Anyone else at the end of their tether with toddler illness?

[Glassofshloer]

It’s breaking me.

I thought we were over the worst of the A&E admissions and endless sleepless nights after a YEAR of non stop illness but it’s back.

Would anyone like a thread to vent/support each other? 😢

2 vomiting bugs and 2 colds in the space of 7 weeks here. Do they / we not develop any immunity?

Thanks for the responses & making me feel less alone. But then I wouldn’t wish this on anyone!

Thought she was improving but tonight we have a 39 degree temp & shes off her food. Seems okayish in herself, talking & asking for things, but the familiar dread is creeping in. I just want it to be morning now.

Urgh me too. My son is 3 and has been constantly ill for months. HFM, norovirus, coughs, colds, each of which he is then spreading to me and his siblings. It’s exhausting!

Does anyone else find it’s got to the point where you can’t separate out one cold/cough/bug from another because they all overlap?

Same boat here with 1.5 yo DS. The permanent, low level coughs/colds/runny noses just merge into one now with a ‘bad’ illness superimposed about every 2-3 weeks on top. My DH, who is usually absolutely indestructible, was down with HFAM last week, most poorly I’ve seen him in ten years. I’m getting all of DS’ tummy bugs as it seems to be my weak point. I feel so bad wishing his little life away but this stage needs to be done right now!

Yes here too! Virus, 3-4 colds (I lost count), chickenpox now a virus, sore throat and constipation 😭 Ds will only sleep being held bolt upright so dh and I have been taking 2 hour shifts for the last 3-4 nights. Banning soft play for the rest of the winter!

Yes same here! My 2yo has had chicken pox, 2 colds, HFM, an ear infection and conjunctivitis all within 2 months, they’ve barely been to nursery, it’s maddening! I hate getting that call of doom to go and collect them from nursery because they are ill yet again!

Banning soft play for the rest of the winter!

Soft play is an absolute cess-pit of toddler germs! Hate it. But on the other hand if they don't do these things how do they develop healthy immunity? Ugh. It's so difficult.

DS now seems to have recovered from the latest tummy bug (touch wood) but his sleep, which wasn't great anyway, has gone to absolute shit since we've had all these back to back illnesses and I've no idea how to get it back on track. He was up at 4am today and wouldn't go back to sleep, I tired everything but he was having none of it! By the time I got to work at 7.30am I already felt like I was ready for bed

Dd is 2 and has been in nursery for a year or so now. The last few weeks have just been one cold and virus after another. She has a sore lip from constant runny noses and its just exhausting. Dh keeps catching them too and he's self employed so it's costing us a fortune when he can't work. He's sick this week and it's awful to see, and I'm just shattered. We're having to put them in nursery extra early too as dh can't drive while he's this ill, so the kids are shattered too. It's just all shit. I'm so done with it.

We're the same here OP, 2 year old twins who have built up no immunity and started nursery a couple months ago and they've been I'll ever since and now one of the little monkeys has given me the shits 💩

@Evelyn52

We're the same here OP, 2 year old twins who have built up no immunity and started nursery a couple months ago and they've been I'll ever since and now one of the little monkeys has given me the shits 💩

Haha sorry Evelyn I did giggle at the poo emoji because I’m really quite immature!

I was sobbing to DH tonight that I don’t want any more children because the last year has broken me, I have constant knot in my stomach and I feel so sick with worry and fatigue all the time.

It’s been over a year, why isn’t it getting better? A couple of months I accepted but a fucking year? I can’t go on like this

I’ve emailed about taking some unpaid months off work because I cannot do a winter again like last time

Yeah. My twins started playgroup at the beginning of Sep and attended less than half the sessions. Two poorly 2.5 year olds for the best part of two months solid is no joke. Their dad caught it. I caught it and my cough from the second bout has only just cleared. We gave it to my entire family the third time because they decided to only show symptoms after we arrived for a long weekend. No Covid so far, thankfully, but it has been a tough couple of months. They've been back a week and boy twin is already snotty again... 😩

@Glassofshloer

Does anyone else find it’s got to the point where you can’t separate out one cold/cough/bug from another because they all overlap?

Yes! And then it's like.. is this a new cough? Or not and I have to try to remember if the old one went away. We might as well just do a weekly PCR test on the little one at this point.

Gosh my hat comes off to those with twins doing this, it really does.

It would be bad enough if hospitals were adequately run and equipped, but it’s even worse when every A&E trip means a 4 hour wait in a crowded waiting room full of drunks and drug addicts. I have no faith in the NHS after our most recent trips and I think that has made things worse, I don’t feel reassured. Not sure if it’s just our hospital but the country’s health system feels scary at the moment.

