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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU-Leaving Property

220 replies

Wingingit202122 · 06/11/2021 08:33

I’m currently in the process of completing a mutual exchange (house swap for council/HA tenants) and was wondering if IABU
i found a couple (mid 60s) who are downsizing to my flat and i am having there’s so we then filled all forms and had to send in proof of passport and address
We have had all of our inspection checks done and everything was ok so now we have been given a date to sign new tenancys
When we looked at each other’s property we were discussing what things we would leave behind and what we would take but agreed nothing to be certain until we had approval swap was actually going ahead
The husband emailed me last night with a list of things they were leaving in property and things they were expecting me to leave
They are leaving- carpets throughout the house also in bathroom and kitchen (31 years old which stink of dog), old curtains, lampshades, old fridge freezer and even older cooker, wardrobes and old bed frames
They are requesting i leave the same as a like for like swap so that none of us have the ‘stress of moving these heavy items’
I reply saying I will not leave any of these items as ive only had all of my items for less than 2 yrs as i got everything brand new when i moved to this house as had been in a shelter before this so had nothing. I had anticipated having to leave The carpet as don’t know how i would move this but wasn’t planning on leaving my living room wood flooring as i can use this in new house
Also my beds and childrens furniture i want to take, also my kitchen stuff!

He has replied saying they will now have to rethink the exchange as they don’t have the money to replace anything
I don’t understand as they can just bring there stuff with them and only thing to replace is the carpet

OP posts:
Justilou1 · 06/11/2021 20:18

These CF’s definitely saw you coming @Wingingit202122…

RandomMess · 06/11/2021 20:18

Your biggest carpet would fit one of their smaller rooms surely? At least make a big rug and better than the dog smelling old ones they have.

Peace43 · 06/11/2021 20:20

YABVU about the flooring but YANBU about everything else.

MuthaFunka61 · 06/11/2021 21:23

It sounds like you're in a really good position OP and I'd definitely hold your nerve. Reading your updates I think you've been more than reasonable and if the CF's have been wanting to swap for years and haven't planned and saved for reasonable expenses,more fool them. They'll be in the same position regarding white goods if they're allocated a flat via the HA and possibly find they have more outlay than if they swap with you.
They'd be foolish to cut their nose to spite their faces but some people are unfathomable.

G'luck with everything,I'm hoping that your next update is posting that you're signed and ready to go. Flowers

Ireolu · 06/11/2021 22:15

They sound like my neighbours(both in their 70S), waiting till the last minute to pull a fast one then using their advanced years as a reason y one shd do their bidding. Don't budge, I think they want to see who will blink first.

billy1966 · 06/11/2021 22:36

Well done OP.

Very cheeky of them.

PumpkinsandTea · 06/11/2021 23:03

@Peace43

YABVU about the flooring but YANBU about everything else.
As stated multiple times on this thread already, when leaving any kind of social housing, even if doing an exchange, the HA or LA insist on coming in and disposing of ALL flooring in the property. This is for health & safety reasons as well as, when the new tenant moves in, anything that is in the property that wasn't there when it was built, is legally the responsibility of the Landlord/HA/LA to maintain & replace! So I do not blame OP at all for wanting to take her flooring, rather than having it scrapped by the HA! Also, for the same exact reasons, the property she moves into will also be stripped bare of everything inc flooring!
LovePoppy · 07/11/2021 01:20

@FateHasRedesignedMost

As you’ve paid for their removal company, why is he fussing over buying white goods and flooring? They have their own and don’t have to move anything themselves.

He could easily have the removal men roll up one of his carpets to cover the space where your wood flooring was?

I suspect they’re thinking of the size difference in house/flat and are considering your nice modern white goods, new furniture and wood floor a ‘perk’ of the exchange. They probably don’t realise your flat is in high demand, and that they’d have to pay for their own removals and purchase carpets from scratch if the council moved them.

It’s bizarre he thinks you’d be happy to exchange your new furniture, curtains and white goods for old ones in poor repair!

Didn’t you know? Young people don’t deserve nice things, and should be grateful for scraps
Bogeyes · 07/11/2021 01:55

They are trying to take the piss

Whereismumhiding3 · 07/11/2021 02:20

I'm pretty sure also that they need to leave the property vacant and flooring will be removed. Our HAs do it for H&S reasons too. For eg carpets left can be infested with fleas and electrical items/ white goods can be faulty . As LL they are responsible for providing a clean habitable flat.

