Feeling guilty for getting my cat neutered

[Sammy900]

Hey

Just wondering what other peoples views are and if I'm overthinking it or being unreasonable? I just want different opinions, experiences really so I can weigh up both sides....

Today our handsome boy cat went to the vets and was neutered and I've never felt so ethically uneasy and awful about making a decision for a pet. I feel like I've taken away his right to reproduce :(

Everyone keeps telling me it's for the best, he will be less likely to get into fights and be exposed to other illnesses from that, he won't spray around the house. We have two cats a boy and girl and they are brother and sister so it would be a whole load of wrongness later on ....

I just feel so uncomfortable about it, so much that I don't want anymore male pets now that I have to face this decision for. I love my pets and I suppose in some ways, further down the line of the argument it's unfair/restrictive to prevent anything from living a wild and free life.

I guess what I'm seeking is to weigh it all up and get my thoughts in the right frame and hopefully come to the conclusion that it WAS the best decision....any thoughts or experiences of a similar vein ? un-neutered pets that were a nightmare?

What does everyone else think?

Honestly, if someone is upset over the ethics of taking away an animal's reproductive "rights", maybe pet-ownership isn't the best choice for that person. After all, did the animal actually even consent to live with you? How much choice does the animal have in terms of lifestyle, food, and activities? Would the animal be happier living somewhere else or with/without other animals in the same home?

We all make decisions for our pets. If we're good pet-owners, we try to make decisions in the animal's best interests, but ultimately we're imposing our will on them, to some degree, every day. Oh well! That's life with pets! Best to make peace with it now and stop feeling guilty for being the human in the house.

Of course you should get your animals neutered.
It is common sense
I had my boy neutered at 4 months and he is now 8 and has never needed vet treatments due to fighting, he does not disappear for days on end, he does not spray in the house .
He comes in every night to sleep.
I also don't think a female cat needs a litter either there are enough unloved and unwanted cats already.
This really is the most ridiculous post
You can't argue with stupid people

I think maybe it was my opening post and saying "handsome" (he is handsome) that's caused some romantic confusion :D

RunningScarabbed

I agree with all of what you have said. I said above, I love my pets, I'm fine with all the choices I make for them, food, shelter, indoors/outdoors, etc but today I sent my cat in to be neutered and for some reason that has made me feel really uncomfortable. I'm not devastated. I'm just questioning my reasons for it.

It's like the ultimate pettified movement. It doesn't sit well with me really - maybe I need a wild wolf or something I can appreciate from afar

@Sammy900

I think maybe it was my opening post and saying "handsome" (he is handsome) that's caused some romantic confusion :D

Yeah, this has got to be a wind up 🙄

Aberteifi

Shouldn't a good pet owner actually take all into consideration about what is best for them (not the owner).

I get you, 100%. But you have to get them both fixed for their health and happiness.

Also, that handsome boy cat? He’ll have a happier life for sure this way. He would be miserable otherwise.

Not a wind up but I am fighting fires trying to get my point across!

Is there really no other opinion but -castration immediately - the only option, don't even think about it

wow

NataliaSerene

Thankyou. He seems fine actually after the op.

He will be fine and will stay sweet. I adopted a pregnant mama cat that was very young herself. I thought through every decision just like you are doing. I commend you for thinking about it, and gathering info before making your decisions. It’s a rare quality.

Also, I can’t say enough how I relate to your “handsome boy” description. My boy cat, also born in my house, is my best buddy ever. “Handsome” is what pretty much everyone that sees him says about him.

My Catholic friend refused to get her cat spayed as she thought she was taking away its right to be a mother and the cat would be upset with her. She finally changed her mind when it started spraying and was in heat.

NataliaSerene

OMG Thank you!! I'm not coming from a bad place, I mean well..I'm actually thinking out of the box and what my pet would feel like / is best for them

You are anthropomorphising, OP. Nature is cruel

OMG, get your female cat spayed and let someone adopt some unwanted kittens (one of our adopted unwanted kittens is currently having a bath on my lap). There are SO many unwanted cats. Please don’t add any more. Every kitten you add is a different homeless kitten who won’t get adopted.

The cats are given pain medication for the op and seem to recover very quickly, I can guarantee cat sex & giving birth to kittens will be way less nice. They are cats. They are just not going to remember an op. My 3 year old child doesn’t remember their last vaccination. A cat is not going to remember an operation.

I haven’t read the full thread but please tell me you’ve had the female done too!!
If you haven’t you will have Tom cats visiting you and terrorising your girl from about 6 months of age!!!
Years ago my female cat was due to be done (kept her inside) but she’s got it into the garden and then vanished! I searched all night and about 6 am spotted here in a garden backing onto ours, shot off to get her only to find her literally frozen in fear being guarded by the biggest Tom cat I’ve ever seen! He wouldn’t let me near her and tried to attack me - I got a very nasty gash on my arm as I grabbed her and shoved him out the way - I wouldn’t have believed it if it hadn’t happened to me!!
Fast forward a few years we now live in remote countryside in Ireland and my young male cat who had been neutered was viciously attacked by a Tom cat. One was chased off by my dog only to get a very very nasty ripped ear and managed to get blood everywhere in it hallway.
You are saving yourself an absolute heap of problems by having him neutered AND being responsible by not adding to the terrible problem with unwanted litters of kittens!