I’m going down from full time to 4 days as I can’t handle it anymore. I’m sick and tired of always being sick and tired.

Commiserations to everyone - it all sounds awful. I've been telling myself it will just be the first six months but sounds like I should brace myself for more We were relatively lucky this weekend - she was sent home Friday afternoon but temp only lasted 36 hours and she's back in nursery (albeit snotty) today. But it was the 4th weekend out of the last 5 that we had to cancel plans to see friends or family - I know this is not the most stressful or miserable aspect (time off work and lack of sleep win those prizes) but we've really struggled with the fact that endless baby illness has meant a dramatic reduction in our ability to recharge by hanging out with/commiserating with/getting the baby temporarily entertained by friends and family. We both used up love lazy weekends at home with no plans but now the ability to hang out with other adults while parenting feels crucial to keeping our sanity and we are REALLY missing it. Anyone else?

Yes @Etherealhedgehog I have the most terrible mum guilt for being angry at missing social events etc because above all all that matters is our kids are okay. But these bugs have now lasted nearly half of DD’s life and I’m becoming increasingly resentful of the memories they are stealing. She has been sick though both of DH’s birthdays, most of the run up to last Christmas, the 2 weeks we took off to move house (very stressful time), her own birthday and almost all of my annual leave.

It feels like everyone else’s toddler gets the odd snotty nose or temperature but doesn’t go as downhill or for as long as my Dd - we have had numerous bouts of croup needing A&E, conjunctivitis, vomiting bugs which we all caught, colds, coughs, chest infections, slapped cheek… one after the other after the other.

I try very hard to remain positive but after all this time I can see a winter of hell coming up if I don’t take action.

None of the other toddlers in my family get ill this much, nowhere near, but they don’t attend nursery which makes me feel more than guilty.

So happy to have found this discussion!

Could cry reading all this as I can relate so much!!!

it's consuming me right now and has done since my little started nursery. So much to the point I've withdrawn her as it's costing me a fortune and causing me more grief. Half a day in and then ten days out unwell. Oh and not to mention the Covid policy with showing a negative result every time they have the slightest if coughs. Which is pretty much all the time for mine right now

Just got rid of an ear infection now she has hand foot and mouth. I seriously don't remember it being this bad with my first!??

I wonder at what age it starts to ease off and they build up some immunity?

Like you all said feels like a long winter ahead

How are you all this evening by the way? I find just after dark to be the worst time, not only does DD seem to feel her worst then but the night seems so long.

Welcome to the thread nobody wants to be on @cookiesandcream24 and sorry to hear of another mum having such a hard time of it! How is your daughter this evening?

Constant illness here since the term time kids came back to DDs nursery in September. It's so bad I'm actually considering quitting my job as I have.no family to look after DD when she is too sick for nursery.

@Glassofshloer thank you! Solidarity if nothing else.

Yes the nights are so lonely aren't they. I'm alternating calpol and nurofen which seems to work well as means the high temperature doesn't creep back in. But we will be on day 7 of a high temperature tomorrow so will have to call the sodding GP again I guess. I'm like hiiiii it's me again!

My OH works away for sometimes long periods so I can be alone for up to 2 weeks some times it's hell on earth when she's like this.

How's your little one tonight? Fingers crossed for any kind of sleep tonight!!!

Yep we are in the same boat, irs absolutely awful. DD started nursery 11 months ago and just has had one cold / cough / chickenpox / viral bug / HFM / RSV after another

We had 2 weeks of holiday, just us, away from everyone and she was such bloody brilliant company for the last week as she wasn’t ill. It made me quite sad for her that she can be whiny and clingy but it’s because she’s always unwell

I’ve found my people!
Shame this is what we all have in common.
Ds just turned 2 and has been ill constantly since September. He keeps sharing his germs with me too. I’m having a nightmare with work as I keep going off sick. We’ve had so many stomach bugs 😖

He’s cutting his last molars now, which probably isn’t helping. Snotty and miserable. I’m so ready for this phase to be over.

And we still haven’t had covid, which feels like an inevitably by now.

I feel so bad for everyone impacted by this. It’s hard work raising toddlers and trying to hold down a job.

Etherealhedgehog I am SO glad you've brought this up. Getting out of the house and seeing friends (even when I'm shattered and I have to force myself!) is the only thing that keeps me sane sometimes when the pressure of juggling kids and working FT starts to get to me. Over the past few weeks I've had to cancel plans with friends frequently, often at the last minute. I feel guilty for letting my friends down, and guilty for feeling disappointed that my plans have fallen through because it feels like my only concern at that time should be my poorly child. Then I remind myself that I am a person as well as a Mum and I'm allowed to look forward to these things and be sad when they don't happen. It's hard.