I think you are better discussing this with the HA
They shouldn't be leaving any of their (tatty) furniture or old fridge freezers... tenancy swipe via HA are not the same as negotiating for a house purchase or a swop between private LL properties.

There is sometimes an incentive one off £500 towards moving fees on offer for older people in historic tenancies downsizing from 3 beds to smaller properties with less bedrooms.
I'm sure the HA tenancy team will be able to advise you

Do you really need their old fridge freezer when you probably have your own brewer one you can take. You have time to get advice from HA and change your mind in what you agree to. "I've decided against this now and would like to move into a clean property with my belongings & flooring that I paid for .. as HA advise they remove & destroy floorings anyway / dispose of any old items left by previous tenant..."

Whereismumhiding3 · 07/11/2021 02:24

I meant that some HAs /BCs offered incentive one off payments to older people with historic tenancies downsizing I'm sure that was a local thing bc our area has shortage of 3+ bedded properties.

(One of my BFFs worked as a housing officer)

beachtosunset · 07/11/2021 03:32

I don’t understand as they can just bring there stuff with them and only thing to replace is the carpet

They wanted your newly fully furnished flat and someone to off load their old toot on to for free! Shock

halloweenie13 · 07/11/2021 03:38

Anything fixed to the house don't bother anything independent however i.e. beds, drawers, fridges etc. I would take

Mjjbgfessrgb · 07/11/2021 04:00

That's so rude of them. You need to play them at their own game.

Dear Cheeky Fuckers,
Such a shame, I wish you luck in your continued search for a ground floor flat. I'll let the HA know the swap isn't happening on Monday. There's been other interest anyway so I don't want to waste my time.
Kind regards, Winging It.

StormyTeacups · 07/11/2021 07:49

"almost pensioners" Shock 😂

Q123R · 07/11/2021 13:20

Out of interest, why are you paying their moving costs?

LivingLaVidaBabyShower · 07/11/2021 13:26

Well done OP. He has some cheek!!!

My money says they will progress but wait until the last minute.

Original poster
Wingingit202122 · 07/11/2021 16:14

@Q123R

Out of interest, why are you paying their moving costs?
@Q123R it had been discussed about a month into the process that they may have to pull out of the exchange as were unable to afford the removal costs. In the spur of the moment ( and not wanting the whole thing to fall apart!) i had offered to pay for it thinking it wasn’t going to be that expensive Guess I should have known from then how things were going to pan out!
OP posts:
niveaessential · 07/11/2021 16:15

why do you need to pay to replace their old carpets? pp have said that the HA will come in and tear out any flooring you leave behind, so why won't they clear out the house before you move in? also (just curious) why are you paying for their moving company? I'm in Canada and we don't do that here, even in social housing.

Original poster
Wingingit202122 · 07/11/2021 16:15

Still no response from them, i think they’re trying to make me sweat thinking i will give into their demands if they give the impression they are ‘thinking things over’

OP posts:
Original poster
Wingingit202122 · 07/11/2021 16:19

@niveaessential

why do you need to pay to replace their old carpets? pp have said that the HA will come in and tear out any flooring you leave behind, so why won't they clear out the house before you move in? also (just curious) why are you paying for their moving company? I'm in Canada and we don't do that here, even in social housing.
@niveaessentialgrom what i’ve managed to find online, once we sign the tenancies over at the office we then swap keys and move pretty much straight away. The HA don’t come into the property and remove anything as your swapping for ‘as is’ It’s only if the property was then empty and vacant in between tenancies do they come in and remove carpets/flooring/left rubbish etc
OP posts:
Theunamedcat · 07/11/2021 16:25

Housing association don't come in and strip properties when your doing an exchange you sign the papers and move they put in if your leaving or exchanging furniture though for example we had integrated appliances in ours we obviously left she left the fridge but took the cooker as she hadn't paid it off and traded it back in to brighthouse we were literally running the van one way with our stuff one way with hers and swapped it room by room

Theunamedcat · 07/11/2021 16:26

And she left her rabbit and said you can have him my kids arnt interested

FangsForTheMemory · 07/11/2021 16:30

I would leave the flooring and curtains unless you particularly want them, but nothing else. I do wonder if part of the attraction of the exchange for them was getting your ice new stuff!

Duchess379 · 07/11/2021 16:41

They're cf's! Doing the 'we're old pensioners with no money' routine. They're getting a ground floor flat that they've waited 10yrs for & now expect you to leave white goods that you haven't paid for! Stick to your guns, it'll be cheaper for you in the long run 🤞🏻