was that op could give Dd some lunch ideas! Show her how to prepare food (rather than just a ham sandwich everyday). So many triggered women. How dare a mum make her Dd some food?

I really do get what you’re saying - there are soooo many (not uncool) things that can be made into a fab lunch, and maybe the OPs DD does need some help getting started. Going back a fair few years I bought my DSD a bento lunchbox, prepped the first two FOR her, the next two WITH her, and she was hooked. And her friends DID start to take them too. To be fair, some days were meh, can’t be bothered and she bought something at school/in town … but mostly, she enjoyed them so much she did make the effort. When it got colder, I bought her a food flask and she’d either take soup, chilli, bolognese, casserole, lasagne etc. with bread/garlic bread. The latter didn’t go down too well with the bus driver apparently.

@PinkMochi

So much hate about my comment about OP helping her Dd with a packed lunch. What I meant was that op could give Dd some lunch ideas! Show her how to prepare food (rather than just a ham sandwich everyday). So many triggered women. How dare a mum make her Dd some food?

I suppose because that's better placed for a dc or primary age not at 15. My 11 year old will make tortilla parcels from left over taco meat, chilli or bolognese or fry up some halloumi and bacon for a pitta - that's when she can be bothered. Mostly she'll shove a slice of cheese on a bagel. 8 year old is fat more creative and goes in for the full on veg and dips, prepared fruit, salad in her wrap, grating the cheese etc as it's more of a novelty. 15 year olds should be able to prepare any packed lunches they fancy but it doesn't need to be anything special to compete with a petrol station chicken roll!

Teenager is going to be worried about money, miss out on lunch and going out with friends if they have no money. The essentials need to be covered. If you as parents cannot afford this small amount of money maybe it is time teen gets a part time job?