My wee female cat didn't get spayed until she was almost 2!!! (Thanks covid/lockdown.)

The first couple of times she went into heat it was horrible. Kept the whole house awake, yowling to get out. Every un-neutered Tom in the village showed up and we had fights in the garden. She peed everywhere except her litter tray.

Now she's a different cat, still her usual snuggling self but can go out without the fear of ending up with extra kittens.

Honestly it's the best thing. I have 20+ cats, a mix of bits and girls and they are all seen to. They have such a good quality of life, fit and healthy, no fighting, no patrolling a territory, no unwarranted kittens.

It really is a kindness.

This is my newest and he will be done as soon as he is old enough. He's the result of my neighbour NOT getting their cat snipped.

*Boys and girls obvs.

Here's my two penn'orth:
I think because animals don't have the self awareness that humans do, their life choices are driven even more purely by their hormonal urges. The evolutionary drive for survival of a species creates a situation where provided the next generation is created it doesn't matter whether or not that life path is good for the parent, the effects of this depend on the life cycle of the species. Mayflies mate and then immediately die, their mating causes their death. But evolutionarily that's fine, the species works that way because no parental care is needed so as long as the next generation have been created its job done.
A cat not in the care of a human is in a pot luck situation whether mating causes serious negative consequences. Maybe they get lucky for one litter or two maybe they don't. Because cats can create many many new cats quite quickly so evolution has not protected them greatly from poor outcomes for engaging in the mating game. Unlike, say, an urangutan which reproduces very slowly and there is a huge parental investment, for that species mating / reproduction doesn't routinely cause massive calamities for the parent, but that's cos there survival depends on the parent rearing the offspring for years, unlike cats.
But individual cats in human care get lucky, they get the benefit of the ability of a species that can think ahead, make interventions for a better individual outcome. By circumventing their evolutionary drives (which cares not a jot for the individual) by preventing mating you create a situation where they get to enjoy all the marvel of being a cat (ability to make anything look comfortable, lovely and bendy, whiskers!, relaxing life mostly sleeping etc etc) without any of the negatives of being a rapidly reproducing species and all the inherent danger of mating that brings.
Meanwhile the human gets a lovely furry companion who can purr. Symbiotic innit.
Finally none of this will jeopardise the species cos there's millions of them, so the lucky cat can enjoy the benefit of belonging to a human with a clear conscience (if they had a conscience 😆).

I care for the ferals in my neighbourhood, neutering whenever I can catch them. But a female I hadn't managed to catch had a litter in one of my pots earlier in the summer. Beautiful kittens, happy mother. At about 3 months, one started looking sick & I managed to get it to the vet, and after a couple of days it was euthanised as it had fluid on the lungs. I then watched the rest of the litter succumb to the same virus and die over the next week. Do you have the funds to deal with a litter of sick kittens? (The bill for that one kitten was the equivalent of £250) Will you be able to make the decision to euthanise a sick kitten?

I kind of get you, OP. I felt guilt over some aspect of pet ownership. The mother cat to my kitten who was a queen kept in nice conditions but nonetheless there to breed. The kittens removed from their mother and siblings (I know cats are solitary and would have struck out on their own eventually). Putting them through surgery for neutering.

I adore my cats but having had them I do question some of the ethics of pet ownership and wonder if it will be considered unacceptable in a few generations.

Please get your female cat spayed. Why would you want her to have a litter first? It’s highly irresponsible. Nobody who genuinely cares about the welfare of cats and has an understanding of their needs would even consider this. You really need to step up and do the right thing.

No responsible owner would even be questioning whether spaying a neutering was the right thing to do because they would already have done their research and found out it's a no brainer. You claim to have experience of raising kittens but did not know about many of the issues raised by PP, that is not responsible pet ownership. If you're concerned about your cats living a natural life you could throw them out and condemn them to 2 or 3 years of miserable feral life before they die an unpleasant death. Well cared for domestic cats love long and healthy lives.

I wonder where you got your kittens from, did you buy them or rescue them? If you bought them did you question the ethics of breeding animals for profit?

Nature is red in tooth and claw. Go abroad to any place with a lot of street cats and have a look at the condition they are in. Their lives truly are nasty, brutish and short. We don't want our cats to live like that. Yes, we are altering their natures by spaying them, but we have already done that when we domesticated the species. If you feel ethically concerned with that then you can't have a cat at all. Since you do have them, you have a responsibility to keep them safe, happy and well. Spaying is essential to that.